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The Sleep Paralysis


I think I have been given the opportunities to see and feel something more then with the usual senses. But I definitely wasn't prepared for it when it started to happen. I didn't understand it. I always was very sensitive, rather introvert and preferred being on my own, therefore more open perhaps. When I was an adolescent I did read a couple of books about OBE, NDE and past lives but I don't remember I have ever read about the lucid dreams and sleep paralysis. I heard about these terms for the first time only about a year ago.

Yeah, I was fascinated by all those altered states and some OBE experiences but I was very uneducated in this area, so I didn't know how to deal with it, because I didn't have it under the control; it was happening to me involuntarily. Especially the sleep paralysis were something dreadful. I was petrified I will just stay there, horrible, horrible feeling. I couldn't deal with it. When I was researching and reading about some lovely lucid dreams where one can do and feel everything beautiful and can be whatever he wants and shape his subconscious in order to influence his daily waking life I felt like it was a lie. Mine were overtaking me and I didn't feel it like the dreams at all. I wouldn't class them even as a night mares, though.

Maybe I have already mentioned I used to be depressed as an adolescent and I actually wanted to leave my body during one or two nights. I am an empath and that was supposed to be a solution to the overwhelming feelings. I think I would have never committed suicide as that seemed far too violent to me, but I was thinking about dying calmly in the sleep. I don't remember how that happened (and it was an irony) but I actually discovered something what has stopped me to take my life - those hypnotic waves and something beyond. I was fascinated by that altered state. And since then it started - I was attuning myself to it during some nights before I fell asleep even if I didn't want to or it overruled me during the sleep. I can sense many levels, I can hear many different waves and I can't understand it. There are many different states/levels/brain waves or whatever call it I am getting into and I don't know which one is which. Even if I would know I don't think I would understand myself better. I can distinguish when I am having OBE, definitely sleep paralysis, lucid dreaming when it starts and I can just watch my dream, but there seems to be a few more weird states.

I remember the one of the worst sleep paralysis I had when I was 18:

I just got from one sleep paralysis after a few dreamy attempts (as usually) to wake up and was fully awake but I could sense all those waves dragging me back there into that weird sleep, because I couldn't stop listening the throbbing of my blood in my ears and also hearing that white noise. It is like that game "think of a purple elephant" and then "don't think of the purple elephant" and only thing you can think of is a purple elephant. Same it was with those sounds, I just couldn't disconnect from them, I couldn't stop listening to them. I was fully awake and in my body but I felt how I am getting almost into trans, it was taking me back to that weird sleep. I got back there - where I was aware of my body and energy body - and then I was trying to get back to reality to woken state, to get up, to wake up because I was awake but not really awake and panicking again.

I tried to switch on the light on the wall and my hand went through the wall. Ok, so I am still not awake, I thought. I tried again after a moment when I though I actually was really awake and was trying to get up and the lamp became like a rubber, it was impossible to press the switcher. But I WAS awake, I thought! I tried again, I sat up, I was reaching for the lamp and the lamp became sticky like a chewing gum this time. Total madness. I was desperate. Then I had a feeling I am finally really awake and I went into the living room where my mum was sleeping. I tried to wake her up, but she was like some rubbery chewy dead body, which terrified me, because I have realized I am still not back, it was still a dream! (Now I am thinking - was it possible that I was in my astral body moving there but not really knowing I had no body or was it really some kind of mad lucid dream?) I didn't know what was happening then so my perceptions were different than they would be now.

When I finally got back I was a wreck. I cried and cried and my mum came to help me. She was talking to me but I remember I was just repeating 'I don't want to fall asleep ever'. I was scared I will not come back here. My mum was very open minded and understanding. I am glad she is open to all those things so she didn't drag me to see the psychologist to get some pills into me. I am very grateful for it. I can hardly imagine how I would act if anyone like me would wake me up and would be getting this crazy in the middle of night. She saw the state I was in, I was very distressed and crying, so she said, she will sleep on the floor next to my bed and will be holding my hand so I could safely fall sleep. God bless my mum!

But I got there again, very fast, this time it was more like a lucid dream state, because I didn't concentrate so much on my energy body but rather on the crazy dreams coming through which I was just observing. This actually was horror like dream - mine and my mum's body were naked and like dead in some weird positions sort of hanging from the ceiling like in the weird swings, it was happening in the room, then I 'was' in the room and trying to do backward roll in the corner near the ceiling. That actually felt like my energy body, because I could feel that energy like movement inside me. I don't get it but to me it was like a phase of a lucid dream followed by the OBE and again and at some points almost blending into each other. It has finished as a sleep paralysis and took me a while to really, really wake up. My mum was still holding my right little finger and I saved my hand from that strong hold or at least it felt like it. I could feel the weird pain in my little finger. I cried again, was agitated and pleased my mum to never hold me again, because those "dreams" were then even worse somehow violent when her energy was involved. She slept calmly during my states and she felt sorry she couldn't help me. Was I getting crazy? I felt fear. I was scared of myself. I didn't know what to do, how to normally sleep? My mum suggested I would pray. I really didn't know any prayer, so she was saying verse by verse and I was repeating it and felt better. I am not Christian but at that point I needed something bigger to believe in. Since then I BELIEVE in God but I name God differently because I didn't come through that Christian tradition, studying the bible, etc. Although my mum did. For me IT is The Creator, The love, The Loving Light, Everything what is, The Universe etc.

My mum knew I am not mad, but she advised me not to talk about it with anyone who is too down-to-earth. I mentioned this to my older friend (he was teaching me English in my country, isn't this a Coincidence? I always used to have almost a generation older friends I could talk to) and he said that my astral body is maybe too released. But I thought it was because I could hear those waves which were taking me there?

Anyway a few people I told some of my stories said it sounded like I was on some magic mushrooms. I just want to point out that I have never been taking any drugs and I feel totally sane. I am sensitive but quite analytical, too. And if I feel weird about talking about the Angels or The Light it is mainly because most people around me are complete atheists and they don't even want to believe in anything. Which I think is detrimental.

I am still occasionally having those sleep paralysis or dark energy dragging me down into the darkness when I feel a tiny bit of fear. I couldn't get out of their reach many times because the fear had paralyzed me which helped them. It almost felt like they were happy I was there, they were like waiting, taking energy off me. They were touching me, they were all around me, overwhelming me and they were very heavy and dark. A few times I actually felt how they touched or strongly viciously grabbed my face or my hands and it felt very real. (Thinking about it now, maybe some of them just wanted my attention, but my fear stopped me to help them?) I also somehow realized if I would ever commit suicide I could be there, in that heavy darkness, in the no-where space and waiting, forever stuck on that level. I believe there are many energies sort of lost and I am afraid they want my help. I feel extremely sorry for them, especially those who took their own lives, but I don't feel strong enough myself, yet. (I can't believe I am actually writing this, because I know everyone "normal" would want to get me into the straitjacket and subscribe medication...!)

Could it be that when someone gets more aware of his astral body but it happens during or in between the phases of lucid dreaming he is actually sort of released from the body but because he doesn't know about it, is still in or very near his body and can be more susceptible towards the lower astral level...? That level tends to be darker, heavier and that's why we can be or feel more endangered. We didn't want it, we don't understand it. We are less prepared than experienced astral travellers who just consciously lift their energy up and get off the body. It could be like a metaphor for a spiritual growth? Going from the physical body to astral body and we need to lift up through the heaviest energy level (bad one) and go up towards the light. I was there somewhere in some plane many times, experiencing paranormal things, other beings and not feeling in a charge of it at all.

I know the fear is the worst enemy ever plus we are un/fortunately personally responsible for it, for the negative thoughts causing it, which makes me think - why did the fear appear in the first place? Why does the fear exist? Why do people have fear, I mean generally? Is it because we went through something, regardless it was from the past lives or this life? Or could it be some general info from the collective consciousness we are getting? That's why we have fears? Do we need to fear at all?

I apologize for the length again.

Thank you for reading.

Love and blessings


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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, MarciSt, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

booya (1 stories) (3 posts)
12 years ago (2010-12-01)
Hello! Thanks for posting this! I've been trying Astral Projection or OBE for some time now but I always fail! Anyway My friend Has this special ability too of naturally Astral projecting. The bad part is that whenever he is out of his body, he always experience bad stuffs. One time he opened up to us that one night he just woke up floating and he couldn't move. Then he looked at the mirror and said that he saw a horse like entity with four horns and having a white torn out shirt. Then he wake up. After that he woke up and cried. The next incident of him having this kind of experience is that He woke up again but this time he wasn't floating. He was at his school building and have seen a child in white shirt and was faceless. The child ran up the hallway and up the stairs. So he followed the child and upon reaching him, he asked "why am I here? Who are you and how do I get back?" the child then answers. "I can't tell you because you already saw him" My friend began to feel such fear and then saw the child transform to the horse like with 4 horns entity. And then he woke up then went to his mom and cried.

I told him that he was out of his body and that there are entities in the astral realm. Although I haven't tried it yet, My research about the astral realm and astral projection helped me in discussing what was happening to him. I told him that if he happen to go out of his body, he must surround himself with white light and that he can travel to happier places than just dwell inside his fear.

I'm sorry for the long story but I think that it has some similarities with your story.

From what I've researched, you must confront your fear. Also keep in mind that there are a lot of great things in the astral realm than fear. I hope that I can astrally project one day and fly! Haha! Anyway If you have and advices on me on how to astral project please visit my story:)

Thanks Marci for posting this again and Godbless!
Diannee26 (1 stories) (2 posts)
12 years ago (2010-11-30)
I have had one... Wait... A couple of sleep paralysis. First, I went to bed and then I thought of something to dream about... After dreaming, I'm on the stage of really shutting down and sleep. But right before that, My eyes suddenly opened as wide as it can. It was really hard to move my body parts but I managed to move my hand and I touched my face, It's like my face loosing it's sense of feeling! I couldn't feel anything at all! It's like touching another persons face! And after a second I couldn't move! But I was still breathing, I struggle to scream but nothing came out of my mouth not even a sound. Then, this split second ~ I couldn't breath anymore! It was horrible! I used all my strength to move, scream and breath! I was forgetting who I was. For a second I thought "THIS IS IT..." and then suddenly I came back to earth slowly... First, tears came out of my eyes, I started breathing, moving, then, I heard a sound from my mouth! I was relieved! And I was soooo exhausted for giving all the energy that I have, that I just started sleeping.
Thebigm (8 stories) (32 posts)
12 years ago (2010-11-29)
Hey Marci,

Just wanted to reply to thank you for posting up your story.
Reading other experiences from other people help me to feel better about my own and to cope with my own fears.

What you've described is pretty scary and I'm not expert enough to give you any advice but what I can tell you is you're not alone.
Sometimes just having someone else confirm that is enough to help you get over your fears.

I too have had lucid dreams where I've been trapped and unable to wake up and had a few false awakenings.

One time recently I woke up in a strange room, with what I perceived to be my girlfriend beside me talking to me about losing my powers soon if I didn't act fast, it was strange. I realised I was dreaming and then I looked around the room and felt a complete loss of control and heard a screaming noise. I tried to wake up from it but couldn't. I eventually thought I'd woken up, walked to the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror, my face looked really different, distorted and strange. I realised again I was dreaming and walked back to the bedroom and into bed and then woke up properly this time.

Anyway, good luck with your travels  and thanks again for your story.

Mel33 (guest)
12 years ago (2010-11-26)
[at] SleepingBeauty
That's interesting. Did it actually feel like an earthquake? I sometimes wake up vibrating. It's mostly focused around my lips and I'll actually be making this buzzing sound. It's not a sound or a vibration that I can create on my own. I've tried. When this happens I also have a tingling sensation over my whole head, face and sometimes my body.
SleepingBeauty (1 posts)
12 years ago (2010-11-25)
sleep paralysis, hallucinations, and altered dream/wake states are all classic symptoms of narcolepsy. Do you also have problems with daytime sleepiness? I went and still go through all of what you are describing here. I feared sleep because of paralysis and hallucinations from the time I was 12 until I was diagnosed with narcolepsy at 18. I am now 26 and am coping much better now that I understand what is happening to me.

Now on a side note, I still believe that something more than just narcolepsy was happening to me. I always had the feeling that in those states "something" evil was trying to get me. The wierdest part was that when I slept with the Bible under my pillow I did not experience these episodes. I started back having the paralysis and looked and discovered the Bible had slipped between the bed and the wall to the floor. I put it back under my pillow and they stopped again. I dunno. Maybe coincidence maybe not.

Also, what AnneV wrote about vibrations feeling like earthquakes is kind of spooking me because once during sleep paralysis I experienced what felt like an earthquake. I just chalked it up to dreaming, though, because I live in Alabama and there are no earthquakes here. That was one of my scarier experiences. It freaked me out and to this day I never really new what had happened just that I felt an earthquake.

I dunno. Science and narcolepsy explain a lot but I know there is more to it. I plan to look into this ap thing.

SleepingBeauty~ ❤ ~
Newblood (1 stories) (202 posts)
12 years ago (2010-11-24)
Ok quick question when you dream and say some thing bad happens in your dream like that would cause pain do you awaken with the pain still when I was younger I would have very vivid dreams an when I wake I could still feel the pain some times.
Mel33 (guest)
12 years ago (2010-11-18)
Sometimes, what helps me if I'm stuck in my room or feeling threatened by other energies, I think of a trusted friend or someone that I feel can help me. For example, I've felt before that I was being attacked during an obe so I thought of a friend of mine. Before I knew it I was standing right in front of her. From there on out my astral travel was amazing. At least, that particular time. On a side note my friend happens to be a psychic/shaman.
bbdeathspark (4 stories) (617 posts)
12 years ago (2010-11-17)
What the... How did my comment reach here... I wasn't even on this story...glitch?
bbdeathspark (4 stories) (617 posts)
12 years ago (2010-11-17)
Also vavoom, if that's the way you think psychics should be, all open and trust worthy and what not, then your mistaken. That's like saying the same thing for "normal" humans. Just no.
ipromisedthesky (1 stories) (8 posts)
12 years ago (2010-11-17)
I go through some of the same stuff, so I'll be looking through the comments to see if anything can help me and you both. I just got out of one even though it wanted me back in it. This is why I go to sleep at like 5am and try to wake up as early as possible but never works. My alarm clocks can never wake me in sleep paralysis. I'm 18 now, and it happens a couple times each month. The first I had it was when I was like 14.

I read somewhere it has to do with sleep patterns, or sleeping on your back. I do realize that when I do get out of it I am on my back. But I don't like sleeping on my back to begin with, I usually sleep in fetal position on my left side facing the wall. Or on my belly.

The one I had before today was just abnormal. I couldn't even open my eyes. I was completely paralyzed and all I saw which pitch darkness and me at the center of it. I could hear things, but I couldn't do much about it since I couldn't see. I'm glad I'm not the only one who has to deal with sleep paralysis as scary as it is. I'm glad I'm not alone in this.
MarciSt (3 stories) (9 posts)
12 years ago (2010-11-17)
Thank you so very much, you can't even imagine, Anne, how you are helping me to understand it all. Within just a couple of days! It all makes such a great sense, of course!
Yesterday when I consciously lifted and flown away it felt thousand times better then just staying separated (but still in my body) in those frequencies where I was so easily endangered. I felt so light and airy. It felt so natural not to be in the body. I should have been doing this all the time and not just wait there and feel like squashed by that heavinness when I am as you said in the catatonic state. I was only scared and that state wasn't pleasant so that's why I always got into something bad.
The only thing is to figure out how to get back, but maybe I just need more experiences with astral travelling/projection and not to worry much about coming back. Maybe I have also fear that someone finds my 'sleeping' body and I won't be 'there'... Especially in the moments when I should not be 'out'.
I am just using my involuntary OBE to work with it consciously. Maybe I should try and do it again whenever I want and not whenever 'it' wants some day.
Other thing is, being higher is much more pleasant, but I am not in touch with the other heavier energies. And maybe I somehow subconsciously feel I should not be just playing around but helping.
But maybe I am first helping myself, right? After I will get more familiar maybe then, later...

Everything you said makes sense.

I don't think I fear death, but I dislike all violence and many deaths seem somehow cruel (accidents, murders, World War 2 - seems like it holds some memories for me).

I don't think anything is an accident. I just wish I could understand everything now.
I have allways been impatient.:) I am the type 'everything or nothing'. So going ahead very slowly, if.
But 'higher planes' here we come!

Thanks again.
Love and blessings xxxx
AnneV (4 stories) (1064 posts) mod
12 years ago (2010-11-17)
Other names for sleep paralysis (I call it the catatonic state) is hag syndrome or night terrors. The paralysis occurs because our mind is awake yet our body is mostly asleep. This is why even moving a finger is near impossible. This prevents injury while we sleep, but if we're mentally awake it becomes an invariable hell. You were correct when you said the unpleasantness was because it was a low vibrational frequency.

To re-live this state that you describe you're frequently in is hell itself and I am not speaking metaphorically. But like hell, we don't have to stay there. People in hell (whether they are in a self created hell here on earth or after they die) think that is all there is but that's not true. People who get out of this and travel to the higher planes are not liars. They just are not in hell.

Anyone who has a somewhat light bond between their physical shell and their astral body is going to end up in the catatonic state. This is very unpleasant but I did find a trick to taking it to the next level (projection). Despite the discomfort and fear, I would deaden my body even further still. If you're not astrally lifting up, it's because you're too connected still. Stop all thoughts and inner chatter. Focus on your third eye and completely stop talking to yourself. Even try and lower your pulse. This will create the vibrations that allow separation (and of course more fear because you're not used to these huge vibrations - they feel like an 8.0 earthquake). With practice, you can get to this state. And for goodness sake, if you get the vibrations, pull yourself out and get away from your room. This is extremely important. If you don't you'll end up back in the body and probably catatonic again!

So why practice AP? I practice it because I too am going to die and leave this earth. We can leave it utterly afraid, ignorant and dwelling in the lower planes, thinking this is it, or we can learn that we're more than our physical body, how to overcome fear, learn love, and ascend to a much higher realm! You chose what you want.

Fear is caused by the ego. The ego fears death. Plain and simple. All fear is surrounded by that. We fear aging because we're closer to death. We fear the boogey man because he's going to kill us. We fear rejection because then we can't procreate or be part of a family and that's death too. It's all ego and when the soul/spirit moves beyond the ego's grip (realizing there is no true death) then significant spiritual growth can happen.

Do you think this is some accident you're tackling this in your life?

Be well.

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