First, I'd like to point out that I cannot see spirits. I have never been able to like my grandmother, and I've stated it in my first story post that I only see glimpses through mirrors. As a result, my feeling senses are very strong to the point that I can feel footsteps of every living and dead being in the house.
I am terrified of spirits, and yes I was told that I shouldn't be, but I am.
Recently I had found out that my family has dealt with Black Magick for centuries, specifically Necromancy. That is to say my mother believes certain spirits follow us down from generation to generation.
I am always feeling a certain spirit especially in my room and this is fairly new. Typically I'd feel a few different ones here and there and they'd come and go, but I feel one so strong now in my bedroom I don't know what to do.
I pray before I go to sleep, and usually I light candles. Every night now, when I light the candles, right when I blow the match out all of the flames go out and my mirror in my bedroom rattles. I have been so afraid, and I don't know what to do. I don't even turn off the lights anymore because I want to be more aware of my surroundings.
My closet door moves a lot now, the whole experience is terrifying me. I've always had bad experiences when contacting the dead, except now I'm not even trying to anymore and one has come to me instead.
I hate being so fearful. Just like what happened with my grandmother, I'm so scared this spirit is going to latch onto me.
I have decided to follow in family footsteps regarding Magick, so I am beginning my learning in Green Witchcraft. I've forbidden Spirit Magick at this point because I don't know what will happen to me if I try to communicate with the dead.
Normally if I tried car alarms would erupt and mirrors would break, but now I feel like I accidentally invited a spirit into the house. I can literally hear it when I'm alone trying to sleep at night. I don't know what it wants from me, but I want it gone.
I've been on a mission to try to learn all the Mediums in my family. My grandmother is a very powerful one while some aunts and uncles are weak. However my cousin is a bit like me. He can hear and feel them too and they've been sabotaging his life as of late.
I know I've been told this isn't a curse, but I need to know what is happening. Has my family attracted cruel and evil spirits or is this due to inexperience and lack of control?
Some people find it cool to be a Medium or enjoy it, but I don't like it at all.
I don't like hearing and feeling things I cannot see. I am terrified.