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It's Not A Gift

 

As far back as I can remember, I have been doing what ever I can to learn how to control what some perceive as a gift.

It is not a gift to have the overwhelming feeling of someone's passing, to mourn prematurely for loved ones, or for those I will confirm when the obit is printed.

Its not a gift To be able to say with certainly that " I know if I turn on the tv they will say they found a body, that I will know the who, the how, the when, the why. But I can't explain it. I just know it." I have never been wrong.

It's not a gift to walk into a house and absorb the sadness of the past residents, or to have to work to look past the way the house was 50 years ago because you get stuck in their environment through flashes, of visions.

It's not a gift to tell a coworker selling raffle tickets " no thanks, I'm not getting any tickets today because I'm not going to win. Sell me one tomorrow though, because I'm going to win that one okay?" realizing you just said to much. The next day you buy a single ticket, your odds are against you 850 to 1, and of course you win. Then everyone thinks you some how cheated.

It's not a gift when you tell your coworker to get the phone before it rings. It's frustrating.

.

It was not a gift the day I woke from a nap, asked my husband to hide the gun. Told him that I had a horrible feeling that a teenage boy would be fatally shot in an accident, that the boy was our boys age, that I was emotionally attached in some way, that I would see him dying, that I was helpless and sick because the time was soon coming. The pain was paralyzing. 18 hours later, at about 445 am, my phone rang, a friend on the other end explained that " I'm at the hospital, Michaels been shot in the head, he's not going to make it, you need to get here hurry please, I don't know..." I felt selfish relief, it wasn't my child that took a bullet, but a friend's child instead. Instant relief. Then comes the guilt.

This is me, my life. I know before it happens.

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Comments about this clairvoyant experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Calmingstorm, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

bird (5 stories) (23 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2013-09-03)
I also have to say, that feeling relief that it wasn't your son that was killed is nothing to be ashamed of. It is just human. As a mother, and a person of course you didn't wish it on anyone else. Nor did you not feel sadness and pain that it was your friend's son. Im sure you felt complete anguish. You felt two completely different things. Just because it was about the same event doesn't make you a bad person.
bird (5 stories) (23 posts)
+1
7 years ago (2013-09-03)
It is both a curse and a gift, I will certainly give you that. I think given the choice of having it or not, I would still choose to see the things I see. Why? Because I can't imagine going through life with blinders over my eyes. To be one of these people who has no idea just how connected we are to the universe, to not FEEL in their souls how important life is and everything in it. To not know that to me is tragic. Having abilities has given me that. I will not lie, I have seen HORRIBLE things and known even worse than that. Things I don't wish for anyone to ever have to even imagine. But I have also seen wonderful things, and helped people see good things also. I think my gift makes me the amazing person that I am. It is the way of the universe- you can't have so much good without the other extreme. I personally would not feel complete without the things I have experienced. I wish the negative wasn't soooo bad, but it is the reality of the world. Would you REALLY be ok with ignorance to it? And as an aside, I rather enjoy the knowing who's on the phone, and shocking people by being right about trivial things happening. It keeps life just a little bit interesting:)

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