Lately I haven't dreamed as much as I did or wake up around 3 am like I have been doing. I also have not felt anything near me or hear anything from what I have believed to be my guide. This is somewhat alarming as I am new to these gifts and as I am 30 I feel I am behind as it is already in understanding them. I am a recent Reiki Practitioner and every since I opened up to these experiences I've had to become accustomed to these gifts and the things I see, hear and sense. With this in mind after my last level and attunement I had been dealing with depression and began to dream more, feel more and see more.
Then I had this dream, which I am still trying to understand that has left a profound effect on me. Every since this dream I have finally begun to accept that my mentors words that perhaps I am a Shaman and I have to accept that and find my purpose and help others. However, it still left me shaken. I have also not have a dream since and feel as though my senses are fogged or being dulled. I really want to understand why and how to correct whatever it is so I can keep practicing and growing. So here is my dream if you could take a read and give me any ideas or suggestions as to what it means or why I my senses have been dulled I would appreciate it.
I had passed out and was dreaming of going out through a door. Then I was suddenly somewhere outside on a street in a neighborhood I don't recognize. I suddenly go the impression I was there for some reason and needed to pay attention so I tried. Then I saw a man start walking by me he handed me a bag like the kind the dentists give you with stuff in it to try out. He nonchalantly handed it to me and then walked by like he didn't even notice me. I had tried to follow him but couldn't. He walked to a group of people and started chatting with them.
Then a car goes by obscuring the view (this is when I couldn't follow) and when I see the group again they had become dogs. So I said ok... I tried walking again towards the dogs but then i'm suddenly in a house and stu is there at his desk. Only it isn't out house. So I notice the bag in my hand finally and decided to take it to the bathroom to put away the samples. I go to the bathroom and open the bag and there isn't samples but instead a piece of paper.
So I took it out to look at it and it appears to be a lotto ticket but it is that old avocado green. I can't tell if it won so I stare at it some more. I noticed it had the next days date 4/18/16. So I'm staring at it like why is it tmw? Then the paper feels and looks weird and I feel something is off, so I put the paper down and look up at the bathroom door and it had changed. It felt the same and looked the same color at the lotto paper so I freaked out and opened the door only to find that there was a wall behind it. I was trapped. So I kept thinking I need to wake up I'm dreaming.
So I wake up in bed next to stu in our bedroom. So I turn to him and try to stir him to tell him I was scared and what happened and he wouldn't quite wake up. I feel so nervous and tired and can barely move and just thought if I can wake him I'll feel better. I even tried scratching him hard to get him to stir and he doesn't appear affected which I find weird. He finally moves closer and keeps telling me it was just a dream and go back to sleep. But I feel it wasn't and then I notice his face looks like a light was shining on it. It was coming from the direction of the floor near the head of the bed so I starting trying to look for the light source and then I turn back to him. His face had changed. It looked like he was starting to refract light and he started moving away from me but kept saying it is fine go back to sleep even as I'm asking why was he changing.
Then he completely disappears but I sense something and see a faint outline of something there. Then it hits me, sleep paralysis. I can't move and I kept freaking out and thinking at the same time. I kept saying I need to wake up, I need to wake up. So I finally did and turn to Stu and slowly tried to, even more tired than I was before. He actually wakes up and I feel sad, scared, weirded out and tired. I tell him what happened.
I try to go back to sleep and can't so I get up and put my mala back on and try laying down. I was finally able to go to sleep and it didn't happen again. But I think in the back of my head I was thinking if I didn't put it on I won't be able to sleep without it happening again.
What do you think?