I'm going to start from the beginning, and be as exact as I can. My "experiences" have been going on for so long, I may have trouble remembering. My first question (I'm going to focus on this one, I will be posting with further questions and stories later) relates to these "day dreams" that I have always had. One could say that I'm a dreamer, but I feel that it's more than that.
When I was really young, I'm not sure what age, I would go into these dazed states where I have some sort of vision. I am fully conscious, but it's as if I am suddenly elsewhere. I would dream that my family goes somewhere and I am witnessing a conversation between people, or I am simply watching a new episode of Spongebob on TV. Then, I would return to reality and have no recollection of ever having had this dream. Sometime later, I would witness the scene all over again and suddenly remember my dream. I would have flashbacks of the dream and feel this very odd sensation behind my eyes. I can't exactly describe it. It doesn't hurt, it's just mildly uncomfortable.
The dreams used to be fairly short and I would forget some of what I saw. Now, though, the dreams are longer and very clear. I am now remembering full conversations and more real sensations than before. For example; today I was in a situation where my mother was speaking about getting something for dinner, I was listening to music on Youtube, and my brother was scratching my back (my family always does this, it's comforting to us). I knew immediately that I had seen this before in a dream, and remembered feeling my brother's fingers on my back. I even felt exactly what I and my mother would say next, knew when my brother would lift his hand away from me, and what part of the song I would be at. It was strange, because I can't recall my day dreams ever being so vivid before. I had never actually felt more of the senses that just sight and sound before. Similarly, a few years ago my night dreams have all become lucid. I wonder if this may be getting stronger as I grow into my fifteenth year of life?
Throughout my short life, there has been this constant pull and lure into the realm of the supernatural. Being involved in it feels very natural to me. I understand this probably isn't very safe, but I almost don't have any control over it. I feel that I am supposed to be a part of it, if that makes any sense. My heart is flooded with this intuition that my life is meant to be more than just what my High School is trying to teach me. I feel that there is something more that I'm supposed to be doing. I can't be sure what it is, but I know that all of this is a part of it. I hope I don't seem like I'm reading too far into this, but I really know that there is something waiting for me. The uncertainty both terrifies me, and excites me.
I joined this site because I feel I have finally found some place reliable to seek for help. I have scoured so many other sources for information, but have come up with nothing. I really would appreciate help in finding answers, and gaining control over whatever this is. I don't want to suppress it, but strengthen and control it so that I can learn to deal with it in a safe way. This may sound a bit silly, but I would also like to use this for the good of others. I am very driven to help others in any way that I can, no matter what that may be. If my dreams are a way to help me do that, then I am all for it! Is this an actual ability that I have? Or is something else going on? Is there any way I could train this, or anyone willing to help?
I thank everyone in advance for helping me, and I look forward to your answers!
One more thing, there is a psychic in my town but I haven't met them before. Would that be a good person to speak with?