So the title why me, may be apt because I wouldn't say I was a non believer but I was skeptical you know an agnostic approach to the clairvoyant type event?
I had been ill for a little while, a disorder that affects your nervous system; when I started taking my medication it was like it unlocked some kind of door. I know what you're thinking that here is a whack job or oh I get it she is loopy her drugs are sending her off on some weird trip?
But believe me that is not the case I am a thirty six year old mother of three student pretty grounded, say it how you see it kind of a girl.
I dream mostly when I am asleep, but sometimes when I am awake, I think something or I see it is a more accurate description and then it happens nothing ground breaking just basic stuff.
I was in a shop with a friend at the time my first awake one happened it was a realization I just knew what was going to happen. I thought *Caroline's phone will ring and then she will walk across to the ice cream freezer and answer the phone, I knew she wouldn't tell me who had called and I knew I wasn't interested. Then it happened no biggie right? But it happened and I just knew it wasn't normal. The dreams:
I dream a man is stung to death next day's paper 'man stung to death'
I dream a man is turned on by sniffing a dogs butt, yeah I know gross, next day I see a film I didn't know existed nutty professor 2 if you have seen it then self explanatory, if not man is weirdly sharing DNA of a pooch.
I was separated from my husband, I had a dream that my husband went to a pub met my friends and that their mother was with them this would be very unusual anyway they ended up together, It freaked me out to the extent I realized I still loved him and couldn't lose him.
The next night we got back together and he mentioned afterward, he was in fact meeting these friends; I wangled an invitation as I wanted to be with him, when we later arrived together guess who was there? Yeah you got it the mother, my jaw dropped I could hardly speak.
There have been a dozen other random dreams including one I couldn't shake, I had it after an attack one afternoon it was haunting me so I told my Mum, the dream ended by my friend who was in my dream being saved by a warm light a flame light like the sun, I knew it had saved her, yeah I know whatever, then my daughter came home, and my mum said what did you do today, she replied that she had been on a trip to a church, she also said I lit a candle in the church, my mother turned to me and smiled saying 'there you go'.
I am not religious we are not a religious family I don't know what if anything I believe in but I am starting to think there may be more to life than we are born, we live, we die.
I wish I could be at peace with this thing, but I sometimes don't want to know the things I do, it scares me and sometimes it makes me sad I also have the feeling if I relax and let go I will know more, I will feel more, I will hear people who have passed, but I am scared because I see that this would feel noisy like lots of people trying to be heard? I just want to hear someone say they get me, that this is not as weird as I think it is but...?
I don't want to be looked at like some weird freak, I haven't mentioned this to my husband, my daughter knows because I told "her oh I had this weird dream" and then she would be like whoa that has happened!
So the questions may be why me?