I've been trying to reach out to a community who may be able to understand what I have been going through for a while lately. I have had a number of different spiritual experiences that I am struggling to understand. I've always known it's been there but I think I blocked it out for a long time. It is all kind of coming at once right now and it is a little overwhelming.
I have always felt different, ever since I was a child, it was hard to explain. I just knew I didn't fit in. I struggled to make friends and the ones I did make, I had overly strong connections to. I realize this now that I had known these people in past lives. However, I struggled to keep the friendships I did make.
Lately, I have been channeling someone named, Elda, who has told me that she is my protector, that she comes from the highest of the heavens and earth, that she is higher than the guardian angels and the individuals close to me who have died. She has told me that she is very powerful, in a good way. I'm new to this so I'm not sure if there is a hierarchy in the spiritual world but from my understanding, she is sharing that she is ranked the highest. When I was in a really bad car accident a few years ago, she told me that it was her that ordered the angels to protect me. Things have been different ever since I had my car accident. I always wondered why I was kept alive and knew there was something bigger out there for me.
I'm new to channeling and sometimes I doubt myself when it happens. Elda feels very real. I have often had conversations in my head where it felt like someone was giving me answers.
Now, it seems like I can't find a way to control the channeling. Things are going on in my head all the time I feel as if I am losing my mind. I'm not sure if I am actually channeling when I have the conversations in my head or if I am going crazy. Sometimes it feels like that. I am trying to tell myself that this is just me realizing my abilities and gifts.
I have started channeling now using pen and paper. It started with me writing out the words Elda was saying to me. Now I just do lines and scribbles and it just kind of comes as she is talking.
I have also had other visions when I was meditating that were so powerful that I began to cry. Some of the visions were related to my past lives and others were related to my future. I'm not sure though if these visions are going to come true or not or if they are real.
Elda has also told me recently that I am supposed to write a book. I have known that for a really long time but could not figure out what to write a book about. She told me what it would be about and who I was going to meet to help get it published and this book was going to change lives. I've always known there was more to me out there and that I was supposed to do something bigger. I wonder if this is why I was kept alive in the accident?
I guess I am just looking for some answers or someone to connect with to share these experiences with and doesn't think I am crazy so I don't feel so alone and overwhelmed.
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