At a very young age I knew something was wrong with me when I woke up in the night after my grandmother passed away and heard God calling me.
He said, "Nicole"
I ignored him.
Again he called, "Nicole"
I ignored him again.
Again he said, "Nicole".
I shot up in bed and called back "God"?
Later when I was a teenager I had an older friend who I delivered lunch trays to in the nursing home my mother worked for.
I'd gone to see her once in a while but my visits became infrequent and I wished I could get off my bum and go to see her.
She came down with many colds and one day she had pneumonia again.
I stood at the bottom of the staircase as my mother came through the hall. "I think I am going to go see Dawn tomorrow." I called after her.
"Nicky I don't think that is such a good idea." Mom replied.
A sunken feeling came across me and my stomach felt sickly. "Why?"
"Dawn is in the hospital." Mom explained.
"Dawn is going to die." I said aloud.
"Don't be silly Dawn isn't going to die."
9:00 the next morning, Dawn passed away at Hackley Hospital in Muskegon Michigan USA. I never got to say goodbye.
Within 7 days I found myself sitting in the pew at the church listening to the sermon about how she loved the color yellow, and how it was such a happy color. I hated the color yellow. I vowed to stop cracking my knuckles and to finish my book that I'd been reading her ever since I'd known her. I didn't ever stop cracking them, but I am still working on my book twenty years later.
I don't want to admit that I am a medium, even though it's been pointed out to me before by people in my life. I don't want to listen to God when he speaks to me because I find it rather annoying.
I know he has a message or plan for me but it makes me angry to think that I might be different.
My family thinks I am a freak.
Nicole Spence 31 years old