I'm just not sure what to think of this. I'm new to this site and I am hoping to find information as well as common ground with people because I've always felt alone in this area. I've always had experiences since I was a child. I mean I knew I saw things or perceived things that couldn't be explained. When my parents would occasionally fight when I was a kid, my reaction was different from my siblings because I was able to feel the exact emotions they were feeling and it was overwhelming. However, that was about what happen.
I could only feel and understand other people's emotion. I guess I started as an empath (?). As I got older things got more interesting. I started to dream events that seem to happen days after my dreaming. I also noticed shadow figures around my room; sometimes I would see people walking around. I paid no mind to it, I didn't know what my parents or siblings would say and I knew for a fact that it was a big NO on telling my friends.
When I hit my 16 birthday I had the weirdest experience yet, I remember I didn't even go to school for two weeks because I was scared and extremely tired. I remember dreaming about this girl my age, blond long hair in a pig tail. She was wearing a 60's-70's style cheerleading outfit and we were near a mountain that was burning down. I was there with her, it was like I knew her, then she dash towards the mountain and I went after her. It got dark to point where I knew something bad was going to happen. I remember she told me that her mother was murdered and her younger sister was missing. She said her father killed them and then we ended up in this sort of plain setting. There was a swing set with a lot of leaves and black plastic bags. I froze because of the emotions stirring in that place and then the girl opened one of the trash bags and her mother's body was there. I was about to go to her when we heard a noise. We turned and we saw her father... Gosh his image is burned in me... He was just evil. I remember him, 5'9 black greasy hair, and brown eyes, blue polo type of shirt, dark navy jeans and black boots around the age of 49. The worst part was his smile and the bloodied axe on his right hand. I was so scared and then I stepped back and I was suddenly in a cabin and I saw him just kill his daughter. I remember I was crying and trying to wake up because he saw me and headed towards me. I was pounding around the cabin crying and trying to just wake up. He got so close to me and was whispering something to me. My sister was working on a school project and she made a very large noise and that was the only way I was able to wake up. I couldn't stop crying after that or go back to sleep.
A couple days later my doxie starts barking around my bed in the morning, my sister comes and grabs him and freezes because she notices a figure near my bad. I awoke and I suddenly knew he was there. I shot up and ran out of the bedroom. The interesting part was that it was my sister that woke me up from my dream that saw the same man, and she described him to me. Now I hadn't told her of my dream and then everything felt surreal. I couldn't believe he was actually standing there staring at me. After that I was sick for a week or so. I mean up to date, I am still not sure what to think of this, and I've had dreams of him now and then, but sometimes I dream of other people, people who have been hurt in some way or another and I just don't know what to do; I even have conversations with them, they always ask me to tell something to their love ones and I find it a bit frustrating at times. After those events I also tend to keep their emotions along with mines and sometimes they become overwhelming.
Aside from that I sometimes perceive days differently. For example, I wake up and I know the day is different something is going to happen. When I head outside I see colors everywhere and I mean they are jumping at me. People, animals and plants just have a glow around them and I can read them easier, I mean I can even tell if they are getting sick or are sick without even knowing the individual. I find it strange but when this happens I tend to see a lot more of shadow people or ghost in my dreams or at my current place of residence. I don't know what to think of this but I do know last time that happen I ended up sick for a couple of weeks.
I guess I'm kind of scared at the moment. With me growing older a lot more things happen and that just scares me because I don't know what to do with it. I can't even control it and it's frustrating. I also feel somewhat alone with this. I don't really know anyone that has this type of perception going on their lives and I just want to figure out what I am, what I can do to help people and just be able to live with this. I guess now that I am 20 things just become weirder and weirder and I just don't know what to do.
I would appreciate any type of help or something just so I can understand this better. Thanks!