At a young age, I found that I could direct the wind by concentrating and visualization. I was not aware that I was using aerokinesis at the time, and merely thought it a coincidence. A few years went by with me unaware of elements. I am now 14 and have realized that I can easily direct the wind at will. However, my mother is completely against me training to become a psychic, and said that the Lord forbids such "malign" practices.
Talking to her is getting me no where, so for the past 2 years I have been secretly training to be an exceptional psychic. I'm worried that my subconscious mind will disagree of my actions behind her back.
Whenever she finds a sheet of paper that I put instructions on how to meditate or methods to train my psychic abilities, she always tears it up in front of me and gives me a lecture about how it is unholy to be involved in stuff such as this. She does random raids on my room to check and see if I have been following up on my training, and it's getting harder and harder to train my mind if she is always tearing up the instructions that I print off of websites.
Lately she's been putting blocks on my computer at home and is monitoring the contents of the sites that I go to online. (I am using a different computer to get access to this site). If she keeps doing stuff like this, I'm worried that I might get upset to the point of doing something that I will regret in the future.
I am known to have anger "issues", and the only thing that can calm me is meditation. Rarely do I have these issues, but when I do they cause a lot of damage. I got in major trouble at my school once for breaking down a door when a girl who had been calling me names and taunting me had locked herself in. (No, it was not one of those big heavy doors. It was a one of those cheap doors that schools get to save money.) It wasn't her fault really; I just get a lot of anger bottled up in me over time.
When I was searching on the internet on how to calm myself after an explosion of anger (counting to ten does not work for me...) I found a site that suggested meditation. From meditation sites I went on to other sites that encourage the learning of inner peace, and I eventually found wonderful websites such as this one. When I am doing a training session with myself, it just feels like it's the right thing to be doing. (You understand me on this one, right?) After several days of meditating, I no longer had any problems with my anger. So I started getting into other stuff, and I have re-awakened my mind to a higher awareness.
Back to the main problem though, my mom is still strongly objective of my training to become a Psychic, everyone around me thinks I am weird and I haven't met anyone who is interested in training to be a psychic like I want to do.
So should I ignore my mother's instructions to stop training to become a psychic, or do what she wants me to?