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I Have Always Known

 

My name is Susan and I have an ongoing story. It is ongoing because I still live this way, what I am about to tell you, today.

I was four when I gotten hit by a car in a city. That's when I started to really remember things. I was five when someone starting talking to me and I knew was not an imaginary friend. I then learned about God before I went to church at age seven. I believe it was God but the talking didn't stay. My mom had me checked out for mental conditions only for me to pass every one with flying colors. I also knew everything before it would happen. I knew if my parents were fighting while I was in school and knew they still would be when I'd get home with knowing what it was about.

Over time I knew about people's past and future by just talking to them. I knew if they were hiding secrets and what they were. I can always sense their feeling and know things I shouldn't.

Now I am an adult I know my own future as well as everyone else's. Past and present, why I was given this gift I don't know. I hate it and want to be normal. I know who is calling or about to knock and even what they want. I answer questions before even asked. I don't know what it is just that I have no reason to know why I have this "gift" and what it is for. I do know the closer to God I am the worse it gets. Religion has scared me because of it. I freak out my boyfriend when I always answer things I have no way of knowing or when people go to call him and I tell him everything.

Half the time I don't realize that person didn't ask me the question yet, I heard them ask it regardless. Or comment back about what they haven't commented on yet but was about to.

I cannot help that I do this and half the time I don't even realize I do this until it is too late and the people I am talking to are freaked out. Preachers do not believe me about what I can do and they ask me to leave when I ask for advice. One church said I was possessed with demons and continued to say there is no such thing as a gift like that. Other people will say that it is more than one gift and that is impossible!

Please help with advise, I am lost. I am 28 tomorrow and need leading. Thank you for reading.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, AlwaysKnown, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-05-04)
psychic_randy

Thank you for the wonderful advice. Yes, it is a big part of me and I would probably feel a hole with out it. It is hard not to let peoples words hurt you when you are sensitive about it.:/ However I am making it through and all of you on here are making me feel like I am no longer alone. I feel more secure every day knowing that there is other people out there having the same issues or worse than me!

Susan
psychic_randy (19 posts)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-30)
I might have an idea on how to control your ability. Make a psychic shield. Use it to limit the amount of information that comes to you. If you wanted you could stop the flow all together. Personally I don't recommend stopping the flow because there are going to be times when you are going to need it. I hope this helps. And also, don't let someone who doesn't understand your ability tell you if it's "right or wrong" or "good or evil." It's not their place. The ability is a part of you. Letting them tell you about it when they don't understand is like them taking that part of you away. Don't let them hurt you. Nothing can hurt you unless you let it.
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-30)
j-torrez,

Thank you. You will be hearing from me in a day or so. 😊
j-torrez (3 stories) (53 posts)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-30)
Well if you ever need to talk about anything you can just e-mail me at janet_7673 [at] live.com I would be more than glad to hear what you have to say and try to answer any questions you might have.
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-30)
j-torrez,

Wow, you hit the nail on the head! That is exactly it. I used to be able to handle it better when I was close to God until I felt he and my gift wanted to take it to the next level. Then, of course, I got freaked out and ran. I did not want some thing I am scared of to be a new part of my "gift". You know?

It is so nice to have this support group online! Thank you so much for sharing and the kind words! I need them, so thank you!

😊

Susan!
j-torrez (3 stories) (53 posts)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-29)
I use to do the same thing to and people would freak out. I also had friends who could do the same thing and we enjoyed answering each other's questions and getting answers without ever asking a thing. I confused people who were tried to overhear our conversation. Especially since one would start to say something not finish and then the other would just say the last few words. I miss doing that with them.

After a while I to reach that face of complete confusion, it was an extremely frustrating time in my life. I did not know which way was up or which was down. Seriously the only thing that helped me through it was knowing my priorities and what I believed to be right and always sticking to them despite what came my way. So many times I wished to settle for less and just be like everyone else. Yet, I must say I am glad to be who I am.

Though, I did tone it down a bit. I do not always blurt out what it is I need to say, but rather get to know the person an bit more do some proving and find an appropriate time to say things. At first it is hard because like you said you can't tell the difference since you are use to it, but you will eventually get it. It actually works out better for everyone. People still freak out about it but not as much and seem to be more understanding of what I can do. Meaning I am not persecuted for having these abilities and they do not run away or fear me and sometimes open up to me a bit more. I believe these abilities were given to us so we can help people understand who they really are and become better people, so we can help them in their time of fear, pain and confusion.

It must be awful to have a problem with the church. I never had one I had more of a problem with my parents. In fact they brought it up to the pastor and the elders because of their fear of like you said that I may be possessed, the elders prayed for me and told them that there was nothing wrong and that it was a gift from God. This one time the pastor's son who is now a minister and knowing nothing of what I could do was praying for the people. He came up to me and began to pray then out of nowhere he began to speak and said, "You can see things, hear them and feel them. You can see people for what they are and have visions of the future. You are a mighty woman and will do many great things. People have feared you for this gift but it is also because of this gift of light within you that they are drawn to you." I believe it might be the same for you and don't give up on this. It will be hard and all but it is your calling and you are strong and not just anyone could do what you yourself are and will be able to do. God bless you and good luck!
😉
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-29)
Nancy,

Wow that sounds scary. I wouldn't want to hear my name all the time! Have you concidered answering the voice? Just a question.:)

I hope you can grow out of fear like me, I am with you on letting it get to me. & hopefully your gift will show its self more!

Susan...
ngama30 (3 stories) (15 posts)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-28)
Hey Susan,

Lets see what can I say about my abilities, well I'm not strong like a lot of people in here. Let me see, I could hear my boyfriends thought from time to time, I see spirits in my dreams (most of the time past family members) and well when I'm walking around I could hear someone calling my name or when I'm like in a zombie zone when I'm half asleep and half awake, I hear my name being called. I love to meditate, when I meditate I see pictures pop into my mind. They last like 2 seconds not enough for me too inspect it right. I am a very, very scary cat 😳 I'm certainly not able to sleep without the light on or the t.v., which sucks a lot.

Anne,

WOW, you are really inpiring me to love more and to face my fears. One thing that has always scared me is something popping up all of a sudden like a spirit.

It's nice sharing ❤,

Nancy
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
Anne,

I fully agree, it is good you made it all the way! Congrats! Myabe someday I will be all the way to. I know I can do more just to fearful of what can happen. I don't do much exploring and I should. I hope you stay safe and maybe you can come visit me lol. I know, I won't be able to see you. Just a nice thought lol.

Susan!
AnneV (4 stories) (1036 posts) mod
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
One must move beyond fear to be advanced. It's just that simple. And trust me, it took years. I got so sick and tired of my fear sabotaging my efforts that I started to stand up to them. And guess what, I am fine. Fear blocks ALL areas of our life! This is what causes anxiety, illness, failed relationship and loss. The person who conquers fear conquers life. You cannot do advanced things with fear because all advanced things are scary. Try going into the outer orbit of earth. That is not only initially terrifying but guess what, you're alone! NO ONE is with you. Souls are busy sleeping unconsciously back on earth. Billions of them. I even tried taking friends and loved ones along but to no avail. They were simply too unconscious or their fear sent them immediately back to their body. I walk a solitary course.

I am now at a level that most people cannot comprehend so I generally don't even bother sharing it but once you move beyond fear then all that is left is love. I read on a daily basis here of all the fear that people go through (and it's all understandable) but I took this love to a level that even "demons or evil beings" don't faze me. In fact, I send them such unconditional love that they immediately morph into something positive. All evil is is just love disguised. We have to have the dark to recognize the light or otherwise life would be like reading white chalk on a white chalk board. This is the secret. I remember back in the day, fighting evil in the astral and one time it easily slipped from my fighting grasp and just said, "The only role I have is to teach you love." Wow, I really got it. That is primarily why we are here.

I would not have married (or stay with) my husband if he wasn't supportive. He's actually quite the gifted remote viewer but has no interest other than finding it amusing.

Best to you.
Anne
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
Anne!

WOW, holy crap! SCARY! I would be too freaked out to try lol. You are strong minded and it is great that your husband supports you in it, atleast it sounds he does.:)

What a dangerous and interesting gift! How can you handle it? I would be scared out of my mind!
AnneV (4 stories) (1036 posts) mod
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
Thank you Susan. Here's a tad about myself.

I like to astral project myself. I got bored very quickly of looking around my room or the neighborhood and did things like going to the moon (saw an underground base there if you can believe it), have seen a planet that was not earth that I felt was my real home (probably some prior incarnation). I took remote viewing classes and had the amazing experience of bi-locating to a target that was just given to me as a number (blind target). It was Stonehenge and when I bi-located, I was literally there in consciousness. I astral projected, time travelled, and asked to see the daily lottery. They were the right numbers and in the right order 😊 I think stories of old had some truth to them. For example, prior to the lottery incident, I was meditating and my third eye opened up and a gnome appeared. He said, "Look at the lottery for seven days and it will be like looking at paper." It was the seventh day that I astral projected and saw the numbers. I've also seen higher astral planes that make earth seem like a dark dank dungeon in comparison. I also in my remote viewing and astral travels can say that mankind is not alone and that ETs are observing us. On a related note, I sent out a telepathic message to any receptive ET that I would like to make contact (though my suspicion is that it's already occurred). My husband installed motion detectors in our bedroom so that I can see when I get up in the middle of the night. I awoke a night or two after that invitation to a sound I had actually heard numerous times before (a buzzing type frequency), and I saw the motion detector had gone off. When I looked over to the light, a grey alien was standing there, much to my amazement. I tried to wake my husband up but it just shut my vision down.

Then there are the typical prophetic dreams (some are rather concerning and pertain to earth changes, I think we're in for some serious upheaval in the near future). I've met my deceased loved ones, and know that after we die, and if we are good humans, our afterlife is marvelous. Death is nothing to fear. Earth is difficult because it's a schoolroom and this is often thought of as "first grade" spiritually because of man's incessant desire for war and our ongoing ecological devastation due to greed. But then teachers come along as do healers and true leaders and more become enlightened. Anyway, that's a bit about myself and my "gifts".

Anne
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
Anne,
Your such a delight! Thank you, I will look at them!

Ngama30,
Yes it is, thank you!

This is a great support system that I have and I have all of you to thank!

Do tell me about yourselves and your "gifts" please?
ngama30 (3 stories) (15 posts)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
Hi Susan, If I understood right, today you turn 28yrs.

Well hun, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Hope all your wishes come true, remember like Anne said, this isn't a curse nor a gift. First and far most Love yourself, enjoy it and embrace it. Hope your journey is full of blessings and love.

❤,

Nancy G
AnneV (4 stories) (1036 posts) mod
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
Susan, I love cemeteries too! I have another personal webpage where I've posted my cemetery shots from various places such as Australia and various parts of the U.S. I have some from Britain from a recent trip but I've not uploaded them. Check it out: http://www.eclecticraven.com/pictures/cemeteries.php

My experiences are pretty vast which is why I created this webpage, my astral one (www.astralvoyage.com), my ghost site (www.yourghoststories.com), my spiritual site (www.spiritual-experiences.com), interviews: http://www.theartofastralprojection.com/blog/interview-with-anne-moss, Remote viewing, you name it. I also created a book called Creating Your Reality. If you want a copy in pdf format (for free) just shoot me an e-mail at eclecticraven-at-yahoo.com.

Of course we care when we are called names. I don't blame you for not liking that. But at least you always have a home here with like-minded and nice people.

Have you considered taking classes to take your ability to the next level? I took classes from Pam Coronado and she's awesome. Talk about a caring group of people! And she does remote viewing and psychic medium work on a professional level. If you were really good, I'm sure she'd be delighted to loop you in on cases. She even does tv shows so her skill level is exceptional. Who knows, this could be your new calling in life!

I hope you have a wonderful day. We're actually getting some sunshine here in rainy Seattle!

Anne
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
For all who comment,

Please bare with me for the simple fact I do not get emails stating that someone commented on my story.

I do check often...

Thank you!:)

Susan
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
Show_Me,

I try not to read people so easily. It just happens now, like I said to ngama30, I can't control it like I used to.

I do know I have the gift and have for years its just a lot to take in and it is easier to deny it. I used to be able to want more in learning how to use it for better with God. Now I am just freaked out because I feel like the only one. Being on this site is already making me feel a lot better already.

Thank you for the support I really need it. There is a lot more that goes on however I do believe this site wants it in different areas. What I mean is I also have wicked dreams and realize as do a lot of people however I feel, again, alone in this area.

It seems that my whole world is centered around my "gift" because I am always with knowledge of what people are thinking or feeling and even knowledge of what exactly what is goin on. Some times I wish I didn't knew.

I hope I never come across something so serious I need to tell the police but not know how to! I even thought about talking to them, the police, and seeing if I can help in some way after tests being done to prove I have that ability.

Even then I don't know, I just want to be looked at normally. I know deep down that will never happen. How do I except that?

Thank you again,

Susan
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-27)
ngama30,
Thank you for the support, it is very needed. 😊

It has always came to me with out control. I never tried to make is stronger. I hope you can learn more off of yours and if you need any questions answered I will do my best to answer them.

Just keep in mind that even though I have done this for years I am still new at it because I am starting to reject it. Before I knew how to control it and everything and the only question I had was why I had the gift. Now I am lost and have no idea why.

Anyway thanks so much... Feel free to ask away.

Susan
Show_Me (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-26)
I agree with Ngama30, Embrace your gift BUT first you have to acknowledge that you have this gift. Just confirming that you have it takes a lot of load off of you. Then if you want tap into it more you can start by meditating. Meditation helps. Clear your mind. It's hard to keep things inside if it's what you're feeling. If you can refrain from blurting things out, it would be best. And it's not good to read a person without their permission, even if you're talking to them.

In the old days or back then, this ability was known as witchcraft and pretty much the church thought it was evil, black magic, and etc... There are good and bad people with this ability. If you use it for good, good things will come of it and to you. If you use it for bad or evil things, the ability/gift, will be taken away from from you. Most of the time if you are powerful enough you can send evil or bad people who do bad stuff to you to be judged spiritually.

Believe what you want to believe in. You should not worry about people talking about you. You have to have confidence. The number one key point! You will do fine.
ngama30 (3 stories) (15 posts)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-26)
Hi Always known, all I could say is wow. I mean I would love to have your ability. Just like Anne said, there's a lot of us in here that would love to be stronger. I just learned about my abilities about 2 months ago. But they certainly are not as strong as yours. I creep my boyfriend out when I answer him all of a sudden, and he tells me wait I haven't asked you. How do you do that. He's like please don't do that, and I explain to him that I heard him like if he said it out loud. 😁

Any who, I want to say; Embrace it and love it, read into it and teach yourself more about your abilities. You are most certainly NOT cursed.

Well hope you share more of your interesting stories with us, until then.

Blessings and love,
Ngama30 ❤
AlwaysKnown (guest)
 
7 years ago (2012-04-26)
Anne,
Thanks for the advise. I do use it on occasion's by pure accident with people by blurting out things. I do not even know where it comes from. For example, I had a lady who was preaching God to me one time and I blurted a question for her. My question was why do you preach when you do not think he will come back for us in your belief of the Rapture? She was stunned and asked how I knew that and started to cry and tell me why she thought that.

I simply told her that I believed God told me to tell her that believing is not seeing it does not work that way. Plus other things.

I have had another lady come up to me and was about to greet me from a friend introducing her and knew she was doing very black magic. With out thinking I told her that practicing black magic will not bring her dead boyfriend back.

She freaked out and demanded to know who told me that and walked away cussing at me saying I was rude.

I do not know how to help people... However sometimes I do it with out knowing it.

Like other things... I LOVE graveyards. Not because they are freaky or anything like that. They are just so relaxing to be in! If I could work in one I would. There is so many things I can not peace together.

I use to think it was a gift from God and felt him use me as a vessel but then the church demanded that it was not the case.

I do believe I want to be normal because I am scared that people will make me the black sheep and call me a fake. Not that I care, however I do care a little.

I will look up the book and read it. :)

So you have the same thing? Please do tell me more about it! I'd love to not feel so alone in this area!

Thanks!

Susan
AnneV (4 stories) (1036 posts) mod
 
7 years ago (2012-04-26)
Susan, your ability is neither a gift nor a curse. It just is. It's your thoughts about it that are either a curse or a gift. You chose how you want to think about this. You don't have to suffer. You can just as easily feel this is a gift (I have this ability and enjoy it). Most people on this site would be thrilled to have it come to them this easily. Life in and of itself is more neutral than we give it credit for. It's our beliefs and thoughts about it that label it otherwise.

You don't have to take this advice but a very great book to help people cope with their limiting or negative thoughts is a book called "Loving What Is" by Byron Katie. It was so instrumental to me in changing how I thought about things happening around and to me. You could free yourself of these limiting beliefs and be much happier. Who knows, you might even gradually move from service to self to service to others and use this in the process. Now how wonderful would that be?

Anne

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