This story takes place just last winter. Before I go back there I'd like to say that I come from a family with a strong spiritual connection. Many healers, many with physchic abilities and many with various gifts. My entire life I can remember sitting around tables and listening to professionals like Real Estate Agents, Nurses, Salesmen all talk about their "gifts." They would do it late at night when the family crowds will thin out, as only certain people felt comfortable speak about it openly. Some sounded great and some I did not envy. Never would I have thought that any of those gifts would be passed down to me.
Moving back to last winter, I regularly attend weekly rotary meetings. Every Wednesday morning, bright and early we meet at 7 AM for breakfast and fellowship. I, being in my 30s, am probably one of the youngest rotarians to attend. The majority of our group consists of retired individuals. I love the group regardless, and find joy being with them.
This one particular meeting was very interesting to me. One of our older members, Bill, who was 87 at the time caught my eye from across the room as soon as I walked in. Everyone is always friendly at rotary and likes to say hello and good morning to each other, but this was very different. Bill's eyes were calling to me, in a very sad way. I didn't feel comfortable, but I also had a hard time not looking at him. I went to get my breakfast and when I was looking for a place to sit, I could still feel Bill's eyes on me. I didn't sit next to him, out of my own uncomfortableness, but I remember very clearly looking up at him when I sat down. I remember thinking, "He is looking at me so sad. I must remind him of a daughter or granddaughter he lost." Because although his eyes looked like they could fill with tears any moment, I still felt warmth and love like they would be tears of seeing someone you have missed terribly.
The entire meeting I still felt that way from Bill. I couldn't shake it. I left abruptly after and all week the look on his face kept coming back to get me. Why didn't anyone else notice it? Why did I feel like it was targeted specifically for ME?!
When next Wednesday rolled along, Bill was not at our meeting. Everyone was talking about it because Bill was not one to miss a meeting without giving a proper notice. We later found out that Bill died in a car accident on his way to Rotary that morning.
All I could think about was the way he was looking at me, and remember those stories late at night at the kitchen table. One of my aunts would tell stories of how she would know people are going to die a week or two before it happens. It seemed like such a terrible gift to me. Now I'm left wondering if I have this gift as well. I've only been getting in touch with my spiritual side for the last 4 years. Luckily, during that time I have not known anyone to pass away.
If you have similar experiences, I would love to hear from you.