"Vibing" is the only explanation I have of what I feel in certain situations. When I smoke marijuana I feel really silenced and I can think clearly, and with that I feel I can control my surroundings. When I say "control" I don't mean make things move, it's more of just thinking about it and to my satisfaction it happens, it's honestly quiet exhilarating and I can definitely consider it fun if done right. These indications have happen very strongly in recent months and why I'm looking for what it is that can help me with this. Ever since I watched the TV show Lucifer I guess my so called "power" has increased. There are some moments where I like to think I am the good ol' Lucifer Morningstar himself and when I do I can feel channeled. Please don't be alarmed its not evil, I like the character Lucifer Morningstar in the TV show and how he interacts at parties, I relate to that aspect of the show.
The word vibing is the only word I can think of, it's almost as if when I'm trying to "activate my power" there is a slight sensation like my whole body is vibrating but focused in my head and then from there I can do what I please with that "energy". Drinking and smoking together I feel increase my "powers" but I haven't tested it enough. One recent occurrence that happened, for example, my friend had a birthday party so I decided to take it amongst myself to start testing some stuff. At one point in time I was at a table with some friends and mutual friends alike and the game "Rock, Paper, Scissors" was brought up, either to settle a difference or for fun I'm not sure but this was a shinning opportunity. Here's where it gets fun and what convinced me to do some research, I jumped right in the game and at first thought "what if everyone threw paper.", and just like it was scripted as I threw my paper everyone did too. Great! Everyone was laughing and it was funny because we all threw paper. Now then, the second turn is coming up and now I think, "throw paper". (I am willingly trying to control the situation.) as the second turn came almost everyone threw paper except for my closest friend, I didn't think anything of it because I'm not trying to influence him but his remark is what turned my suspicions higher. As everyone threw paper he said, "c'mon man why'd you do it", but not to me but to everyone at the table. I brush that off as the third round is coming up and again I think "throw paper" but this time everyone throws scissors except me and one of my other friends that I've talked to in private a little about this (different story/experience). After, he was hassled for it but I changed the subject.
I do have more experiences but this was one of the big ones that I thought was interesting, I've thought about this really deeply trying to think about everything rationally and from a skeptic view, but if this is the real deal then I would like to further develop this and learn some new things along the way. There are other traits but ill mention them in later posts.
We are still hanging out and waiting to go to the party so as we smoke we listen to music. We've always listened to music and when we do in my state I like to think as myself as a catalyst to the music. As the music flows through me I can manipulate it and resonate it out to the people around me. Some song triggered a certain vibe and as I do, I radiated what's going on within me.
As the night went on a song came on and I was watching a video of a game I recorded that I played (For Honor). Both what I was watching and the music made me feel good so as the song went on I started to do my "catalyst" thing.
As moments went by I looked up from the video on my phone and saw a mutual friend praying and I had the sense it was towards me, as in forgive him for associating with me or protect him from me, I'm not sure but it was definitely a thing involving me. As I noticed, others noticed that I noticed and just tried to carry on and change the whole scene fast.
As I said before I kind of resonate with Lucifer Morningstar from the show Lucifer, and after that incident with the praying I just couldn't stop feeling like the two were connected.