This will likely be a bit shorter than my other submissions, and the purpose is to ask a question that will hopefully lead to some understanding or connection on my part, that I am not alone in this.
Let me start off by giving a bit of a story to help explain my point of view.
In case you have not read my other submissions I would like to inform you that I never had much of a support system concerning any of my abilities.
The treatment I received ranged between being scoffed at, put down, told I am a liar, or just being dismissed entirely. In general, it has been fairly negative.
This created a lot of anxiety, depression and anger for me. However something else that I can only trace back to that treatment is the incessant need to prove myself.
It ranges through everything, from proving I colored a picture, to presenting my college degree as a display of truth.
It is increasingly frustrating and difficult for me to deal with. I am constantly fighting that need.
Most recently, my parents went through a divorce, perhaps 3 or 4 years ago. This resulted in my mother eventually getting her own house.
I have been on my own since I was 18 years old, so I wasn't right in the middle of the mess when it started (I was 20), thankfully. However, because of my lacking involvement with the situation, I had no idea that she had even gotten her own house until we went out for lunch one day and she decided to drive me by it. She was just closing on the house so she had only walked through it a hand full of times, and she knew nothing of the property.
I had put my foot down when I was 19 and decided to work with my gifts rather than running from them. As a result, when she drove by her house, I was open with her about what I picked up on, regardless of if she wanted to hear it or not.
I told her about picking up on a woman named Mildred, and that I believed they called her Millie. I told her she was about 67 years old, very motherly and a few other things that I was able to recognize.
Of course, as usual, she just scoffed at me and then ignored me after.
A few months later (about 4 months ago from today's date - 5/21/2016) she admitted to me about seeing a few weird things in the house. Being that I am a walking thesaurus on the Paranormal and Generally Odd, she turned to me for answers. It was then that I learned she had actually talked to a few neighbors and gotten a few letters in the mail a dressed to one miss Mildred Hale.
Mildred was a real person. Living at that address just a few years peior, and she passed away at age 67. She has several kids, and she always had at least one of them living with her at all times. (The basement of this house is fantastic by the way, it's essentially a studio apartment down there. I love it) I found that everything I had informed her of she had managed to confirm.
This confirmation was fantastic. It was validation to me, and proof to her - somebody that had always scoffed at me - that I'm not crazy or just making things up.
But the thing is, I shouldn't have to feel that way. I shouldn't have to feel like I need to prove myself to my own mother. I shouldn't have to be excited about something validating my words.
I just wandered of anybody else had or has this issue, and how are you or did you deal with it? I think I seriously need to find a way to cope, because it's getting to the point where I am having a difficult time forgiving people for treating me less than I deserve just because I can't pull documentation out of thin air for the spirits I encounter or the information they decide to give me.
I really don't like feeling as though I am in a constant state of unsure insecurity. Any advice or similar stories would be appreciated.