I am 31 years old. I have had experiences since I was young but due to religion and guilt, I buried them and would not recognize them if they happened. In the last year and a half, they have emerged again and I decided to put away fear and let what happens happens. However, I have no one to talk to about such things. I am not crazy, paranoid, or have any mental illness. I am normal with a little extra something that supposedly everyone has but no one is talking, lest they think someone believes you are crazy or sick. Here are my experiences.
When I was two, I told my mother I had died and so had my uncle and sibling due to a gun shot and drowning. It freaked her out. Again, I was only two. This was on vacation visiting family in Chicago. I also told her I could show her where I used to live. But she didn't take me up on that one.
I had feelings about things. What time it was or a feeling of uneasiness before something bad happened. I dreamed of my father passing the hour it happened. He was in the hospital and I at a friend's house. The next day I just knew, but I passed it off as being worried. I went to the hospital and was told he had died but was on life support. I went home with friends, I felt (in my gut) sick because I knew he was going. He died that night. I was 12.
I would have feelings when I was younger of energy. Moving energy. Like when you are in a room with people and you close your eyes and you can feel them moving around except with me, my eyes are open and no one is there, just moving energy. This has occurred in several areas. Not a paranoid feeling like someone watching but just like someone is there moving around. Not threatening. Just gets my attention. Frightened, one time I told my mom, she said tell them to go away. She didn't believe me. But when I would feel, them I would and they would go away. Still, I felt them.
Things happened off and on for a while. Then I got married. Didn't tell the hubbie. Who would. He is wonderful but a very grounded boy next door. Doesn't believe in it or at least my part. We moved to a house a couple of years ago and then all of a sudden my senses where heightened. Energy in the house, the house felt heavy. I began to notice after a year of living there I could tell a difference in a house that felt heavy and one that felt light. I was feeling energies again, except each one had a different feel and there where four that I knew of. I only saw a shadow once while pregnant and it scared the hell out of me. After that, I never saw anything. I guess they felt bad or something. However, they found ways of saying hi. Blinking lights or messing with a digital clock on my cable box. We moved 8 months ago due to being military. Our new home is what I feel like as open or light. In the old house it felt enclosed, our new home is like you're in a field.
I dreamed of my step-father passing away the night before it happened. While touring a historical home in new england, I felt shivers all over my body like being cold but not feeling cold when entering the home. While standing in one of the rooms, I began to feel a dull pain in the back of my neck. A few minute later the guide told us someone died to one blow to the back of the head in that room. The house, by the way, felt heavy.
I just don't know what to make of it. There are a lot more things that have happened. Like feeling others emotions or I can usually sense what kind of person you are immediately when meeting you. I am not upset by it, but I feel there is some reason I am supposed to be aware. However, I have no one to talk to and I just keep feeling these things.
Sometimes I think what if I have lost my mind. When you become aware so much, what do you do? What comes next?