For a while now, I've been experiencing this weird foreign language thing. The closest I could get to an answer was sleep talking, but I'm wide awake and have expressed actual things through this. I don't know what it is or how it's happening, but it doesn't feel like gibberish. It sounds so foreign but it feels so natural and I'm not sure if I'm just subconsciously creating this thing, or if I'm actually experiencing something real, or if I'm just bonkers because I haven't been able to find any stories about people speaking in a foreign language of some sort while awake.
The first time I've ever experienced this, I was a child, maybe six or seven years old. I was in church and people were talking about "speaking in tongues" and "the language of the lord" and I don't know but I guess I just wanted to feel like I was mature and in the big leagues or something because apparently not a lot of people could do it. I guess stuff just came out of my mouth and the Youth Pastor was like "holy crap she's speaking in tongues" but honestly I was just... Gibberish?
But it didn't feel like anything then and nothing even close to that started happening until a year or two ago when I started tongue-speaking again and this time it actually felt like something. My mom has shouted some incomprehensible words when she's been really, really angry and didn't know how to express her frustrations, but for me, I was completely calm. I just started speaking this thing for no actual reason. I've been really peaceful, sometimes happy, sometimes just really content and I've said this thing.
Sometimes though I'll be really frustrated, like last night. For about an hour and a half it was just pretty constant soul-speak (that's what I've decided to call it) and I knew what I was feeling and what the words were conveying but I didn't - and still don't - know what they meant as individual words. In the two years since this has been happening, I've learned that "aįacį" means yes and "cheyden" means crazy and the only reason I know that is because I was trying to say those words in English but the ss words came out instead.
Has anyone else here experienced this? Please, all I've found is people speaking in their sleep. Am I alone in this? Does anyone know what this is?