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Experiencing Others' Pain Because Of My Own

 

A year ago, I lost my mother suddenly. She was someone who had so much love and was a big part of my life. She was accepting and would listen to my psychic experiences from childhood up to adulthood. Losing her from the realm of the living is the most painful experience I've suffered to this day.

My mother, before her death, had organized a beach vacation for my family, and we knew that she would have wanted us to go, so we went.

Everything was going well, despite our sorrow, wishing my mom could be there with us. We figured out our bedroom placements, and set ourselves up for the week-long vacation.

My problems started once I laid my head down, hoping for a relaxing night of sleep, maybe some happy dreams. I've been a lucid dreamer as long as I can remember, and know when I'm experiencing something that is created within my own mind.

That week, I had two experiences that made me wish I did not have psychic abilities.

My first experience placed me in a hospital. I was in the body of an elderly man and I was in a stretcher, doctors rushing me to surgery, I was slipping in and out of consciousness. When I came to, the doctors were in the middle of performing open heart surgery on me before I passed out again. When I opened my eyes, I was wearing a mask, and I could see the IV. The doctor explained everything and told me that my heart replacement surgery was successful. At that moment I could feel an overwhelming sorrow. My own body had betrayed me. The heart I was born with was gone.

When I woke up in my bed, I had tears running down my face. I could still feel the loss and the sense of betrayal.

The other experience was equally as painful, but I am uncomfortable writing about it because of the nature of the event. I woke up crying to that as well, feeling equally painful emotions, except this time from a young girl.

I want to know if it is normal to have a painful experience like this after going through a traumatic event like the death of a loved one.

And is it normal to have wished I were never psychic after going through this?

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Comments about this clairvoyant experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, AmethystFox, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

PathR (4 stories) (1247 posts)
 
8 years ago (2012-07-26)
Because you have willing opened up to Spirit/psychic abilities in an attempt to connect with loved ones.
The Spirit world does not differentiate with our grief.
It open's when we open!
This in itself has opened you to Channelling.
The effect you are speaking about is experienced
As a Physical Trance Channeling via the dream scape,
When you were in an out of body state known as
Astral projection.

We as humans do not think much about a Guide/Spirit
Helper aligning with our energy.

But when we are the one Aligning: This is the point
That is interesting to experience another person.

Many of us say we are alone. But to acknowledge
Your experience is real proves.
We humans are part of the whole and all is interconnected.

In the Dream scape there are dimensions.
And as Eagleclaw said, he experience, so have I.

For years I've seen a girl assaulted.
The "HighLight", is we can raise our vibrations. We
Can actually interven. The reason being Real Time
Is something that can be manipulated to a positive
Outcome. Secondly we learn compassion
3rd'ly we accompany the individual.
IslVoter (257 posts)
 
8 years ago (2012-07-26)
Amethyst--

I totally understand where you're coming from. Sometimes I just have to hear myself explain in order to realize what I already know!

And, yes, it is good to have people to bounce the thoughts off of.

I'm glad you're feeling better and I look forward to your "happy" stories!

Lora
AmethystFox (1 stories) (4 posts)
 
8 years ago (2012-07-26)
IslVoter~

I tend to work things out while talking to people.

I look back and realize that gaining my human psychic abilities was for the best. I actually had some really good psychic experiences that summer, and I think I'll write about those on another page.

Also, I'm happy to have found such a warm and supporting community for people like me. 😳
IslVoter (257 posts)
 
8 years ago (2012-07-25)
Eagleclaw--

Seems to me you answered your own questions when you said that, after your mother's death you regained your human psychic abilities.

Yes,it couldn't have been comforting to be going through the death experiences of an old man or trauma of a young girl while dealing with your own grief.

But it may have been your own or your mother's way of giving you the "gift" of increased connection. She couldn't take away the pain but she could help you to gain greater connection. She's still caring for you in that wise mother way.

Isle - Lora
BlueMoon01 (1 stories) (14 posts)
 
8 years ago (2012-07-25)
First off, I'm so sorry for the loss of your mom. I have only experienced something like your experience with the old man twice. The first was when my uncle died- I have that story posted on here- and the second was when my friend had some kind of a heart attack while we were in school. I would say it is normal to sometimes resent your abilities after something like that. But I have to tell you, as hard as it is, try not to wish away your gifts. I lost mine for a while after some emotional trauma, and they're still not completely back, but I just felt empty until they started coming back. They're a part of who I am, and after 18 years, I'm finally learning to never wish yourself away. You are beautiful, and I wish you the best. The ones we really love never leave us, and always remember your mother is watching over you ❤ I wish my mother was more like yours, based just on what you said of her, but we all have our own burdens to bear. I wish you the best, and if you'd ever like to talk, feel free to reply and I'll find a way to help.

Love and Light,
Blue
ReikimasterMystic (14 posts)
 
8 years ago (2012-07-25)
Sweet Perfect Child of God,

We don't die! How do I know this 12-17-98 in a NYC hospital I actually left my body. They Od me we don't see with our eyeballs we see with the love in our heart. I was blind but now I see. I am so sorry your Mom isn't there in a physcal form but she is there as your guardian angel. If you would like any other info please just ask.

RMM
AmethystFox (1 stories) (4 posts)
 
8 years ago (2012-07-25)
Eagleclaw,
Thank you. Having to experience that along with my own grieving did not help me. It also didn't help that my close family could not comprehend what I had gone through.
My mom was not psychic, but my one aunt is very sensitive. She's one of the few I can contact after having an experience.
My mom told me that, as a child, I used to talk a lot with my grandfather who had passed away. I would sing songs and say things my grandpa told me. It startled my mom at first, since I was saying things that reminded her of her dad and no one had told me anything about my grandpa.
During the end of elementary school and through middle school I closed myself from the world because I was bullied. My psychic abilities with people were shut off, but I grew closer to animals, plants, and nature.
It wasn't until my mom's death that I regained my human psychic abilities.
And I have had experiences that make me happy to be psychic.
I'm sorry if I write too much, I'm just happy to have discovered that I'm not alone.
Eagleclaw (386 posts)
 
8 years ago (2012-07-25)
Hello,
I am very sorry for the loss of your mom.
What you are experiencing is what I call a "step in". You are taking the brunt of another person's painful experience for them. I have had these for many years. These people are strangers but they all are experiencing these terrible experiences.
Also, Did your mom have psychic abilities as well? Sometimes abilities are passed down to the next person after a person with abilities passes away.
And yes, it is normal to to wish you did not have abilities after an experience like that.
I hoped that I have answered your questions. Take care.

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