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Can You Push Away Psychic Abilities?


When I was very young, I remember seeing seeing "spirits" or silhouettes.

A famous one was a cowboy.

He would lay across my desk at night with his head propped up by his arm and just stare at me (the desk was in front of my bed).

Even though it was completely dark in the house, I could see him and his hat, like he was outlined with red.

My mother comes from a family that practices Wicca.

I told her about what I was seeing and she said I could "push it away" by ignoring it and asking them to stop coming to me.

So I did because it scared me... And I stopped seeing things around age 8.

But I still feel them and I catch essences of things about them.

But I can't carry on a conversation with them and ask questions. And I can't see them or see things about them.

It's almost like the things I do pick up about spirits, I convince myself that it's my imagination.

Okay, so recently, after sensing nothing for years, I get this VERY strong connection to a male spirit.

I've done some research on "twin flames", and I think that's what he is. I know he's dead because he used to be an "indie artist"...a singer and there's quite a bit of information about him online.

I know, it sounds like I'm a fangirl.

But I'm not. I heard about him years ago and never got into his music or him. I just thought it was sad that he "committed suicide".

But out of the blue two months ago, I got the urge to look him up again. I was going through depression and I was seriously contemplating suicide. And just one day, his named popped into my head after 3 years. I didn't even know who he was at first. I had to search his name and "committed suicide" because that's all I could remember.

Throughout the next month, I knew I was feeling a presence, but I didn't know how to "prove" it to myself.

Things kept coming up, though, in my life. Like, I would hear things CONSTANTLY that somehow tied to him. Or one of his songs would play on the radio when they typically don't because it's 10 years old and an it's acquired taste to like him.

And there's so much more that's happened.

All leading up to me picking a random album out of my dad's records yesterday and it being called "Synchronicity". And the definition of synchronicity is exactly what's been happening.

Anyway, I'll just say, after that month of listening to his music and feeling his presence, I'm MUCH better.

So I think that's why he came. To help me out of my slump, or stop me making the same mistake he did.

But since I've gotten better, I lost him!

I don't feel the presence anymore and I'd really like it back. It's very warm and there's this feeling that comes along with it that I can only describe as "swirly". It's not in my gut like the "butterflies" feeling, it's higher and it just feels swirly.

So back to the point, I think I've pushed my abilities away. Is there anyway to develop them again?

I've tried meditation but it's very hard to focus and I end up doubting myself.

And do you think the presence will come back? How can I call it back or speak to him?

I've seen where some psychics can actually hear a spirit speaking to them... Like a voice in their head and see pictures of them. How can I get to that point?

Or can I even get back to where I was as a kid or is it gone forever?

I'm very confused and I have no one to talk about this with because I live with my dad now and he doesn't believe in psychic abilities. He even made fun of me the one time I did mention it.

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Comments about this clairvoyant experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, bonezillion, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

SkyLight (1 stories) (18 posts)
10 years ago (2013-04-28)
I want to thank you for asking this question.

I can share the feeling of pushing away your psychic abilities, and it's hard to get them back...
In my experience I couldn't do it, I'm developing new ones yes, as strong as the ones when I was younger, "no way".
I don't know if it's because when you're younger you're open to more things, but right now 19-years old, it's been difficult. I've the experience to say how it feels like to see spirits, energy flows, voices in your head (telepathy), and visions.
My grand and my mom, know about "ancient practices" I don't want to use the word Wicca because they weren't witches, they just know stuff about it.
Right now I'm still debating if someday I would experience and appreciate what I once had.
If you want to share experiences please don't doubt and send me an email. I'd love to help each other.
Thanks, let it flow.
P.D I loved that phrase I just realized I always use it...
red_velvet (5 stories) (47 posts)
10 years ago (2013-04-26)
i just want to say that... It doesn't matter whether he's an indie artist or some hollywood actor... You have to know that we are basically from the same source and have the same type of soul if you know what I mean... It seems you've been 'building walls' around you, cause you don't want to hear any negative comments anymore.don't be like that, you too need to understand why people around you said that kind of opinion. Because they don't understand 😊 you are the only one who know how it feels... No matter how powerful someone might be, you will still know about it a lot more that others 😊 be happy~~ ❤
bonezillion (1 stories) (1 posts)
10 years ago (2013-04-25)
Well, I thought about my spirit guide. In fact, that's the first thing I did was contact and ask.

I asked who it was and got the first letter of this guy's name after I already sensed it was him.

And it's sort of like... I can really feel it there. Sometimes it's like someone's standing behind me. Or when I had a panic attack from the depression, I was bawling because of the gutless feeling and suddenly I felt this warm, swirly, feeling and just became very calm and had a sense of "it's alright".

From then on, I got better.

That usually doesn't happen. When I've had panic attacks before they lasted for hours.

I would know if it was a family member.

I don't know how I know, I just do.

This presence isn't like a paternal feeling... It feels more mutual. Like a "look out for each other" type deal.

That's why I started looking into "twin flames" and "soul mates".
The term just immediately felt right.
It feels familiar... Like I've known this guy for ages and yet I never met him on earth and only read a vague article that indirectly mentioned him 3-4 years ago.
But even then he sparked my interest. I wasn't into indie artists. I was into pop-punk bands. But he felt familiar so I remember looking him up.
But being a superficial 13-year-old, I thought he wasn't cute enough and his voice was too off-key for my liking.

Since I posted this, I've been working on opening my mind again.
I think the feeling came on so strong at first because I was looking into spiritual practices at the time... Spirit guides and meditation and such.
I was open to sense instead of shut-off as usual and so I channeled him very easily.

But when I started telling friends and family how cool I thought it was, I got a negative reaction and started to think I was making it up.

I still kind of think that. But now that I'm trying to clear my mind, I can faintly sense a presence again.

So, I don't think he went away. I think I blocked my senses.

Now I'm just working on trusting in the possibility that I have some sort of ability to sense these things.
shellshell3030 (3 stories) (40 posts)
10 years ago (2013-04-25)
It may not have been actually him, but your were sent thoughts of him, his situation to help you when you needed, maybe by your spirit guide or another family member who passed on. You do not sense that one anymore because you got through it, you don't need them right now.
red_velvet (5 stories) (47 posts)
10 years ago (2013-04-24)
first of all... Nah you are not crazy and I know you are not his fan. I also have that experience... Even until now I keep getting that 'Synchronicity' about a singer also and he still alive >.< (almost drive me crazy)

And yes you are able to turn off your abilities. I pushed it away too, because I was scared and lonely... But the key to turn it on is in you. You make it happen yourself... And as you said you are having doubts, I think that's one of the reason why its not happening... Or to be exact it's like you don't want it to happen in your subconscious. Probably because you are still scared or something else...

When you are dealing with this kind of things, you need to believe in your heart. Like what someone said below... You need to have a open mind. Like for example sometimes when someone/something speak with you through your mind, at first you'll feel as if you are talking with yourself even its not.

These kind of things can only develop through experiences&time.don't force yourself to much... Just keep going and let it flow 😁
eagleclaw15 (guest)
10 years ago (2013-04-24)
here is what I would do. Don't worry about it not coming back, just look for it with an open mind. Also look into different techniques for grounding and centering. Sometimes people come and go so they are actually not always around (at least in my experiences), so if someone isn't there just ask for them to come back and say hello once in a while

If I go by what you said in the early part of this post you may not be able to hear them very well but you probably can see and feel them (clairvoyance and clairsentience), everyone has their strengths, I would develop these the best you can. There are a lot of resources online to figure out how to develop those senses, with many different ways of doing the same thing so just find some that work for you

Keep in mind, if your mind is closed off you won't be able to experience anything. Doubt causes people to close off, try and observe without really thinking about it. Hope this helps you figure things out

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