Every night, I have dreams. These aren't your regular ponies and butterflies we're talking about. It's really more death and visions to the future. If I have a dream, it's either something about my best friend being dumped by her boyfriend, or gaining one. Most of my dreams turn out dark, but others might come out bright, and unexpected.
For instance, it was the day before I went to a class field trip to the holocaust museum. I had never been there before, and I was excited to see how it turned out. I expected it to be an old looking kind of museum before I went to sleep. But when I dreamt about it, I saw about 3 bookshelves, and sculptures with candles on the top. I saw newspapers, and photos, and souvenirs of when this happened. I also saw a concentration camp, where everything of course happened, and it was like, I had been there before.
On the day it was our field trip, when I walked in, I saw everything, just as I saw in my dream. Everything was just in its place, and I really thought that it was just a coincidence. But then, not so recently, I had a dream about death. It's always someone in my family that dies. But when I dream about it, it's always the wrong person. I'll dream about me dying, and being alone in a dark space, no windows, no holes, just a big, dark, empty place. Then about 3 days later, I find out one of my family members is in the hospital.
I don't want to talk about what my dream is because then people might think it's witch craft. Even though I know that doctors and their technology today are very advanced, there's no cure for the future. I still have dreams about someone dying, and it won't stop. I stay up in the middle of the night to stop myself from seeing such horrid things. But it's like the forces are pulling me down, they make me sleep, even though I don't want to. They know I'm the only connection of my family that can see what will happen next. I forcefully watch that person die in pain and agony.
And about 2 days later, they pass away. And no one can really explain to me why this happens, because I know that it was to happen, the way it did. This would be a frightening sight for a child, but for pre-teen like me, it's even scarier. I don't know who is going to die, or who is going to lose a boyfriend, or how. I've also had a dream about 30 houses on fire. Then this wildfire started, and I think to myself, am I doing this? Am I the one that is putting other people in pain and agony? Or is it just a coincidence. I used to wonder when I was about 5, how would it be to see a ghost, to experience that scared rush that goes through you. That's when I started to see ghosts, and witches, and hear noises coming from beneath beds, and creeks on floors.
Now, every time I turn around; a dark figure is following me, and I regret ever making that wish come true. It won't leave me alone, or pass on. It's always a dark figure, but a different person each day. I don't do anything about it because I have my own personal problems to deal with, and I don't know how the hell to deal with someone else's. It never made sense to me how I can have the burden of these gifts, but still I enjoy what I have. I've always hoped that one of my dead family members, would come back to find out how to live again, or how to make things right that weren't before.
Go ahead and write your comments, or what ever you would like to do. I just write this down, because most of you out there with these cries for help sometimes need answers, and I just might be it. I might not understand my gift all that much, but I understand it enough to know that I have to be responsible of it. I might make this sound all bad, but when you feel the power that goes through you, you just feel like it's going to be alright. Even though it can distract me at many times, it has its way of making an enlightening appearance.
As I turn around now, I see the shadow with me, but I put it aside, because I don't know how to handle it yet, but I will very soon.
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