First Meeting With The Unknow Black Spirit

I know people here are used to that kind of story, to the point nothing is surprising anymore, but I don't know what to think anymore.

I don't know what is dream and reality anymore. And I don't know if what is happening to me is a gift or simply a curse.

I'll start at the beginning.

When I was something like 10 or 11, we moved in a new house. The first time I saw the house, I didn't like it. There was something about it that just scared me, really scared me. My mother gave me the room that was at the end of the house; the one connecting to our garden. I didn't have any problems with the door that was going to the garden, not at all. What was scaring me was the room.

I always was a really clumsy person, always falling and having accidents. I fell from a roof, I went into a coma, I got beat up, I had car accident and I have a fragile heart. You can say that I have very bad luck.

I couldn't sleep in that room, not without the lights off, for some reason, I never was scared of the dark before that. I had a lamp, I think it was green, or red, which was always on next to my bed. That night, I couldn't sleep, like always, but this time I was feeling very anxious for some reason. My bed was in the corner of my room and I had a direct view of the door, which was always open. I couldn't sleep at all, I could even close my eyes, if I tried, it didn't last more then 5 seconds, I was just too scared. I was feeling like someone was watching me and every of my movement, waiting for me to let my guard down, ready to attack.

I don't know when or how it happened but at a moment I felt a pain in my heart and I looked at the door, something was there. I don't know if it was someone, or something, but it was there, I know that. It was watching me, peeping in my room, a hand on my wall. I couldn't see the details as it was too dark for that, but I knew just by looking that it wasn't human. The fingers were long, very long and looked sharp. I couldn't take my eyes off of it. It was watching me and I was also watching it. Then, I told myself that it was just impossible, that I was dream, I HAD to be dreaming. So I got up, gathering all my courage, and I walked to the door. I lifted my hand to touch it and I was something like a meter away from it, and I tried to touch it. Then, it jumped on me, and I blacked out. The last thing I remember is being held on the floor, the thing's face really close to mine, strangling me. I woke up in the morning on the floor with nails mark on my arm. I tried to tell my mother about it or my brother but they all though I was only dreaming. I couldn't show them the mark.

After that day, I started feeling, hearing and seeing things.

Basically, I learned that I am a high level empath. I sense people's moods and feelings, as places, animals and objects. I can connect with people who died, I don't know how, I just do. I can't sleep normal anymore. I had insomnia the first years but then I got used to sleeping only 3 or 4 hours without pills. I basically always have nightmares. I dream about a lot of things, but it's always nightmares.

I don't know what happened that night or why. I just know that my life changed after that night. I never got into accidents after that, or actually got sick. But I know I turned a cold and started to hate being around people, realizing I knew what they were truly feeling and sometimes thinking. I know that I suppress people's painful feelings just by being there, actually, I absorb them. I dream about them after.

If anyone as a story like mine, please help me. I don't know what I can do. It's hard to live with constantly feelings people's pain.