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Empathy, Telepathic Dreams, And Being A Healer

 

Since I was a young child, I knew that I was "different" than other kids and that I had sensations and experiences that were not normal for my classmates. Other little girls talked about being a hair stylist, a ballerina, an astronaut, or a doctor. My oldest and dearest dream was to be a magical healer. I remember daydreaming that I was a princess with a lovely singing voice and when I sang for my kingdom, a strong white light descended on the crowd and everyone who was poor, sick, elderly, or frightened felt uplifted and strong and happy.

It wasn't until the age of 27 that I had real explanations for my "abilities." Prior to that point, the only available reasons for my depression and sense of being "different" were insanity (I thought that I was crazy for many years despite being in touch with reality because my sense of things seemed more intense and different than other peoples') or mental illness (depression and anxiety, to be specific). I rarely talk about my empathic experiences and my dreams because I know many people are skeptical of psychic abilities and I'm sensitive about being considered "crazy." I also have trouble talking about them because they have caused me a lot of distress, confusion, and pain.

A few traumatic things occurred in my childhood that are linked to empathic abilities. My parents divorced and my mother subsequently had a 4-year relationship with an abusive man. She told me once that I was her best confidante, despite being in grade school, because I always understood her emotions, no matter how "adult" they were, and because I always "knew" when she was having problems with him, even when she didn't tell me. I strongly suspect that my depression as a child came partly from living with adults who were self-destructive and depressed and picking up on their feelings without knowing I was doing it. I also felt a lot of pressure to "heal" my mother and to act as her adviser, even though her adult problems were too much for me, and had trouble forgiving myself for my failure to "fix" her issues.

At school, I always attracted friends who came from troubled or broken homes and frequently felt drained by them. I didn't understand that empaths naturally give off energy and it can become depleted. Since I could feel other people's pain to the extent that it seemed like my own, I wanted to help and heal everyone and felt frustrated when I couldn't make everything better. Frequently I took on other people's pain and anger and began to have extremely low self-esteem because I attributed all of the negative emotions with myself. I thought something was "wrong" with me that I experienced so much pain and negative emotions.

In college I began to come to terms with my abusive childhood and then other abilities began to surface. I have what are called "telepathic dreams." I dream about things that a person hasn't told me - friends, family members, and mere acquaintances. I have dreamed about people's physical ailments, emotional distress, mental illnesses, and even memories. I don't always know when a dream is "telepathic" but many of my dreams have been verified. (For example, I dream that a person has a heart attack and later find out that the person has a heart condition.) I have also dreamed about very disturbing, dark, and scary things and this ability started to frighten me. There are things I don't want to know about people, but at least it helped me end relationships with individuals who may have been dangerous.

I also began "overhearing" people's thoughts - I will occasionally think of something out of the blue, even things about strangers that make no sense to me, and the thought will turn out to be true later. (Example: I spend time with a very pretty girl and suddenly think, "This girl hates her body" and she later tells me that she had an eating disorder in high school because she "hates her body.") I also sometimes say "the right thing at the right time" to make someone feel better, and it's always because a thought pops into my head and I make a comment without thinking about it.

A pagan friend of mine taught me how to put up a "shield" to protect myself from psychic attacks, but now I have a shield up almost all the time. It's always up in public or in groups so that I don't become overwhelmed by other people's feelings, and I also put it up when people close to me are in pain. I don't even do this consciously - it has become instinct. It's draining and I struggle to open up to even my closest friends and relatives.

I feel unbearably vulnerable and sensitive; I feel like people perceive me as "weak" and "overly emotional." It's hard to make friends because people have very extreme reactions to me - they either love me right away or feel very uncomfortable with me. It's almost like people sense that I know too much about them, that I can see past their defenses, and people who aren't comfortable with themselves don't want me around to expose them. It causes many social problems. I feel rejected and people with low self-esteem tend to feel threatened by me and spread hurtful rumors. I have trouble defending myself from that kind of thing because I can always "feel" their unhappiness and can't bring myself to cause more by standing up to them. I have lost several groups of friends over my inability to stand up to people who bully me or feel threatened by me.

I have learned by now that simply "knowing" things about people and experiencing their pain and is not the same as being able to help people or heal people. Does anyone else have experience with being "open" to their empathic abilities and to other people while still protecting themselves from negative emotions? Does anyone else have tips on how to heal people without draining their own energy? I am afraid that I'm becoming bitter, closed off, and frightened by my own abilities and that I'm not using them to understand, love, and nurture people.

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Comments about this clairvoyant experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Aletheia, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

Heba (1 posts)
 
8 years ago (2011-11-07)
ooooh MY God finally I discover I'm not crazy. Really I am more than happy to understand what was happening to me. I am a healer but I read there is more than one type of a healer. I don't know how to find my type but first I have to share my experience. Since I was a child I knew there is something wrong (we all do). I can feel others pain as if they are mine. I give advice to my mother, my father and a lot of other older people. Animals are attracted to me; cats,rats,birds and even insects:) I dreams about snakes all the time but in my dreams we are friends they can't do me a harm. I can read thoughts and dream about the others problem. I don't know whether I am a healer of animals or the listener of humans type. I can give you some advices.
1. If you feel you are drained then you have to go and communicate with nature. Sit between trees or beside a lake of so.
2. Meditation helps a lot look to sky or nature and praise Allah
3.prayers also will make you feel better.
4.You need love don't be alone or afraid no you have to mingle with people even it means to act a little bit that you are the same. But when you have friends and feel loved really you will feel better.
5 don't be afraid to stand up for what you believe if you aren't yet that strong then wait and you will be.
ibright (1 stories) (10 posts)
 
9 years ago (2010-09-25)
Google CRYSTALS: quartz crystals, apache tear, obsidian, tigers eye, aquamarine... Follow your heart and choose one best for you... Crystals have helped me tremendously
b_luvedbaby (1 stories) (3 posts)
 
9 years ago (2010-07-15)
Wow, I read your story and I can completely relate! You already read my story, but things you talked about are things I never even thought about. I have also always felt like I was too sensitive and also struggle with standing up to people because I don't want to hurt them anymore than I can tell they already are. I could give so many examples on how I can relate, but this is your story, not mine. It is a relief though to know that I'm not the only one who feels these things. To hear someone else say the same things that I feel makes me feel a little less closed off from the world. I'm very curious about this shield that your friend taught you and would like to hear more.
psychicAngel (guest)
 
9 years ago (2010-07-12)
Just reading back over all these posts, I can't help feeling something I've been thinking for weeks - all of us have these incredible experiences which are often so much in isolation - I've been able to answer lots of questions but never, why so many people all over the world going through it alone and not living in the same neighbourhood etc who get to meet etc? I think its a lot to do with you can't just come out with: hey I'm psychic, want to chat about it?
This online community though, does prove that we are not alone - we are all, all over the world feeling similar things!
Thank God for here... We were eventually brought together as meant to be...
psychicAngel (guest)
 
9 years ago (2010-07-12)
Since I was a young child I also knew that I was "different" - I tried to hide it but got bullied terribly for it, because I couldn't hide it. As I got older I got better at hiding it but I was very confused and struggled for many years with coming to terms with my ability because I grew up in a very difficult situation with two very demanding parents, each with massive issues that it was expected I would resolve an that I frequently took on too much trying to resolve. My sensitivity made me like an emotional sponge and those dysfunctional parent relationships made me think I had to make everybody better and that if I didn't it was somehow my fault and I had failed. This is to do with being a parent when you are supposed to be a child, living freely and enjoying your childhood, and my parents making it virtually impossible to be anything other than an adult at 6 years old upwards.

I didn't know other children who had my abilties and was already a very shy child. This meant I became very isolated on top of being around parents who isolated me with their demands, so I never really gelled with other children and so I never got to appreciate and share about aspirations. I was also very focused on my abilities, not fully consciously and knowing I had a different purpose in life and that feeling I didn't fit in must have been happening ofr a reason. Of course, I know that more confidently now but as a child this was very traumatic.

Like you, it wasn't until my early to mid-twenties that I had any - fuller, rather than real in my case - explanations for my "abilities." Various mental health difficulties and and anxiety were a response to trauma. Trauma does bring out empathic and psychic abilities, and I know that my path was ordained to enable my development.

Here is the only place I talk about my telepathic, premonition, empathic and mediumistic experiences because I have found people to be very skeptical, even mocking and have been attacked for my abilities so that I am less open and a lot more cautious that some people are ignorant and have issues such as anger, which I am an easy victim to vent on. I too am sensitive to being called "crazy." so I keep people at arms length as part of self-preservation... Its understandable I feel. I love people, but I've learned, like you, loving people doesn't mean always getting fully involved in their lives. It is easy, for us both, to have an urge to want to heal people, but our journey is to prepare by recognising those who really need it and remaining objective about loving ourselves as much as we want to care for and love others, so as not to be exploited and abused ourselves. Sadly, not everybody is honest and there are those who will gladly take to our detriment. I learned to love myself more, having these gifts.

Right in to my late twenties I always attracted draining friends who came from very troubled backgrounds and frequently felt drained by them, to the point of often becoming very ill.

It is so good that you learned that empaths naturally give off energy and it can become depleted, and quite easily I am sure you will have found out too. When you said: 'Since I could feel other people's pain to the extent that it seemed like my own, I wanted to help and heal everyone' - I could so relate.

Especially: 'Frequently I took on other people's pain and anger and began to have extremely low self-esteem because I attributed all of the negative emotions with myself. I thought something was "wrong" with me that I experienced so much pain and negative emotions'.
There is definately nothing wrong with you and I am just so sorry you seemed to have such a lonely experience of having your gifts. You are obviously very sensitive and caring.

Similar to yourself, I am extremely telepathic... I can hear mind talk, and while enlightening, it has also been disturbing at times, because I have heard people's real thoughts..., sometimes really horrible, critical, jealous thoughts. This has been my protection, but not being able to tell anyone or attempting to hint I can do this and being encouraged to suppress it, made me very unhappy.

Being out in public can be a real challenge!
I am no longer overwhelmed so much but when I am in close proximity I cannot shut it ooff and I don't feel I need to.

When you say: 'I feel unbearably vulnerable and sensitive' - this is understandable. But you are not alone on here. You are definately not "weak" or "overly emotional."

You can make friends on here, that is a start I hope. But I do understand when it comes to people having extreme reactions to you. This can be very painful. They feel uncomfortable around you because you see the truth about them and that can cause extreme reactions like instant anger out of defensiveness/fear. People do sense that you know too much about them.

People being threatened by you will automatically go on the attack in many cases and start bullying you. It happened to me when I saw a boy across the street ffrom me when I was a kid: I felt this tremendous suffering from him, then he suddenly started verbally attacking and threatening me out of the blue, after me and his sister being friendly. I kept getting this happen over and over. It conditioned me to be very afraid of being me and being real but obviously years later, I have learned to get better at not taking their stuff on as mine but it still hurts like anything.

I really want you to know that when you said: 'I am afraid that I'm becoming bitter, closed off, and frightened by my own abilities'... That really do empathise.

You are not alone in this and I would like to encourage you to really call out to your Maser Guide and helpers to show and help you sense just how very close to you they are and so that you see them around you when you feel the worst of these feelings you describe.

It can be very distressing not having people around who understand and accept your abilities, especially on the levels that you have them - I experienced a lot of jealousy because I am so very developed - so your Master Guide and helpers are essential family. They truly understand and care - to the point they feel absolutely every iota and moment of your feelings.

I hope this helps you.
pegs_deborah (3 stories) (112 posts)
 
9 years ago (2010-07-11)
Wow, can I relate to your story. I'm 32 and only recently within the past couple of years have I come to understand just how much being empathic/psychic has affected my life.

I also come from a troubled childhood in that the adults in my life were depressed alcoholics who were occasionally abusive to each other and me. I also attract friends who are troubled and somehow end up "draining" me of energy. I always find myself trying to "heal" everyone. People always tell me they feel calmer and "at peace" around me. I'm working on trying not to empathically heal the world and everyone I come into contact with simply because by doing so I think I tend to deprive people of their learning opportunities in life. Sometimes pain and mistakes are a good thing - we learn from them. I will admit though that this is a work in progress.

I have precognitive dreams. I dream the future. I have ever since I can remember. I can't remember a time when I didn't know the future. Currently, I'm really having difficulty dealing with my precognitive dreams more so than my empathic nature.

I know this will sound cliche'd and I believe one person might have already mentioned this but... Try meditation. Even if you can only do 5 minutes. It helps. Also, try walking in nature or being outside in nature. Nature helps because it's grounding for people like us. On really difficult days, try going outside in your backyard. Take off your shoes and socks and stand with your bare feet on the grass or the dirt. Stand there for as long as you feel need to and feel the energy of mother earth rising through your feet up your spine and encompassing your whole body.

Hope this helps.
HaruNoTsuki (guest)
 
9 years ago (2010-07-10)
its all right. Do not worry. It is not wrong that you can not use your abilities to heal often but it is wonderful that you can at least understand people. Up until now I did not understand myself but I think I have something similar to your ability. It is good that you know what people go through, and you can help them with your own physical power if you can not heal them mentally. The fact that you want to heal people makes you a very kind person.
your soul will pass on to heaven when the time comes.
Adaryn7 (6 stories) (460 posts)
 
9 years ago (2010-07-10)
Aletheia:

Your story touched me very deeply--my experience of life, friends, empathy and growing up is very similar to yours. I also believe that you raise a very important point: I don't believe that genetics play the most important part in who we are and what abilities we have. I think genetics and life-experience go hand in hand.

For example, I didn't develop strong senses about people until I had a few bad experiences. Since then, like you, my feelings about others seem rarely to be wrong.

As for being empathic, I'm glad you've developed a shield. For people like us whom are very sensitive to the energies of others, a shield is absolutely a necessity. I was once trying to study in the library with a friend, and I just couldn't focus. Though it was completely silent, I felt bombarded. I became stressed and anxious, and completely unable to focus. After I took myself outside, I felt better. It was exam time, and I believe that feeling the stresses and worries of all the studying students around me was just too much--perhaps this is how it is for you, too. When I rejoined my fried, I looked at one girl and saw a deep, moody-blue aura flash above her head.

Thankyou for posting, I believe every word of your story. Remember, there are plenty of people here whom will be able to relate to you and/or will be happy to help. Please email me if you would like someone to talk to about your experiences.

Blessed be
Adaryn7
HaVeN (guest)
 
9 years ago (2010-07-09)
Yah another empathic healer. You sound exactly like me. I attract friends that have problems. I read peoples thoughts to. I am a psychic vampire though. Ca nyou teac hme how to make a shield. I need one because the emotions are too overwhelming.

Love HaVeN ❤ 😊 ❤
Aisatsana (7 stories) (24 posts)
 
9 years ago (2010-07-08)
I can relate really well to your story. I'm an empath as well and it's always a struggle to handle overly emotional people. I've also noticed that I also made friends with people who were emotionally hurt or scarred, or just someone who needed a friend to heal them. The sad thing though was that whenever they were healed they tended to move on.

I'm also a psychic dreamer, though most of my dreams have been disturbing. Usually my psychic dreams involve spirits who contact me in them, or premonitions of a bad future. I've had OBE's as well as dreams of a past life and death. Those usually come with phantom pains.

I don't know about the healer part, but I always have had this trick that whenever I was having bad cramps, I would hold my hand about an inch above my stomach and my pain would warm away.

I don't really know much about the give and take of being an empath, but for me personally, I find I'm recharged after I've immersed myself in nature. For me, my favorite place to go and relax is the Ocean and nature centers. Just being surrounded by the energy of mother nature helps give me a boost. Don't know if it would work for you, but it's worth a shot.

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