I don't know how to say this and its not really something I've talked about before, but I really need to get it out so I'm just going to put it out there. I seem to have an effect over other peoples emotions. If I'm in a room full of people, and I feel that they are stressed or worried I send out calming emotions to them, and almost immediately feel, and see the difference. By see the difference I mean I can see their body untensing or their fist's uncurling. By feel I mean that I also have a sensitivity to other peoples emotions. This wouldn't be a problem except lately I can't control it as well. Meaning that I'm sending out emotions (negative and positive) without meaning to. I have depression, and I've heard other people say that they feel inexplicably sad just being near me. My boyfriend (whom I am usually calm and happy around) has told me that being around me gives him a calming effect. When I'm angry people around me also seem to get angry. Just to list a few examples. I've known I could do this for awhile I used to use it on my friends to cheer them up when they got sad but I used to be able to control it to some degree. Now it seems that I just send my influence without even meaning too.
I have a few other abilities also. One of them almost like premonition. I can feel when somethings going to happen be it good or bad and can tell whether the event will be good or bad. I can feel it in the pit of my stomach. I can not tell you what will happen though or who it will involve. For example last weekend my boyfriend surprised me by coming over unexpectedly. All day that day I had a feeling that something good was going to happen and was uncharacteristically excited. Another example was when my mother got diagnosed with cancer. For weeks I felt that something was very wrong. When my mother came to me and told me she was feeling sick. I got one of the worst feelings I have ever felt to the point where it was physically painful like a knife to the chest. She went to the doctor after I told her she needed to (over the years she has learned to trust my judgement) sure enough a few days maybe a week later. She was diagnosed with a disease called weagners which is very closely related to cancer and has the same treatments. After the doctors put her on chemo I felt better and when she asked me if I felt she would live I immediately answered yes. Its been three years and she is now in remission. This experience taught me that these abilities were a gift as well as a curse. When used properly they can save lives.
Another ability of mine is I can sense spirits. They often come to visit me in dreams. This is a new ability and quite frankly it scares me. Seeing as some of the spirits aren't so nice or pretty. If anyone else experiences this please tell me if just for the reason that I'll know there are others like me out there.
By the way I just turned 18 two months ago. All of these abilities manifested in me at different ages. The ability to sense emotions I have had for as long as I can remember. I first noticed that I could effect other peoples emotions at age 9 but I have a feeling that I was doing it without my knowledge since I was younger. The premonitions started at 13. The spirit sensitivity started about a year ago.
Does anyone know how these things work?
Do they get more intense as you age?
I know they can be controlled with practice but does practicing at using them make them more intense?
Does having these abilities make me evil?
Is it wrong for me to use them?
Do these abilities run in the family or are they passed down genetically?
Or do they mean that somethings wrong with me?