The Ghost of Blue
I've had many strange things happening to me my entire life. Ever since I was three or four. I'm fourteen now and nothing has changed except that everything's more common and stronger. Let me explain.
When I was small I could see dead people. Just randomly. Wandering around the streets as though lost, looking at me all the time. I remember being surrounded by horrible nightmares every night and seeing the ghosts in my bedroom every night, normally only up to five, sometimes ten but no more, staring at me.
I never told my parents because I was afraid of how they would react. I would also, after getting out of a shower, always be timid to whipping away the steam on mirrors. Every time I did, it was not my face that stared back. Normally if I blinked and looked back the face would become mine again, but I was always horrified by them.
By the time I was about eight, things changed drastically. As I have said I used to see dead people randomly wandering around the streets, or stores or whatever, but when I hit eight things became more common. Everywhere I looked I saw a dead person, who may have died eighty years ago that was still here, and some would trail after me everywhere I went. Inside movies, my bedroom, different states, everywhere. I was horrified, but learning how to ignore them. My mind could begin to see them as a normal aspect of life. And I was becoming slightly less scared.
My nightmares began to change. Instead of nightmares, tortured ghosts seems to send me visions of their deaths. And what they wanted from me. Normally it was vengeance. But I could never help. They were all visions of people who were murdered or killed in a fire or something. I was not about to go out and kill another human. I couldn't. And as I turned eight, I could better channel seeing my own face in the mirror. Seeing ghosts in mirrors didn't affect me, and except for a few rare occasions, I could channel them out and just see what I wanted. It was comforting to myself, and my sanity.
When I was nine I had a vision of a little girl dying of cancer. She had auburn hair and topaz eyes. Couldn't be more then three. I thought it was a hallucination, but I was wrong. Three weeks later one of my father's co-workers daughters died of cancer. And she was three. And looked just like the girl in my vision. The night of her funeral as I lay in bed I heard crying. A ghost walked out of the shadows carrying a little girl. The girl that had died. For the first time I screamed. It was the first night my parents ran in and made the ghosts go away. I still feel guilty about the child.
When I was ten I had another sorta vision. When I was eight I had met a boy named Kyle. He was just a couple months younger then me. But his father abused him. In his times of need I would help bandage him up and clean away blood and be a shoulder to cry on. I was the only thing holding him up. The ghosts were always restless every time I came home after having seen him at school. Because of the abuse he was normally absent for two or three days a week. No one seemed to care. But one time he was absent for ten days. On the eleventh I had a vision, perhaps premonition? I saw his father shoot his mother, then go after Kyle. I saw myself running, as though in slow motion, to save him, but he opened a window and jumped out. I woke up screaming and sweaty. The next day I got a desperate phone call from him for help. My heart stopped cold. I ran as fast as I could to his house, three streets away, but I was only just in time to see him fall out the window and commit to his own death. Is this perhaps a premonition?
Everything remained the same still until I was about twelve. I started having hallucinations in showers, or pools, or in cars and on bikes I was driving. Sometimes I could feel nails scratching harshly down my back drawing blood, and when I looked I could see dark red scratch lines. Or think I saw dying people walking into the room while I was in a shower.
It tormented me, and still does.
For they have only grown worse. I would also get the sense of someone dead and evil behind me and it would make me catch my breathe or turn me ice cold for several minutes. But when I would look I would never see anything. This was also around the time I started seeing the shadow people. They would seem to be in the corners of my room at night or in the streets staring at me.
Recently, in the last year, everything has gotten stronger. I can hear voices in my head now. I thought I was really alone in all of this. Then I met my boyfriend and best friend, Josh. And he helped me. He can sense ghosts but cannot see them. Also, he can block them. So he's been keeping all ghosts two hundred feet from me, as with their voices not being able to enter my mind. I sleep better and don't feel constantly stared at. And the hallucinations are not near as bad. But I feel like I am denying helping them. They always want help, or vengeance. But this relaxes my own mind. I still see people in the mirrors, or get odd feelings, and have visions.
My most recent one happened not three days ago. I was in the shower, water on burning hot, when I felt an unwanted presence. The next thing was I felt a freezing feeling on my shoulder, and I spun around but saw nothing, just smacked into the door. I freaked out. They were all supposed to be blocked.
All the ghosts.
I grabbed my phone from outside the shower and texted him while the water was still running, not caring because I was so freaked. I asked him if they were all blocked and he said yes. I was still scared, but went back to showering. As I was getting out, I felt a jolt in my head and my eyes grew huge. I saw a quick vision. In it was a girl like me, but her hair was red, eyes emerald, and skin tanned. She was stepping outta the shower too but as she was she slipped and fell into someone. A boyfriend I guessed. He pushed her away. He was angry for some reason. He grabbed a knife and stabbed her seven times, saying it was for her seven big mistakes, and left her to bleed out. Then I saw her in a coffin, at a funeral, the day and year of her death. June 22, 1984. I never died like she did, but I have talked to her in my mind by asking my boyfriend to stop blocking for a while. She's angry, angry at him, the man who killed her, angrier then many that I've met. She wants him to die. What do these visions mean? How do I help?
The problem is that I can never talk back, only listen. I can sometimes get in few and far words, but its so hard for me to reply to anything at all. I'm no medium, just unfortunate. Can you help me? I wish to know what I am, and if you can help, what my boyfriend is. I'm lost and for fourteen years I've dealt. I would like some answers finally. Can you help?