People already think I'm a freak. It's overwhelming & sometimes embarrassing. It has, at times, crippled me from being the person I want to be. It's not always bad. I've learned to use it but lack understanding about it. I call it my alarm or my "spidey senses". I pick up vibes from people, can look at pictures & sense the darkness, I know what they are thinking at times & I hear voices when I'm falling asleep. I see things. Been awaken at night & I feel they wake me to inform me. Once awake I immediately know what is going on, why they were here. Having all this going on is hard because I'm a mom of five. I've been mean to my sweetie lately & have been very rude to him. I can't tell him why. It's an invasion of his privacy. This irritates me. Why can't I shut out the vibes when I need to? When I think about it I wouldn't want anyone in my own private business. I can't shake it, I try to run from it. How do you go about being in a relationship when you know something & they think you have no clue? Is it an invasion of privacy? The vibes are so strong at times it's almost like I can see them. Like the vibes are waves & I literally get sick from the motion of them. Big & strong sometimes like an ocean would move in a storm. I had to walk out of the house yesterday because of them. I don't call myself psychic but some do. My sister & father are the same way as my grandmother, dad's mom. Does anyone know of a practice to put in place when I don't want to know things? I'm not sure if it even matters because these vibes can break anything down when they are strong enough. The voices at night can be scary too. I get some pretty nasty things trying to come through so I REALLY try & shut down. It's kind of like I'm in a room with a lot of people talking to me at once. I'm in the middle of the room & they surround me so the voices are coming from every angle. If anyone can give me some advice what to do I'd appreciate it. I know this thing of mine is not going anywhere. I just wish I had help mastering it so I can live in peace during the times when they are the strongest. When it gets like that I'm a frantic mess & can barely function. This past week into the weekend my spidy senses were haywire & full alert. I hate when they get crazy on me like that!
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