I want to keep this brief, as I'm looking for answers. I need to know if I'm going through the beginning stages of a neurological condition, or if I'm actually having genuine psychic experiences. It's gotten to the point where I'm starting to become afraid.
This all started with my grandmother's death in early January, which is why it makes me think that this might be my mind's way of coping with a traumatic event. We hadn't been particularly close in a very long time, but I did feel a great amount of love for her. We saw each other maybe once a year, as she lived in another state. But I did speak to her on her birthday a few days previous to her death, if that gives you any indication of our relationship. I didn't handle her passing very well. It affected my schooling a good bit. And in the past few months, I'm starting to experience things in a very odd way.
I've done tarot readings for my mom for a long time. We both sort of love the novelty element of it, and we've always been sort of keen on the psychic world. They were never really right, they were just sort of vague enough to be fun. I've done them for her recently, and they've actually been bizarrely spot on. I did another for my (living) grandmother, a Methodist pastor, and my accuracy frightened her a bit. I used the cards again, and they told me (in so many words) that my sister was going into early labor, with some kind of reference. And like clockwork, my Godchild was born on the morning after the largest full moon in recent history, two weeks early. I chucked this up as a coincidence, as I've always found more logic in myself than psychic energy would allow.
I've recently started feeling an unusual sensation in my hands, arms, and abdomen whenever I hold a deck of tarot cards or fiddle with rocks in my local New Age shop. It's a warm, tingly feeling. My arms feel light, but my nerve endings are like, electrified. I can't explain it any other way. When I started feeling all of this, I began to wonder if this was more than just something.
That's where it starts to get strange.
My roommate told me that I woke her from her sleep a couple nights ago. When she asked me what was wrong, I pointed up at the ceiling, eyes wide open, trying to tell her something. She couldn't make out all the words; she explained that I sounded incoherent. When she asked again what I was pointing at, I apparently said something to the equivalent of "do you see that"? She told me I went back to sleep shortly after, and she did too. I had apparently done something similar for several nights, she had just never thought to tell me. This could be chucked up to the fact that mother also experiences hypnagogic hallucinations, and frequently wakes my father up with rantings of spiders, people breaking in, etc. She never remembers them either, but my father always tells her about them the next day.
Last night, the experience escalated.
I woke up for no real reason, with a figure beside my bed. For some reason, I figured it was my roommate, checking on me to make sure I wasn't talking in my sleep. I rolled over, and asked her if she was having trouble sleeping. She did not answer. I rolled back over, and the figure was gone. I went down stairs, where my roommate was sitting on the couch. I asked what she was doing down there, and she said she couldn't sleep. This morning I asked her if she had been standing beside my bed last night. She gave me a strange look before telling me that no, she had not.
I assumed that it was her, as there was no one else in the house. However, the fact that I saw a figure, standing no more than two feet away from me, horrifies me. I have no idea if this figure was female, male, etc. It stood about 5'3, and was just solid black. Like someone in a dark room typically looks. I'm not bothered during the day, but in that moment, I am absolutely positive that I was fully conscious. I know I was.
The last thing I suppose I should disclose is that my grandmother (deceased) always did seem to have similar things happen? Not figures beside her bed, but she would just be a very good guesser, if that's even a word. She would just seem to know things. When she did pass on, that's when things like the story above began to occur. Finally, my mother called me the other night, to inform me that my grandmother's house had been rented out. I asked her why she was telling me that, and she explained it was because a small child lived in the house now, and that for three nights he had been woken up by a small old woman walking through the house.
Am I experiencing something here? Do I need to see a doctor? Is this my grandmother's doing? Did she (could she) pass her gift to me? If I am having a genuine experience, where do I go from here?
All advice is welcome and needed.