This is a long story so bare with me. I'm 20 years old. I've had an unusual life I guess you could say. I've had too many supernatural, psychic, etc. Experiences to count. I'm not even sure where to begin with this. I just need help. I don't know what I am, or even who I am at this point. I just know that I have some kind of gift. It all began when I was 13 and I had a friend who introduced me to this side of the world. Her mom was Wiccan and her dad committed suicide when my friend was fairly young. I experienced some paranormal activity when I was with her that was minor such as ash trays being knocked on the floor, knocking on the walls, flickering lights just typical things. She showed me how her dad was her "spirit guide" and she talked to him by using a pendulum and a piece of paper with letters on it and with yes no etc. She asked if I wanted to try it and it worked for me, very well actually. My spirit guide was apparently my great grandfather. I began by just asking simple questions which were all either correct at the time or correct as I got older. I did this for several months. After a while the answers I was getting weren't correct at all. I mean questions that were obvious like "Is my shirt red?" And it would say "no" when it was clearly red. After that strange things started to happen to me. I was seeing a black shadow in random places, night & day. Nothing so scary that I couldn't take it. Just enough for me to notice. After about a month, It got worse. I seen it more often, I felt uncomfortable everywhere I went, it would pop up in my dreams. On one occasion I was laying on my floor on my stomach and I had a box fan IN THE MIDDLE OF my bed. It flew off and landed on the back of my knees and it hit me really hard. One night, all literal hell broke loose for me. I came home and I reached for my door knob and before I could turn it my door opened and of course I thought that was odd. I was sitting in the living room and kept seeing something in the hallway, so I decided to head to bed. When I was laying there a black shadow with long fingernails and red glowing eyes comes out from under my bed and looks at me so I run and turn on my lights and lay back down and it happens again. Then my jewelry holder goes flying off my dresser towards my head. And I can't take it anymore. I'm sitting in the corner praying to god to just make it all go away because I can't do it anymore. Crying and screaming on the floor terrified for my life I finally make my way out the door to my moms room. I tell her everything finally and she comes into my room and sees the shadow too. Finally, someone to clarify I'm not crazy. My mom has a come to Jesus meeting in my room when she sends me off to grandmothers. I later find out the same entity was torturing my moms boyfriend too. I don't see that figure again. I actually got baptized soon after too because I knew where I needed to lay my hope and faith. Another story, we've had this ghost in my grandmas beauty shop. One I've known of since I was little. For some reason I had a feeling around the same year (when I was 13) that there was a little girl there too. Later to find out when we have a paranormal investigation there that there is in fact, a little girl there too. I don't know why I knew... I just did. I seen her too. She was just a white shadow that followed behind me and my mom every now and then. She is attached to us for some reason. She said so through the "voice box" they used to communicate with her. As I got older I had more unusual experiences but ones that I won't talk your head off about. I noticed when I was 19 that I have such an accurate "gut feeling." Just simple things like, I'll think of something for some reason and not know why and something involving the image I seen in my head happens soon after. Or I'll tell my friends things like "I know you like to drive fast but deer are still out" and then on her way home after she dropped me off she almost hit a family of deer. Or one night I thought to myself "I wonder if deer are still out" and then one ran in front of the car. Actually a lot of times I think about deer they appear. One time I went to a luncheon for my new job and other "working women" around town. When I got there I had a strong case of deja vu, so heavy it made me dizzy. Then when they were doing the drawing for the grand prize I casually thought "watch them call my name" and I turned around shrugging it off cause I never win anything and then they said my name over the microphone and I was stunned. On my 20th birthday I felt lucky so I bought a lottery ticket and won some money. Another time I felt lucky I won on three different lottery tickets in a row. Another time when I was in my room with my friend I was looking at her and noticed a blue light around her so I told her I could see her aura and we looked up personality traits for that aura and it was on point. I looked at myself and found my main color I think it was yellow I'm not sure, I looked it up. On point again. I finally had a witness to testify to myself that I have some type of, well, something. At work one day I was all alone and I got to watching some videos on YouTube just about different things in the world, conspiracy theories, celebrities, psychic abilities and things of that nature. I had this feeling come over me that I have an important purpose of being in the world like I have a job to do or that I have an actual reason for being on this big earth. I broke down into tears this feeling was so powerful. Sometimes I have this weird feeling or a thought of holding something in my hands when I'm not. Like holding onto something that's weird shaped or very small or something of that nature. I don't know what that is either. My friends tried to get me to go to the bar and I just felt like I shouldn't go and they got into a wreck that night. There's just all kinds of things in my life that confuse me. I don't know where to turn to, or who to talk to. I don't know what to do. I feel like I have some kind of gift and I don't know how to make the best of it. I'm very religious so I'm scared, I don't want to get into anything too deep and it introduce me to negative things like that demon that followed me when I was just 13. Someone with some advice please help me and give me some guidance and tell me how I can make the best of these things in my life. I truly do believe I can make a change in This world someday somehow, I just need to get on the right track.
I Have A Gift And I Don't Know What It Is
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