I'm sorry if I end up sounding so vague and confusing that no one understands me, but I hope someone will get my point and ideally, have similar feelings. Partly, I guess I just need to clear my head and for someone to hear me out.
I don't even know how to start, but I guess the simple way is to say that my sensitivity level has gone through the roof - and I don't mean sensitivity in an emotional sense, but the other kind (forgive me if I sound so extremely stupid, I'm not familiar with any terminology or anything). I also don't mean it in an empath sort of way, since empathy is the last of my skills. I guess I'd describe it as a very clinical kind of sensitivity, since at times it feels like I'm looking at the world through a glass and I just SEE it and understand the way it works. And these times have drastically increased since I was 14 (when they first started) and now, most of my time I'm in a daze and end up loosing time because of it.
And lately it hasn't been just the world in a general sense; it's progressed into people and I don't know what to do. My friends are talking about something and suddenly I start staring at them and my mind just wanders off until nothing can reach it. But when I come out of it, I can remember the conversation perfectly and somehow understand it and my friends' feelings and what they were thinking at the time and WHY they said what they said. I'm getting confusing again, I'm sorry.
Don't get me wrong, I don't want to get rid of this (and I apologize for making it sound like some nasty disease) - whatever this is - since it has given me lots of new perspective on life, but I need to learn how to control it. I can't go on wandering off whenever my subconscious feels like it. So, any tips? I've tried meditation but so far it has only ended up making me wander off even deeper.
But anyway, thank you for reading. I really don't have anyone to talk about this, especially since I don't even understand it myself. If you need to ask something, I'll try to answer as fast as possible. Thanks again.