I'm a 25 year old male from the UK. It started before Christmas when I had a feeling my partner of 5 years was playing away. I had no evidence just a feeling. I talked to her about it and she reassured me that I was just feeling insecure and I do believe the word "paranoid" popped up once or twice as well. The relationship had not been doing very well the last year or so and I felt a growing dissatisfaction between us both. We both smoked a lot of pot and that was something I was increasingly aware of becoming a problem, anyway I am getting off point. It turns out she had been playing away, when I found out, I wasn't surprised but still hurt. I moved out and found a quiet place to live on a country lane alone. I give up Pot, Nicotine, alcohol everything and spent an agonizing few weeks adjusting to my new solitary sober existence. One day I started to feel better the Nicotine was gone, The blanket wrapped brain of a Pot smoker was no more and I started to feel strong enough to socialize again.
Then I was shopping at the supermarket, just going along and started to get this sort of buzzing in my head I suppose at first it sounded like white noise it was very strange, I felt sort of weakened and tired. Then I noticed as I was looking at people I was definitely picking things up from them. Not individual thoughts but more of a general feeling. For example I seen a young couple and the guy was so tired he had been working all week so hard. He just wanted out. He was getting angry at having to pick between this toilet paper and that disinfectant and his partner was bewildered as to why he was so miserable. I knew at that moment I was feeling that guys feelings. It continued as I walked by people picking up on there feelings, by the time I was out of the shop I felt exhausted and a little sick. I went straight home turned out the lights and slept.
Back home again in my quiet part of the world I felt better. Calm. Then I had a text from my niece, she had just found a lovely new apartment and was moving in with a friend, she asked me to come round that night to check it out. I happily obliged.
I went round and it was lovely to see my niece she is always very happy and bubbly and a fantastic host, the apartment was beautiful and it was really nice to see her so happy. Then walked in her roommate. I had never seen her before and she was very attractive actually she was the first person I can remember thinking of like that since my heartbreak. It was odd because she walked in and I was sat on the sofa opposite the door entering the sitting room, she came in and for a few brief moments she just kind of looked at me and I at her, now I know we both had never laid eyes on each other before but I felt like somehow we already knew each other. The moment was broken when my niece eventually introduced me as her uncle.
We had a fun night, my niece actually went to bed early and myself and her roommate sat into the night talking and laughing I ended up stopping over (on the couch) and left early the following morning. Now I had taken to doing meditation before bed to help me sleep and it has been working rather well. That night though I was sat just focusing on my breath and her face or more her eyes came so vividly to my mind they was full of tears and sadness and I felt a terrible wave of pain right into my soul and suddenly I knew things about that girl that I had met only once. She had been in an abusive relationship and beaten. She had also suffered with eating disorders but most of all I knew the girl was looking for someone to love and felt empty inside I felt all of this within the smallest of moments. I was completely taken back by it all. I text my niece and told her that I think she needs to keep an eye on her friend because I think she is troubled. She asked me why I thought this and I told her about my meditation and what I felt. My niece confirmed that what I felt was true as her roommate had opened up and told her! Okay so now my head is going ten to the dozen and I can't stop thinking about the girl. What the hell has happened to me? Anyway so yesterday I checked my FB and had a message from the girl asking if we can meet for a chat? I'm completely at a loss as what to do!
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