I am a paramedic student in my final year of study and have been working as a paramedic now since last November. Over my short time on the road, I have witnessed and seen a mix of terrible and wonderful things including the end and beginning of many different lives.
The reason why I am writing this evening is because I have experienced some strange 'feelings' around particular people that relate specifically to their health. It is hard to explain and I hope I make my message clear, but not understanding this situation has made it difficult to write about.
For starters, whenever on the job I come across a body of someone who has passed away, I can "sense" that they have passed on- before even inspecting them or noticing any obvious signs. It is almost like I cannot 'feel' any energy coming from their body. The way I have explained it before is "I feel like the body is empty, like all that's left of this person is a shell".
These feelings apply to persons who appear obviously deceased and people who look like they could be alive. I'm not having these sensations after feeling they have no pulse and saying to myself "oh he/she is dead so I feel like they are dead". I feel this way before I even establish they have passed on.
I have witnessed some resuscitation attempts and KNEW that the attempts would fail. Reason for this is feeling as though the patient's 'soul' is not there anymore- that they are too far away from their body. I feel like there is nothing inside of them anymore.
This is extremely hard to explain & have yet to come across another paramedic who experiences these feelings.
However, a couple months ago I was working in a retail store for extra money and a lady came into the store and everything about her reminded me of someone who was dead. Her smell, her mouth, her skin. It was her whole being that just alarmed something within me. I felt like she was incredibly unwell or suffering from a terminal illness. It was so strange being around a person who was alive, that just seemed to me as if she was deceased.
I guess I am writing because I'm wondering whether there is an explanation for these feelings. A friend of mine believes that perhaps in a past life I could have been a clairvoyant.
I think what I'm looking for is whether what I'm feeling sounds familiar to someone else out there? These feelings I have do not bother me, I am just curious as to why they occur. Any insight/advise would be really appreciated.