Who Am I? Am I Human?

By innocentflowergirl
Date: 2010-10-04
Country: United States
State: North Carolina
Category: Telepathy / Empath

I don't know where to start exactly... But I guess I'll start from the beginning. As a child, I was never considered normal. Ever since first grade, my problems began. I use to be very attached to my mom and never wanted to leave her side for a moment, I manged to get through kindergarten but first grade was much more stressful for me, I cried every morning I had to go to school. For some reason I was afraid of my mom leaving me but I have no idea why I got that way out of the blue. It got so bad that my mom had to pull me out.

My life growing up was very lonely... I couldn't connect to anyone, no one understood me. I kept to myself... I often played video games to hide the loneliness. Plus it was the only thing that I could connect to. I often wished that I were on another planet and I felt that was where my soul mate was. I also had this feeling I was here for another reason as well... Like I wanted to help the world. And questioned if I belong here or not.

I even pretended I had a imaginary boyfriend but once I was 13, I was so lonely I felt I had to find him another way. That he wasn't just going to pop out of no where. So I joined forums, since I felt people there would have some connection to me. At least I thought they would...

I made friends... I had online relationships but they didn't work out, I got tired of the forums and I made a Myspace profile. But not like a real life one, a role play one. If your confused about what I mean, it's like acting on the computer. Of course the same results but I still kept a Myspace profile.

Once when I was 15, my mom had a friend who took me to a psychic. I didn't really know what to believe but I was curious and so I went. It was really weird, she knew everything about me, even though I told her nothing about me at all. She even told me that I was going to find my soul mate and when I found him I wouldn't take him serious to begin with and pick on him. I was confused at what she meant, not believing I'd ever be that way. Before I left, she even gave me a hug and told me to hang in there. This made me worried, like there was something she wasn't telling me.

Well after that, when I became 16, that's when the really weird stuff started happening to me. I had a friend on Myspace who really liked me, I didn't take him serious because there was someone else I liked and I often picked on him for liking me so much. I started getting these dreams that kept repeating. In the dream, we admitted feelings for each other. I kept getting the dreams until I decided to give him a chance. So I did... And we got together. And to this day, we're still together. So you see what the psychic said was right, I didn't take him serious and picked on him.

Now that you know my history, I should explain more of my psychic powers. It's like every year my powers get stronger... To start with, it was reading peoples emotions. I can sense peoples emotions even if I have never meet them in person, even if they are on a computer and I never heard their voice before. I can tell wither their sad or happy... How they feel about things, etc. If I sense a bad vibe about someone, I get a hunch of what they are going to do before they do it. Then they do it and it confirms my hunch was correct.

I've also been able to predict things through my dreams and talk to love ones to a point. Like once, I had a dream after my cat Milo died, I was outside, it was all white. I saw Milo and ran over to him crying and saying how sorry I was for his death. But I then smiled once I saw he was no longer in pain and that he had no stitches anymore.

I had a dream about my grandma... Actually this was before I became psychic. It was just a image of her smiling and I could sense from her smile that she was saying, that everything was alright, she was happy and not to feel guilty about her death.

Recently I met my boyfriend in real life and everything was so perfect, it felt like a dream. I could even sense from his presence, that its like we've be together forever. That we've lived millions of life times together and can get through anything together. We were both depressed for days since I had to come back... And I got a lot of weird dreams. This is when the predictions started.

To start with, I had a dream that my mom had a dream about a friend of hers that died awhile back. I wake up and she tells me she had a dream about him. Then I had a dream my sister was at the house with my nephew and she had a little girl with her. I had a feeling that she was going to get pregnant and a few days later, she calls my mom and tells her she is.

What I need help with is... I want to know what I am exactly. Yes, I know I have to be psychic but sometimes I feel there's more to me then just that. My feelings for things are so strong and its often painful. So I want to know how to deal with the stress of all of it... And some of the visions I get scare me. I had a nightmare my moms friend died and I hope that's not going to be true... It just scares me a lot since she has a lot of medical problems and my predictions lately have been correct.

I also feel depressed because it effects my social life with making friends. I have people who understand and believe me... Like my boyfriend. But he doesn't know what advice to tell me. I want friends who can relate to me and so I have some idea of what to do. I just get this feeling of being otherworldly... And no one else feels that way to me, besides my boyfriend. Whats wrong with me? Why can't I trust normal people at all? Why does their presence make me feel alone and like I'm the only person who feels this way?

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Comments about this clairvoyant experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, innocentflowergirl, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

Shaolin (1 stories) (212 posts)

14 years ago (2010-10-06)

Make sure to be yourself, find your own way, if things don't feel right to you, find out why. Think about karma... It's not some justice force, it's the result/s of the law of attraction, if you be negative, negativity will gravitate to you. Think about all those who hurt many people, yet live rich lives of luxury, and die of old age.

Another thing, being psychically active is a very hard "difference" to deal with than stuff like acne or puberty, at least the world as a whole (I would think) believes in those two things. Take your time with everything you need to, you are alive to grow, not to be pushed into a mold and shipped off to perform the same task everyday for your whole life. Be somebody, those who say whoever is delusional for their beliefs in this is someone who needs to take a look at themselves, but won't because they don't believe it's real. You are your own being, remember that and always be it.

gaiamara (19 posts)

14 years ago (2010-10-05)

innocentflowergirl: I was just reading your reply to AnneV (lovely advice there, Anne!) and thought of something that might help you a little bit. When negative experiences occur in a residence they tend to leave a residue or impression. This might be contributing to your depressed state whilst at home.

If you can have the house to yourself for a couple of hours (just so you don't have to deal with the questions and remarks) then you could psychically "cleanse" the house -focussing upon the areas that feel the ickiest or make you sad. There are myriad ways in which to do this but I find sage smudging is really effective. Sage sticks are available from many New-Age or Occult stores, or you can just get some dried sage from the supermarket and burn it.

What you need to do is waft the smoke around the areas that you wish to cleanse, and it helps to visualise the smoke "pushing" away the dark, negative energy. Do this with all the windows and doors open so you can clear the smoke out (as well as the neg. Energy) and no one should be the wiser. Can always burn some toast to cover the smell or something lol.

For more info, just google smudging or energetic cleansing and you ought to get a fair few hits. Pick what works for you!

Anyhow, best of luck and many blessings to you ❤

innocentflowergirl (guest)

14 years ago (2010-10-04)

Anne, thanks for the support. I know that sooner or later things will get better. It's strange when I'm at out of the house, its not as bad.

But when I'm at home with my parents, its like I always feel so negative. I've always been effected by surroundings and weather. I guess it's also because I never got along with my parents.

It's mostly my dad though, he always emotionally abused me and being in the same house, reminds me of all the painful memories.

I want to just be strong and not let it bother me; but its like something about the house, just drags me down so much and I feel emotionally drained...

AnneV (4 stories) (1064 posts) mod

14 years ago (2010-10-04)

You are like the rest of us. You're a soul that's incarnated here in this plane to further your spiritual growth. We are all psychic to some degree, but we are also here to learn and grow. Most of us have roles that develop as we mature. Some are here to be teachers, guides, artists, leaders, and so on. You are still developing into your future role. Be patient, it will unfold at the perfect time.

Waiting for your social life to improve to be happy may be a long time in coming. You are wanting people to come up to your speed and when they don't you get depressed. Your inner happiness shouldn't be dependent on the development cycle of another human being. I write these WebPages and counsel many people but nary a relative, co-worker or friend in my physical existence has any clue what I'm about and that is okay because we are all where we need to be at in this moment. We can only be what we are ready for. It's the ego that says it needs reinforcement from friends and the like. My happiness is my responsibility, not someone else's. Yes, it can feel very solitary but think of how Christ or Buddha felt (hardly anyone "got" them!). If they waited for 'support and confirmation' from friends and colleagues, we'd all not have had their teachings. Wait if you like to be happy but as you've already found out, rare is the person who is extremely open to this kind of thing.

We are all otherworldly. Coming to this place is difficult because that's how it is set up. And those that aren't struggling in one way, are struggling in another. An example might be someone with lots of money isn't struggling in that way, but they may have health problems etc. Our lessons will not let us down! They will find us and we will learn, in this lifetime or the next.

The person with health conditions will die, just like you will. We all do. When our time is right, we pass on, and from what I've personally seen and heard of the afterlife, the pity should be on us, not them.

Anne

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