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I Want What I Feel

 

I don't know if this is the right place to post but I need to get it out. The need to talk about this overwhelming urge to go after this is too much to contain. I have experienced so much as the person who had brought me to this website. I feel different, like I don't fit in that I stand out among the rest no matter how much I try to fit in. There is nothing that's helped me feel content and to fit in. I agree the human race is disgusting and I hate how I am part of it while still feeling out of place. I want to help though, I have the urge to hold out a hand and show what we are doing to ourselves and others.

I feel watched constantly, sometimes it's like the warmth of being held by a mother while you sleep while other times I feel watched simply to be judged. Usually though it feels like something there is to hold my hand and tell me its okay. It doesn't feel okay though, I live with an emotionally abusive family who is bent keeping me here. I want to explore the world, it draws to me unlike anything I've experienced. I also feel like I want to go home but I don't know where that home is. If I search the world maybe I could find it. I feel like there is a real family out there for me and I want to find them so badly its brought me to tears most nights.

I believe in reincarnation and I feel like my past life has some strong sense in my life now. Like I have something to live up to but I can't grasp it. I feel like I've gone to this home in my dreams, that I've met this family through them. The blurring bright colors and the overwhelming feeling of love, something I want to hold tightly to my chest. Some of my dreams have come true a bit after I have them, down to the last detail and it makes me wonder about my own mind. I feel like I could be better but I let humanity drag me to the muddy depths that many have sunk to. I'm torn between wanting to fit in or figure out what these feelings are pulling me to. All of my life these feelings have stayed buried in deep, others would laugh at me was something that would constantly hang over my head.

I go to music and nature as my source of comfort. Music during long rides in the countryside helps soothe me, or long walks in the woods. I feel this strong pulling to nature, I always have. I could sit under the trees and listen to the birds all day, it helps me get away from the polluted cities and screaming family. That motherly hold embraces me and warms me from the inside out. There was a time I stayed out for so long they had to come find me but I still didn't want to leave. The woods are such a dangerous but beautiful place, it's something that humanity doesn't deserve to have. I want to protect it, to have the strength to stand up for something I love so very much.

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Comments about this clairvoyant experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Admiralblitz, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

MeadowDawn (1 stories) (11 posts)
 
3 weeks ago (2019-01-29)
Admiralblitz,
What you are feeling, I have experienced myself. It's like your longing for a place that doesn't exist. But this doesn't mean you don't fit in somewhere. There are others just like you, who understand what you are going through. I myself, understand your connection to nature. There is something about the woods, hearing the birds chirp, the rustling of leaves, and soothing sounds of the wind blowing through the trees. I could walk through the woods for hours, and never tire of it.

More to the point, no one is perfect, and sometimes people don't know what we have gone through in our lifetime. And that's okay. We weren't born to fit in, we were born to shine, stand out. Follow your dreams, and listen to your heart. Follow the path that is calling to you, don't be afraid to be different. Who you are is beautiful, abilities and all.

If you are interested, I am starting a school. It is for all psychics, witches, and other beings alike, to learn about what they are. No more shying away from our potential, instead we embrace what we are. This school will be full of others just like you, and it will present you with an opportunity to feel that sense of comfort. To know what a family is like, and not to be afraid of who and what you are.

The choice is up to you, but we would love to have to join!

Best Regards,
Dawn
Ismael (25 posts)
 
1 month ago (2019-01-09)
Hi,
Escuse-me becouse i'm not an english spoken. I'm from Brazil and i'm an spirtist. I steel beleave, as you, we have a soul and it's independent of our brain. If we reborn focusing our spiritual growing, some times our soul trie to giv-up facing the natural challenges of our life. Them, we feel like a prision in our body and a feeling of sadness and not belong to this world come over us. It means our desire of freedom. We must resist and fight against this bad feeling. Life belong to us to live searching happyness and spiritual growing, not failure, not giv-up from our destiny and tasks. You are a devine been ande has the rigth to plain life. Think good.
darklight11 (4 posts)
 
2 months ago (2018-12-23)
You can be who you want to be. All it starts is in your mind and your belief shapes you. If you believe you are a weak, ungifted, polluted, scared, etc... Then this is the truth you believe in and this is who you will become. If you believe you are strong, powerful, confident, outgoing, etc... This is what you believe and will become.

Only true adversary is your own negative and downgrading thoughts that intrudges you like a serpent, trying to peg you down. Other's people voices that smack against you are just that, nothing. They aren't worth your time and effort, if you feel like you need to leave, then leave.

The motto of "just do it" is the hardest step to overcome because of the fear of unknown. The more you fortify your mind with your own positive and strong thoughts, the stronger you become. It needs to become a habit where you catch yourself that you can change. The world gives you what you deserve and it all comes pulling from your thoughts, your words that are spoken, and action. Take steps, small that are small accomplishment which becomes something great.

Your purpose is simple and complex. It is a passion that moves your soul, a want that makes you so thirsty you can't look back to the past because it is what you want. The fear of stopping keeps you going because you already burnt your boat. The purpose is the whole journey of the walk as well as the goal that you set yourself at the end. The calling that makes you motivated, it changes, for sure, but the "core value of your passion" does not.

People will give up, most of the people will stop and say its impossible. Then it means your passion wasn't worth all that effort because it seem like a dream. It will take time to get to the end of your goal, if you have one. If you don't even know what you want in life, then it is difficult to move forward.

Set goals, big and small. Search in that "want" drive you have. Form around it and find something that excites you. That is where most of the time the "core" value of your passion are and the purpose begin and ends.

Good luck, may God bless you on your journey.
Lyro (431 posts)
 
2 months ago (2018-12-21)
Being normal is overrated. You didn't really say what you are looking for so I'm going to assume you're just looking for people who understand what you're feeling? The worst feeling with things like this is the feeling of not knowing who or what you are. To have a name that isn't known to you, and feel like you're missing a part of yourself. Many people here understand that once they get past the being scared phase of diving head first into everything.
~Lyro
LadyBelle (guest)
 
2 months ago (2018-12-20)
Hi Admiralblitz

Let me start by saying that I understand how you feel, even more I can relate to you.

No matter the cruelty we come across in this world, don't ever lose your inner identity. Don't lose your inner beauty because of people and situations we would categorize as bad. There's a reason you were born in this certain family and certain surroundings. I had asked myself before the same questions... Why was my sensitive soul put in a place of so much pain and injustice, when all I ever wanted was to give and receive love, work on creating a better world for better humanity? It didn't make any sense to me.
But, if I've learned something through all these experiences then it's to understand people around me better and being able to help them. If I hadn't gone through that, would I be able to empathize with the world around me all the way? To be completely honest, I'd like to change the entire world, but not being able to do that is kind of frustrating...there's so much to be done. Then again, you can make a change step by step, word by word. Even our corresponding here on this website is making a change. You never know how just one single word of yours will affect someone, in a positive way.
So, maybe coming to Earth in a human body makes some sense after all. We don't have all the answers, just puzzles we use to create bigger picture. Only one new puzzle can change our perspective, that's why I explore and seek new knowledge.
The home you're mentioning is actually inside of you, that's the love to/from your spiritual family/angels/tribe. Wherever you go, you carry it with you and that is what is giving you strength to go further. I've seen my spiritual family so I know it to be true.
Having visions in dreams is quite normal, there's nothing to worry about. Don't question your mind. Since you're able to "see" through dreams, then you can try something: before falling asleep, ask your spiritual family/angels a question and ask them to remember the dream when you wake up in the morning. Dreams are a great way for communication with spiritual realm, for getting messages.
Yo can also read about clairvoyance.
I also find home and peace in nature and art/music. So, I can completely understand you in the part where you could spend the whole day in the nature just walking or looking at the sky. Whenever you need to recharge your batteries or think you cannot endure any more - just go there - it will always give you the soothing feeling of home and comfort.

Advice: don't waste your energy on fitting in, that's not why you're here and it will only hurt you more. Rather waste your energy on being who you truly are, your authentic self. To express your very beautiful essence - your true identity- is why you're here. There's a warrior inside of you growing, and all that you're feeling now is transforming into a weapon for changing things to better.

Stay well:-)
If you want to talk more or need an advice, I am always at your disposal.

Kind regards
LadyBelle

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