I'm sorry for the long post but I need to get this off my chest because no one I know can explain the things that have been happening to me.
Anyway I have this thing I don't know if its a problem exactly or I'm crazy but I think demons visit me in my dreams some times. It's never when something significant in my life has happened, they just come and go. I don't remember much of my childhood but I think I actually knew them and would talk to them. Something you might need to know is I almost wasn't born. Around my mothers third month of carrying me she almost miscarried. I believe that might play into wants been happening. So on with these strange dreams.
This one dream was when I was a young girl in i'd say the 8 th grade. I was sleeping but not dreaming and this still happens often. I was basically seeing nothing when this ram appears and its body is turned away from me but it slowly turns its head and looks me dead in my face wearing a little smirk on its face. Its eyes have a human pupil but the color is something I can't explain. It then disappears just like that no fading.
The next dream is when I was in my freshman year. The dream starts off with me in the tub when I get this feeling and I look over on the floor and there's this reptilian like snake with black hair on its back. I inch my face a bit closer when suddenly the black hair part jumps off of it toward my direction over my head into the ceiling corner behind me. I look up and all I see is this lady with dirty blond hair and dark eyes looking at me. She was beautiful but her hair looked damaged and needed fixing. She had gone all exorcism on me and had her arms and legs touching the wall with her back to me but her head was twisted forward. I get that feeling again and I turn to look back at the floor and I see this pale humanoid figure start picking itself up. It was so pale I saw the veins through its skin and it had no gender that I could tell. Its eyes were black with no white around them and it was bald. I asked it: "who are you? What do you want"? I looked back up at the lady when she replied for him: "he wants you". That's when I look back at it and it takes a step toward me. Throughout this whole time i'm in the tub naked but not scared and so when she gave me that response that's when my emotions started kicking in and I (quite hilariously) hopped out the tub in front of it and bust my sh** on the floor then got up ran for the door where it took a couple of tries to open it like I didn't want to open. Then I ran out into the hallway stratight to my moms door and tried opening it. When that didn't work I tried my own next to it which didn't open either. Meanwhile the wierd dude Is walking out of the bathroom toward me. I suddenly get weak fall to the ground and start calling for my mother but my voice eventually dies out and look up to see its coming closer to me. So I finally get one of those ' h*** no we won't go' moments and shoot my hand in front of myself and everything in front of my hands turns into a blinding white light.
The last dream happened over the weekend (im 16 and in my sophomore year) where I am at my dads house sleeping and I see flashing of things I'm doing then it turns sexual somehow. I don't know why I'm virgin and only 16 so nothin much there. Anyway the guy was on top touching and caressing me through these flashes in time then he looks up at me, nuzzles me or something and I see its face. It look like a rabid demonic dog with red eyes looking at me, and that's when I wake up.
I'm not afraid when I have these dreams and the reason I believe why is because i'm used to them and i'm only afraid of god and myself. I also strongly believe that dreams like these are not new. I don't remember most of my child hood but I have flash backs of me as a little girl standing somewhere with this demon and he's caressing my face and telling me nice things and something so funny I actually laugh and touch the hand that is holding my cheek and smile up at it with something akin to admiration and delight in mu eyes. It flashes to me eating something bloody and squishy while smiling and and looking up at it. However I never saw this demon's face I only see it's hand and forearm which looks pale but healthy and strong.
I don't know exactly what i'm looking for in responses but maybe someone to tell me i'm going to be okay or give me some sort of explanation as why this is happening.