I am an empath without a doubt, I have always been able to feel people's emotions no matter how hard they try to hide them. But there is more, my mother was incredibly psychic. She has dreams and premonitions of peoples deaths before they happen, and they always die no matter what she does to stop it. The last one, was her boy friend about 25 years ago, she had a dream about it and begged him not to leave the house that day, sobbing, but he insisted on running out to pick up a friend, he died in a car crash 15 minutes later. However my mother is christian and said it was of the devil and so she never embraced it and instead rejected it. To my knowledge she no longer has these dreams/feelings. (but no one close has died lately either)
I believe some of this "ability" was passed on to me. (is that even possible?) I don't have dreams at all, just feelings, but they are so strong that they have caused me to come home from work on occasion. The problem is they are never clear and concise. In my heart it feels like a loved one has died, but in reality, it's always just things like, my boyfriend is leaving me and was packing his stuff out of the house, or, my mother got arrested and was in jail ect. Something is always wrong but it's never what I expected. Is there a way to work on this? I would love to embrace this if I could, but it seems I have no control over it whatsoever.
On a side note, I don't know if this comes with being an empath, but I have an uncanny ability to know what people are thinking. I wouldn't call it mind reading, because I can't "hear" their thoughts. I just "know" what they are going to say before they say it, it is very common for me to interrupt people by finishing the question they are asking me and then answering it, because in my mind I know what they are going to ask and it feels like it takes them forever to ask it. I already know the question and answer as soon as they say my name to get my attention to ask me. What it this?
I am also somewhat sensitive. Not a lot though. I can't speak with the dead or anything like that. But I can "sense" them, like I'm being watched. It gives me chills every time and a sense of great fear, so much so that sometimes I'm too scared to even look behind me or move. However, out off all the times I've sensed something, I've only seen two shadow figures, one "white shadow" and an apparition. One time I got this feeling as I was out for a walk at night, just down the street and back, but this is back country so it was basically the woods haha. It was very eerie that night, with the way the wind was blowing on the trees and such. I got the feeling as I walked under a wooden post with a light on it, usually I wouldn't turn around but this time I did, as plain as day, a thick shadow the size of a medium sized dog (like a pug) shot across the street underneath the light post. My eyes watered up from the fear, but I kept walking. I ended up stopping at my friends house when I saw her on the porch, she is wiccan, when I walked up she asked me if I wanted to come in, and then said casually "the spirits are out tonight". I've never been out walking at night since, even though she insisted they were harmless after hearing my story.
On a final note, the energy of other people has a weird effect on me. When around a lot of people like at a mall or festival I'll start to feel ill and uncomfortable, usually get a headache as well. I feel great around a small group of friends, and completely drained and lethargic when alone. I have no idea what this means, if anything at all.
What does all of this mean? There are so many different terms and stuff out there but none off them seem to fit me. I would really like to embrace and improve these "gifts" but it feels like I have no control over any of them. Is that just the luck of the draw? I would love to talk about this with more experienced people and hear what you guys think about it.
Thanks for reading.