My experiences (which continue to this day) started back in 2003, upon the death of a very close family member in another country. I was living and working in Eastern Europe when I had to go to the Mediterranean region for a funeral. We were very close in life. The only compelling moment at her funeral that stands out in my mind is when we had her viewing (in the cemetery, in a crypt area), I was extremely distraught, and asked other people to leave so I could have a few last words with her. It is my affirmation that right at that moment, not only was she listening, but apparently so was some one or something else. I can look back on this moment now, and pinpoint it as the start of a very long, continuous, and at times, frightening, paranormal journey.
One week later, after her funeral, I returned to the host country (which, oddly enough, had its own history-recent war that killed thousands, poverty, famine, horrible atrocities), and bizarre things started. Things that I initially explained away as stress due to the job I had, lack of sleep from long hours worked. It wasn't until, almost 8 years later, working in the US, that I was able to definitely explain all the odd experiences.
One of the first things that started happening was my sheets would fluff (like someone was trying to make the bed) when I would try to go to sleep. I fixed that problem by getting larger size cover sheets, and making my bed military style tight. Then, the bed started shaking. Nothing violent, but I also explained that away because we had in-place detonations (UXO pit) that occurred frequently, constant helicopter traffic, AMTRAC vehicles rolling through all hours. I ended up putting sandbags over the metal edges of my bed, on the footboard and headboard. It was effective. And then, the whispering started. In languages I could not understand. Headphones helped with that. At this point, I thought I might be losing my mind.
I took an in-country transfer to another location. This area was hardest hit with genocide. Hundreds of thousands of people were slaughtered there. Mass graves were being uncovered regularly. Little did I know that this transfer would start some pretty harrowing stuff. There were maybe 25 of us there. I was the first, and only, woman (I was a civilian, not military) to have been assigned to this location. So, I had my own room. And, the events I was experiencing at my last location were now ten times worse. This is where the dreams started. And, the wailing-people that sounded like they were in extreme pain, horrible distress-started at night. The first dream I had came from that family member. Instinctively, I knew it was her when she appeared (but she didn't really appear-I could only see pitch black, but I could hear her, speaking in her native language). She told me she had tried to make contact with me, but she knew I was afraid. She told me she couldn't stay any longer, and had to go somewhere where she wouldn't be coming back. And, the next night after that dream, things went full on-almost like she left a door cracked that allowed others to slip through. After about three months of consistent dreams with people I've never met, whisperings, wailing and crying, things stepped out of my dreams, and into this world. Now, I felt consistently as if I was being watched, saw fast moving shadows out of the corner of my eye, and saw what I can only explain by describing it-what looked like strings in various colors that would appear from the corner of ceilings or by windows (that I now know to be ectoplasm). For the next four years, I moved to other in-country locations, but things remained fairly frequent. New things would happen, though. Glasses exploded, literally for no reason. TV and electronics would go on and off. And now, animals would appear and just sit outside wherever I was, almost as if they were looking in the house, hotel, apartment-owls, birds, cats, dogs. Once I made eye contact with them, they would leave. It was eerie-and people I was with would comment how odd that was. I eventually became used to all the odd experiences, learned how to brace myself before I went to sleep at night, and explained away every electronic manipulation, every door opening and closing, fire alarm that would randomly go off...
So, after almost five years of this, I relocated back to the US, and took a position at a large military installation on the East Coast. And, one night, a co-worker who was into ghost hunting asked me if I wanted to accompany them to a location where they had captured some EVP's about a year earlier. Here's the odd thing-every time we made arrangements to go (we were on night shift, so it was usually after 11 pm), something would happen to stop me from going with him. After about three months of this, we made it out to the location. He took audio and pictures. The only odd thing that happened was when we entered a particular building, I became physically ill-dizzy, weak and felt like I was going to vomit. When we got back to our office, what we heard and saw was unbelievable. Before we entered the building, a child's voice whispered "Get Out! Don't go in there!" And then we heard a male voice tell us, very clearly to "Get Out!" There was a lot of static on the audio, but only when the male voice would replay (like he was telling other people) what we were doing, and where we were going-he would say it, and you'd hear static covering up other voices. He also said something we later translated from Latin, that either "Supra Tetra" (four above) or "Supra Terra" (above earth). The most frightening ordeal for me, because it was personally directed to me, was when a piece of electronic equipment in my vehicle went off while we were standing about 50 feet away. I told my co-worker about a similiar situation that happened about 6 months earlier at a specific location, and how odd it was that this could happen. He started snapping photos of the vehicle. When we looked at the later, it looked like red lightening bolts were coming out of it, going toward the sky. The male voice also specifically challenged me by saying, in a very menacing tone "Why don't you take yourself back there?" I was also called a "stupid b*tch" by this male when I sensed something was on me, and told my co-worker to start snapping pics of me (there was. It was like yellow globs, specifically on my chest, where I had an Ankh charm, and my hand, which held some stones the family member who passed gave me). Going through the rest of the pictures revealed long yellow ribbons, and the red lightening bolt in almost every shot.
And from there, if I was on night shift, I encountered something every night. I carried an audio recorder with me for my job, and came across many, many spirits and entities. Some were protective-I had one tell to "Run!" when I was with my partner, and we were at a remote location doing a check, and heard what we thought were coins being thrown at us. When we reviewed the audio, we heard a man's voice telling me to "Run!" and instead coins, we heard a very menacing laugh off in the distance. There were a lot of events where I encountered (and only found out what was really happening after reviewing audio) very negative things that did not like me, or my presence-growling, barking, calling me names, telling me to "Get Out". But, on the flip side, there were also beings or entities that seemed to be watching over me-a group of voices in the woods telling me (and my co-worker) to "Have a good night", warnings not to go in somewhere. One spirit, whom I instinctively named "Pappy", used to leave a bar door unlocked, and play music as I entered. And, we tested this theory by having another unit check the door to ensure it was secured after-hours, and then I went there-and lo and behold, it was unlocked. A melodic set of female voices (when I went into an old morgue that other co-workers were in to tell them to get out because I had a bad feeling about going in there, and them ghost hunting in there) saying "It's one. It's the one". What that means, I don't know.
So, while this was happening at work, it started also happening in my house. Now mind you, I already had been dealing with some fairly odd, unexplainable things for years prior to this. It took a whole new direction now. Glasses still exploded, my hard-wired fire alarm was randomly going off, TV's and computers would still go on and off by themselves. But now I had a dog. And, he started acting very odd. Constantly on alert. He would look out the windows at night and growl, alerted, like someone or something was there. The shadows that I occasionally saw were increased, the feeling of being watched was constant. And, one evening, on my night off, I was lying bed, trying to go to sleep, when I had a sense (now this was almost 8 years in to my paranormal experiences, and I developed this "sense" where it almost felt like a vacuum and sounded like a train was coming before anything paranormal showed up. I also had this feeling, like chills, whenever I came in contact with anything paranormal, and if I was on the verge of sleep, I would become literally paralyzed, unable to move) that something was happening. I left my hall light on, and saw, clear as day, two men literally "hop" through my closed laundry room window and start looking around. One was older (maybe late 50's, early 60's), while his companion was young (maybe 25). And, I knew they were looking for me. I pulled the covers over my head, and laid still. And, I started praying (something I hadn't done in over 20 years). I don't remember falling asleep, but I did. My next experience was when I was distraught (oddly enough, a long-term relationship dissolved quickly and badly), lying in bed, and felt a hand caressing my head. That frightened me, and when I told it to "Stop!" I looked over to the other side of the bed, and the down comforter was puffing back up, like someone was sitting there. It was at this point that I knew I was dealing with the paranormal, and now it was affecting me. I started having "premonitions" if you will cal, it that, and was literally able to tell my co-workers of events that were going to happen the next day. Animals, particularly birds, and a lot of them, were slamming against my glass windows regularly. I'd go outside to find a dog sitting there, laying down, head on paws, staring at me. My audio was full of people (spirits) talking, saying "Hello" and literally responding to conversations I would have with co-workers. One co-worker said "All this odd, bizarre stuff only happens when I ride with you." And, he was right. There were people who refused to ride with me because "odd" things would happen when they were with me-like doors opening and closing by themselves in buildings, tapping on windows in buildings or on the car windows (and there'd be no one there), electronic equipment going awry, lights in buildings that were abandoned or closed would go off like disco lights. People were starting to get scared to work with me, I was getting tired of constantly having something happen at home or at work, and the mix of negative and positive interactions was just too much. I had a particular dream where I was with a group of girls, and overheard them talking about another girl who was getting beaten up regularly by her boyfriend. I tried to respond to them, because I thought I was part of the group, but they acted like they couldn't hear me. I stepped in front of one, and she walked right through me. Like, I was the ghost. And then, I saw the girl. She had a black eye, and I tried to get her to listen to me by yelling "You have to leave him! He's going to kill you!" And, like the other girls, I stepped in front of her to stop her, to get her attention. And she walked through me. And right at that moment, as I watched her walk away, trying to figure out what I needed to do to warn her, a blackness enveloped me. I knew I was in trouble. A very menacing voice told I'd better start minding my own business and stop meddling in his affairs. I was called every name in the book, and warned that if I didn't stop, he would kill me. And, this was another time I started praying. Less than 10 days later, I hit a deer at 60 mph on my way to work. And I'm going to tell you that at 4 o'clock in the morning, sitting out on an empty highway, in pitch black (because when I hit that buck, the $10k in damage it caused killed my battery), I heard, clear as day, a voice say "This is your final warning." Because I don't want to reveal too much about what my job was, I was in a position where I helped people. I resigned my position 8 months later, because I thought it might be location. I was wrong. It was me. Because it didn't stop. I even sat in my home, talking to no one in particular before I left my job, asking them to stop bothering me at home, stop scaring people at work. It toned it down, but it didn't stop. And, it was happening everywhere, in the presence of others-I could be visiting relatives in another state who had zero paranormal experiences, and here I come, staying with them, and we hear someone running down their hallway. Or, their doorbell would start ringing late at night, and no one would be at the door. My favorite was when I was visiting my parents house, and on Christmas Day, their phone rang. I didn't answer it because I had just gotten out of the shower, so it went to their answering machine. And, a woman (who did not sound like my deceased family member) said, in that native language "It's me, it's (what I use to call her). George is here with me. I love you and miss you. Happy Name Day! (this was significant because no one, besides family, would know this) ". I looked at the caller ID. It came from overseas, from the same country my deceased family member lived in. I called it back. It rang and rang, and then would go dead. I played the message for my mother (who speaks the native language), my step-father and my sister. My mother became somewhat angry, saying "That's not xxxx. There's no way. When you're dead, you're dead." She excused herself for the rest of the day, and wouldn't come down. Five months later, the person she said was with her (my Godfather) had died, unknown to us, 3-4 months earlier. My step-father, who believes when you die, that's it, said "I'm not one to say this, but statistically what are the chances of someone calling a wrong number from xxxx, telling you "Happy Name Day!" in your native language?" It was really my confirmation of what I already knew.
I had to do something. So, I started doing a lot of research on the Internet. I started communicating with mediums to find out what was going on. And, I was told that I had the "gift", the ability to communicate with them. Okay great, but what I needed to know was how can I filter them, so I wasn't a revolving door for every desperate spirit, every lost or negative entity? And slowly, but surely, I figured it out. I will say this-I was born into my religion, but did not practice it. I entered into a field of work that relied on facts and observable, explainable events. But, when I could no longer refute the unexplainable, I sought out answers in faith. I renewed my faith in God, and from there gained strength to keep the negative entities at bay. I cannot stress this portion enough. Now, I also sought out other remedies from different practices-Hoodoo, Wiccan, Native American practice, Islam, Buddhism, and found some of their practices work. I learned what crystals work, how to use and wear them, grid your home. I utilized saging and smudging. I discovered how to control my environment in my dream state to exit potentially negative situations and entities. I also listen to my "senses"-the chill feeling I would get initially in my journey which indicated I was in the presence of spirits or entities, look for clues in my environment (animals, in particular, and their presence and behavior). I also continued consulting experienced mediums (oddly enough, I encountered one in my dreams who specifically told me her name, and made contact with her) who recommended different methods to gain control of my situation. It has been 13 years since it all started, and for the last 9 months, things have been calm. I can sleep normally (the dreams still happen, but they're different now, and I have a lot more control over where I am, and how to leave), the physical manifestations have stopped, the feeling of being watched constantly is gone. I do stay away from certain locations-graveyards, hospitals, abandoned buildings. And, I've learned to listen to my "senses" when I'm around certain people-yes, I've encountered people that give me the same exact sensation that I had when I encountered spirits or entities (what that means, I don't know, but I get the ense they have "attachments", so to speak. And some of them are not positive).
I continue, every day, to seek out answers as to how to manage this appropriately, because it has taken a new turn, so to speak. Now that I have (what I deem to be effective) closed off a door that allowed them access into this physical world, I developed what some would call "Astral Travel". This started about 9-10 months ago. The first time it happened, I was awake, and felt a pull, like my body was jumping. And, then it happened. It was very much like the dreams I had in the past, but now they started off where I was almost flying-over clouds, over landscape like you'd see out of an airplane, and BAM! I'd end up in different areas, with different people. The odd thing is, I'd start asking questions "What's the date today?" Or "Where are we?" And in a few instances, was chased out, with them yelling "She doesn't belong here!" One very disconcerting one had me and another individual (an older man) grappling, I was fighting to get him off me, and he was restraining my hands (I was actually visiting someone in another state, staying in their home). I bit him, and he he took a huge bite out of my neck that felt like an electrical jolt, like a tear. So now, I no longer ask certain questions, since it's almost like I'm the "ghost" so to speak, entering another realm, moving among them. And like them making entry into our world, once they realize I don't "belong", some get aggressive and try to catch me or chase me out. Some times, I've not left my bedroom, and had one gentleman show up, who was very nervous about "them" coming, and kept looking out my window. I cannot remember our conversation, only that he was concerned about someone coming. I asked him to leave, particularly if "they" were coming for him, and he did, willingly (hence the more control in some aspects). A very recent experience had me swimming in a river surrounded by cliffs, and as I swam to the bank, saw a very large Buddha head. As I got out, some kids who appeared to be Asian, got in. I walked out of the water into an area that had houses, and a young boy approached me. I did ask him where we were, and he "Kazakhstan". And I remember thinking that can't be right. He told me about a medical condition he had, and I had this overwhelming sense that I could help him, and asked him if he wanted me to help him? Right at that moment, I felt this huge pull, like a vacuum, and watched as I was pulled away like in the movies and he became smaller and smaller. I also had the sense that I was not supposed to "help" him, it was not my place. I Googled "Buddhism in Kazakhstan" when I awoke, and lo and behold found that the Silk Road from China ran into Kazakhstan a very long time ago, and that there were in fact huge inscriptions on rocks and cliffs (there to this day) off the banks of a river. I don't know what to make of that, of what it means, of whether it was in this physical world, or something that existed elsewhere that was a carbon copy of this physical world.
Anyways, if you've made it this far, and have any insight, I'd appreciate it. It is my belief that the family member who died left a door open, because this all started right after the funeral. It is what it is, but the more I am able to understand and manage it, the better my quality of life will be. Thanks for reading.