For as long as I can remember I have always lived alongside spirits. As a child, I sensed spirits, saw orbs, and empathed other people's feelings. As I got older, my "gift" became more difficult in that I saw, heard, and felt spirits around me who were not always positive. A shadow man would stand in the corner and stare at me when I tried to go to bed, the covers would pull off me, my bed would come off the floor and vibrate, spoons spun in their bowls, appliances turned off and on, and things were always being moved or thrown. I have been scratched, hair pulled, and have always been plagued by nightmares. Needless to say, none of my friends would come back to my house for sleepovers.
I have also had regular deja vu and always dream, sometimes prophetically. As an adult, I have learned to control my gift more and can use safety measures such as visualization to keep myself and space safer. I still see, hear, and feel spirits. I sometimes empath other people's feelings and hear their thoughts. I still dream prophetically and am now having memories of my past lives. I also communicate, see, and feel family members who have passed over that sometimes come to me in both the waking and dreaming worlds.
My sister has visions but has chosen to ignore this gift as it is too intense and our childhoods were scary because both of us in a house made us magnets for too many spirits and we didn't know how to control it. My gift has been passed down on both my mother's and father's sides. My great-grandmother was a seer for her village while my father's family has the ability to see orbs and has dreams. It seems that this combination has created an intense mix within myself and my sister.
I am writing because I don't know what I should do with this gift. I don't have a mentor, have never trained it in anyway, and am wary of telling other people about it. I know that it is a blessing to have the gift that I have been given but I don't know what to do and how to proceed on my journey of using it to help others including the spirits who are contacting me. I also don't know how to control it very well. If anyone has any advice it would be greatly appreciated because this has been a very long, lonely, and difficult journey.
Thanks in Advance.