So basically, I've been seeing things that aren't there for everyone for just about as long as I can remember, but only out of the corners of my eyes and that kind of thing. It was just kind of an inevitable part of life for me, and wasn't particularly unsettling and didn't interfere with my everyday life. It was just like getting the hiccups: irritating at times, but unavoidable and normal. But when I hit adolescence, everything changed. Suddenly, it wasn't just the corners of my eyes: these people were everywhere, and they weren't even like the unclear, spirit-type entities. Sometimes, I would just sort of feel them there. I get a sort of shivery sensation in my spine, then I get an emotion. By "getting an emotion" I mean, not experiencing it, but just like, knowing what it is.
I'm not too good at describing it, you'll have to forgive me. But other times, these people are all too real: I can see an actual figure, standing there, looking at me. I feel like they know I can see them, and for that, they target me. For instance, in the 1980s, a boy shot himself in my high school cafeteria. I've felt him on a couple of occasions, mostly when I stop in there after school to get something to eat and I'm alone.
I guess my main reason for posting here is to ask for some guidance: I can't control this ability AT ALL. Is there any way for me to control how much I see, or will I always have to deal with this amount of extra stimuli? I'm now seventeen years old, and I'm going to college in a year: the last thing that I want is to be seen as a freak. At the very least, I want to get a handle on whatever the heck I am: this is the first time I am actually doing any research or posting on a board for advice. Any guidance you'd like to provide would be appreciated. Thanks for reading!