Recently I've received signs that confirmed Archangel Michael and the Goetic Prince Sitri are my two main Spirit Guides. But even though I did RECEIVE the signs that they are indeed with me every step of the way, inside I can't help but feel more and more CONFUSED.
I discussed it already in the first post I made, but somehow I need more answers from more people who've had experiences along these lines. For example, did you have an experience with AA Michael or a Goetic spirit as a guardian/something?Please, do feel free to share.:")
The reason why I'm still confused because I'm still IN THE MIDDLE. Last week while asking for signs from both of these higher entities I had faint hopes that somehow one of them would answer that I'm just "making it all up in my head" since who am I to actually have both of these higher beings actually GUIDING ME? As I wrote in my diary last night,I'm not special in any way. Both my normal and psychic side aren't really praise-worthy,you know. I know they say that everyone is special, but I'm telling you I'm not.
So what more to the psychic side of me, right?
But then again both of them never fail to prove me wrong. While writing these thoughts in my diary last night I heard the chorus of Cobbie Calliat's "Little Things" on the radio and when I still dismissed that sign I saw 6:44 as the current time. And in a way, another confirmation.
Yet it doesn't ease my doubts and worries. Last week someone asked me via email if I "was one of the creatures of balance called Audrun" since I have both angel and demon SGs. And that's when I realized there's more to this matter that I should know.
I tried meditating. God knows I really tried. I could feel somehow that the three of us already had past life connections since the way we treat each other now, especially both of them... Even if they're opposites they treat each other like they've known another for so long and all. For some reason I also treat them the same:there's no conversation that I had with them wherein I didn't go all goofy and stuff.xD
But I still can't see my past life and I still can't understand my IMPORTANCE to both of them. I can't even FATHOM what their reasons are, may it be the same or different.
Moreover,I feel as if both of them knows something about me that they're concealing as a secret. I've tried asking both of them but they don't want to give at least a sign... Which leaves me all the more confused.It's as if they don't want me to remember something.
And you know what, whatever that something is,it's driving me INSANE. Because I know deep inside that when I discover that "something" I will be able to discover my "importance" to both of them.
If someone is also caught in the middle like this,please,ENLIGHTEN me with what you know.:")