The story I am about to tell you disturbs me in several ways. I'll explain after the story as well as ask a question or two.
July - 2009
A little girl (8) who is friends with my kids is spending the night. She wakes me up before midnight, crying and complaining of a back ache.
I ask her if she would like me to rub her back, she says yes. As soon as I touched her, I thought, Oh my God! This child has Leukemia! I am very concerned but try not to let on to her that I suspect something is wrong. I start talking to her and asking her questions, like has this happened before? Where exactly does it hurt? And I try to distract her by talking about things she likes to do and about her horses. It doesn't help. All this time I KNOW she has Leukemia, but, how do I know? I try to shrug off this feeling by telling myself, "you know nothing about Leukemia, what are you thinking?" And... "don't curse this child with your negative thoughts" and stuff like that.
I end up calling her mother to come and get her and the when she get's there I want to tell her to take her child to the doctor but I don't. I don't know her well enough that I expect she would listen to me. I mentioned it the next morning to her best friend. She said not to say anything that she would not take kindly to it. So, I didn't say anything. Then... On September 1, 2009 I see her in town. She told me she was taking her daughter to the emergency room 'again' for these "growing pains" she says she knows that it can not be growing pains.
I looked her straight in the face and said "I don't want to scare you but, please, do me a favor and have them check your daughter for Leukemia". I lied and said I had a friend in another state whose daughter had been diagnosed with Leukemia and she had the same pains.
3 days later the mother called me to say they had found the Leukemia. It was not yet in her blood, they had to do a marrow test to find it. She said when she got there, again the doctors tried to pass it off as growing pains but because of what I had said, she insisted they do more tests. Because of my 'intuition?' it was caught in the very early stages which ups her chance of survival.
1) I am not a doctor. When I touched this child, why/how did I KNOW she had Leukemia?
2) If I had told her mother in July, they might never have found it. They barely found it in September. So... Why did I wait when I had such a strong feeling about it in July? Was it because I needed to wait just long enough for it to be able to be detected in the marrow?
3) I am a very new acquaintance to this woman, Why did she listen to me and take the steps needed to diagnose her daughter when she had doctors telling her it was just growing pains?
4) Could I have cursed this child with my initial negative thought about Leukemia? Could her Leukemia be my fault?
5) And if I could have cursed her... How do I 'un-curse' her?
6) If I have the ability to 'know' someone has an ailment, like it seems I did in this case, do/could I also have the ability to heal? And if so, how do I know/learn how to use it?
All of the unknowns surrounding this whole experience are really starting to get to me. I am so afraid for this little girl and I am really upset because I feel like I can't help her.
I had the ability to either detect this or curse her with it, so I feel like I should be able to fix it and make her well. I have prayed and prayed for her.
What should I do now?