I want to develop whatever possibly psychic ability I have. I have this inkling gut feeling that I can get ideas/thoughts around me, but only to a minimal level. Also am not sure but I think there's also a possibility that I can push thoughts to other people if I put great effort but not control them.
What gave me idea regarding pushing thoughts to other people's mind was that once I was riding a public vehicle and I was seating in front of a very good looking guy, if I remember correctly I was imagining that I was seducing him and convincing him as to having sex with me. I was kind of looking out of the vehicle and 'blank' out. While I was doing this I can sense as if he's really thinking exactly what's going on my mind. Then, when he and her girlfriend was already going out of the vehicle he gave me a very questioning look as if I was strange... So I'm thinking if I really was able to push thoughts to him because I was really carried away with the thought of seducing him. Since then I never allowed myself to reach that level.
Regarding the possibility of being able to get ideas/thoughts around me, I remember three years ago whenever my boss asked me something I always get it right or provide her the exact answer she was expecting me to provide her but during those times I kind of blank out and then my mind seems empty. I don't even know where I got the right answers. Weird, I think I still got that with me although I'm more knowledgeable now. Weird now, it also brings back the memory during high school where I often get a bulls eye during discussion in class, meaning I'm have been commended by our physics teacher as to being able to answer her exactly.
With my current work, there were still some instances of being able to exactly provide the answer that anyone asks me but I'm thinking it's probably because I'm more knowledgeable at work now. But I clearly recalls instances where I half blank out while providing the right answer and I thought to myself I sound like a robot. LOL.
I've read some articles being posted here as well regarding controlling elements, I had some experience in that as well when I was younger (I'm currently 26). When I want it to rain, I'll whisper in the wind to make it rain and I remember doing it in front of my cousins.
Although I want to develop whatever ability I may have, I don't want the idea of blanking out my mind. I guess I'm still scared on that part like letting yourself go. I have this inkling idea that whatever there is to unlock whatever abilities I still may have, it's at the very back of my mind, which when I tried to fathom (like concentrating with my eyes closed that I was exploring from the back of my head) is quite tiring. Nothing much especial.
Another of my ability is to influence the atmosphere around me, which I haven't been doing anymore. I can do it easily if it's a negative emotion like void. Like when I enter a room in a bad mood and I don't want anyone to approach me, I'm trying hard thinking that I'm a void that they couldn't feel. Or if I had a bad temper, I'd want everyone around me to feel a heavy dark atmosphere. But lack of practice, or probably I'm trying to be in a neutral state. But lately it's as if my dreams are connecting me to the other part of my self.
To give you a brief background, I came from a family where my grandfather on my father's side is a witch doctor who knows strong incantations and has demons on his shoulders. That's what my father told me. Well we're Christians now so whatever hand me down in the family won't happen, and I probably won't allow it anyway, especially demons. Before I'm hearing stories in the family how when my grandfather and his brother were in a fight would use incantations to fight each other. Anyway my grandfather's brother is dead, thanks heaven I suppose.
Back to me. So what do you think? I want to develop my abilities but I don't want to abuse them to a certain level. And by the way, I'm a 'he'.