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Empath or Imaginary


I'm young, 16 going on 17 and lately I've noticed more now than ever that I'm very affected by the emotions around me. I was even severely depressed when I was 13/14 because of the raw tension in my home. My parents are going through a very nasty divorce and have never been loving, thus I feel that those emotions were reflected onto me. In one instance, after my parents were through yelling at me and telling me how disappointed they were in me, I actually felt so horrible that I contemplated suicide. Now, when the tension in the house is at its thickest, I find myself becoming physically ill and am unable to even stay in the same room as my unstable father.

I've always been somewhat tender hearted, but I'm not so sure anymore. I was wondering if I was in fact an empath? I can't even watch movies that I know will end badly or have an extremely sad part because I know that I will burst into tears or end up feeling the emotions of the characters. I find this happens even more so when I'm reading a book. I react so strongly to what the characters are feeling that when a character's sad, I feel constriction in my chest, when there's a particularly exciting scene, I feel the need to jump out of my chair and act it out or something crazy along those lines, and so on...

I don't really think that I've sensed the emotions when I was into a room or anything like that. I can tell if the room's relaxed, tense, etc... But I assume everyone can do that?

I'm also unclear as to if I'm reading a person's emotions or am just undoubtedly good at reading a person's face. Whichever is the case, anyone can give me a problem about a relationship or anything dealing with emotion and I can work through it with them and come up with the correct course of action. I'm told by my friends that my uncanny knack has never steered me wrong when I was giving them advice. Am I just very level-headed and logical or is this something more?

Could someone please tell me what's going on? I'm so confused... And if I am in fact an empath, could someone tell me how to develop and control it so it's not so out of control all the time?

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Timfaraos (426 posts)
8 years ago (2015-02-19)
Don't worry! I know parents shouldn't fight in front of the kids, especially before the kid's bedtime. But there are people out there who had a much rougher childhood than you, but they grew up to be happy adults. (although true happiness is only in heaven!) Just try to get nearer to God, read and DO the bible, psalms. Pray, and the demons will flee from you. Visit website: 'real life angel and demon encounters'. Timfaraos [at]
edub82391 (1 posts)
13 years ago (2010-04-05)
if you would like I could tell you how I deal with the emotions see everything you said I have been through so if you still need help email me ethanwilliams82391 [at]
wolfteen (10 posts)
14 years ago (2009-02-07)
WOW! That's kind odd. I'm only 14 but everything you desribed I've been though maybe we should talk. I've been an empath since I was about 5. I've been written off as outcast but I think its odd how we both are/went through the same thing
UKbabe24 (1 posts)
14 years ago (2008-09-13)
I've just found this website and can gladly now explain some of the things that have been happening to me.

I thought I was a bit mad to be honest, but now I realise that perhaps I have running away from this somewhat. I seem to reflect what other people feel or at least know / feel how they feel.

Like for example my friend introduced me to another friend of hers and I immediately knew this guy was completely and utterly in love with her. It wasn't anything he said or did, it was something that hit me the instant I met him. I'd never met this guy in my life and wondered whether to tell my friend but something told me she knew. A week later she told me all the above and asked my advice.

It works the other way though. I used to live in a house that was full of negative energy, the landlady wasn't exactly the most positive person in the world and I've now realised that I was probably absorbing her negative emotion. I always knew when she was home because I'd feel anxious walking to the door. If she wasn't there, I was OK. At first.

I ended up in therapy because I developed General Anxiety Disorder. I couldn't deal with all that negative emotion and it really effected me. I'm much better now but at least I can put a label to what I've been feeling and know I'm not an emotional wreck of a psycho!

Strangely enough I've had prediction dreams and stuff for years and that freaks me out less than the empathy thing! The method I've started using that seems to work is to change my state of mind. Thinking positively rather than getting "sucked in" to a black hole of emotion everytime I talk to someone who's feeling particularly negative seems to help me control it better. Sort of like a positive mental filtering system! I also acknowledge what I'm feeling, I've noticed that when I try to ignore it one's gift decides to step it up a notch!

Take care everyone.

Xxx ❤
dparts (3 posts)
14 years ago (2008-07-16)
i'm an empath to but I use to want to get rid of the abilty because my life was so messed up back then. Nowq I want to have it back (a part of me thinks I got rid of it but I know I didn't) my question is (in a way of saying) how do you dig it back up?
vendettaBabes (3 stories) (335 posts)
14 years ago (2008-07-15)
isn't empathy the perfect example for something that is a gift and a curse at the same time?

It allows you to help people, have a better understanding of the human mind, and makes you feel pretty special, for most empaths are rather selfless, caring and loving. Of course, it also makes you very emotional and makes you feel guilty about other people's troubles, not to mention that we can actually get sick because of other people. You have the ability to heal, to love greatly, and to help others, but at the same time you must deal with the fact that you will always be able to know more of people than they wish you to know and have to deal with others' feelings. Trust yourself, and accept yourself, it will help. I tried it when I got to the point where I felt so lonely and scared about my abilities that I could no longer find happiness, and almost imidiately after I did, I felt peace and was able to control my gifts better, now I use them to help classmates who have trouble, them wanting to tell me their issues for no reason does make helping them easier. And every now and again, my abilities help me when I need to know if a certain person really means to help me or just hurt me. Learn to love your empathy, and it will open the doors to a world so full of happiness and understanding that it will make you doubt how you could have ever been scared of your powers. Enjoy them, they can be great. You just need to let them, OK? Good luck. And don't forget, there is always help out there and people who want and CAN help you. Chao! 😁
FirexIce (guest)
15 years ago (2008-01-26)
i know exactly what you mean, I have always noticed that I could read people very well, and know their true intentions and know how they feel at a level I found strange. I didn't find it strange as I assumed everyone could, but as I got older and told my friends about it, they just thought I was playing and didn't really know what I was saying. I felt their confusion naturally and I tried to not say much about it anymore. Though now as I have gotten older it has gotten stronger, its like I can see and feels peoples emotions through their eyes, almost like I can read their minds. I am currently 15 and at first I thought I was imagining things, but I told them what they were thinking, and how they felt and they were amazed because they were thinking about that. I'm still not sure how this works but I am deeply affected by others emotions. I have tried to control this a bit, and can now manage to separate my emotions from those around me, but not all the time. I just have to really look within myself &find my emotions and everyone else's. Its easier if you mediate to know your energy, from others. I'm still trying to figure out how I know what people are thinking, and all but if anyone has advice please help me. For a while I thought I was alone with all this, but I would enjoy advice please...
Gingerkiss (1 posts)
15 years ago (2007-12-30)
I'll start of with this I've just discoverd that I'm an empath. My friends always have said I have switch personalitys, one ware I'm realy nice and dizty, another ware I'm really mean and sarcastice. And one when I'm lazy and act very smart its not until know that I relised I pick up my friends personalitys. I also right a lot and I MEAN a lot try 345 pages in a story, some times it even scares me pecause I go throw the charaters emotions. Do you think I write because I'm picking up other people's emotions, another thing that scares me is when I start talking to my self as if acting out apart that I'm going to right next. I remember when I lost one my storys I don't know what came over me, it felt like a peace of my was missing it hurt so much... My friends have always came with me with there problems, and I some how always know the answers I know notice that most of the people drawn to me do have screwed up lifes. The worst is when I'm in malls I feel weighed down and my back starts hurting but when I get out sided it suddenly disapears. Can you help me I need some advise any thing am I crazy.
someone (guest)
15 years ago (2007-12-13)
I've always grown up also in a similiar environment as yours, and I believe it played a part in developing my ability as well. I believe I have possessed it a long time, but only within the last two or three years have I been really aware of it. Yes, it can be confusing. I for one, consider myself highly empathic, but also I believe myself to have telepathy as well, to a large extent, and they seem to compliment each other. People like us will be very exausted from crowds--try to be aware of yourself when you're among a lot of people. But what you can do is use your empathy is a positive way, to promote positive energy in others, only you probably will feel drained as you absorb their emotions yourself. And as Athena said, it is a good thing... Sometimes I've felt sort of out of place, or cursed by it, but you can do a lot of good.
black roses (guest)
15 years ago (2007-12-02)
ive just found out that I'm an empath I don't know how I new but I just new like when I watched this movie just the other day about this man who killed a tourched people for fun I felt so ill that I had 2 leave the room or when I'm in the mall I suddenly feel weighed down and my back starts to ech my uncle told me that are famliy was blessed but I didn't know he ment this I know relise why I cry so much and how some times I get so depressed I also contimplet suicied and also of that bat I can feel what another person feels or tell if they have good energy or bad or how many people come to me with there problems and I'm really good that I can solve them I feel content now knowing that I'm an empath and not just crazy!
who187 (guest)
15 years ago (2007-09-16)
how do I say this without sounding crazy I am just tired I am sure I am an empath but to call this a gift is so not true I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy if I had one, so many ways I been told that can help well if this is a gift we should not need any help and I have tried everything I don't want to feel others emotions I just want mine I just want my life back if I was offered this so called gift I would have said no.
hunnybunny (3 stories) (21 posts)
15 years ago (2007-08-05)
Ettare I may be just barly 14 but I also now what you are talking about... I have those same emotions. I aslo have times were my friends don't even have to tell me if there sad mad etc. I'm albe to help them out with there problems or at least make them feel better becuz of the emotions they can't feel or are rejecting. I am very confused to but hopefully I have someone help me or control it becuz there are times where someone if feeling very bad or depressed and I end up getting that same emotion... And your right about reading emotions off of people I do the same thing. If you wanna talk more just send me a message to my email : brokenheartbleeds [at]
hopefully we can get an answer to this...
love:kitty 😁
Athena (99 posts)
16 years ago (2007-04-13)
Dear Tiy and Angie, Thank you for your nice responses to my comment. It is greatly appreciated. Hope I could help.

Dear deathbykittens, Being empathic or "feeling" is not something you control, it is something you learn to integrate within your self, because it is already a part of you and the problem is that you do not yet know this. Much comes with age, experience, patience, research, seeking help from others, introspection, trial and error, practice and most of all discipline, not control so much as to "know" when to as Kenny Rogers lyrics say in his song "The Gambler",..."you've got to know when to hold 'em, know when to fold 'em, know when to walk away and know when to run".

Thank you all and be patient and keep practicing. If you are not making any mistakes, it means you are not out their living your life and using your unique gifts.
angie (3 stories) (23 posts)
16 years ago (2007-04-12)
wise words athena, I try to do all those things, but its hard sometimes, will have to keep working on it
love and light xx
deathbykittens (2 posts)
16 years ago (2007-04-11)
I myself am an empath. And the practicaly same symtomes as you. I think of what your telling me you are an empath. But how to control your power is not so simple or easey. I can't even truly control ability yet. My uncle gave me some advice. I hope it helps. "How do you calm a bull down?" I didn't know. "You give it space to run tieing it up woant help at all that will get it even more messed up..." That helped me a lot more. Then I looked up Empath on the computer and there was a web site with all this really good info. And what really helps so much is GOLD TOPAZ. It helps filter out negitive energy. I hope this helps. Sorry I can't put up the site link, It seems to be unavalable. So serch empath on yahoo or sompthing OK?
Tiy (guest)
16 years ago (2007-04-07)
Wise words Athena. *applauds* A lot of information to ponder and put to use in daily life.
Athena (99 posts)
16 years ago (2007-04-07)
Dear Ettare,

This is but my own opinion. Take some, all or none. It is always your choice.

It is normal to pick up on energies put forth by others, especially from parents, family members and friends. We are bombarded daily by such energies, both positive and negative. Of course, fighting in any form effects people in different ways, and even more so if you are an empath. The closer you are to the turmoil, the more likely the energies will leave an imprint upon you. This is why parents, who are chosen caretakers of children need to be responsible for the way they choose to settle disagreements. Preferably, not in front of the children. Children are more open, innocent and sensitive, and not yet attuned to the ways of the real world. Nobody at any age should have to be exposed to or bombarded by daily negative energies of any type. Unfortunately, the real world and human beings do not operate this way. Thus, Ettare, you need to surround yourself with people who love you, and seek guidance from those you trust and who can best counsel you. Let people know, including your parents that their behavior is hurting you. Work on your own self-esteem, speak up for yourself, let others know your boundaries and work towards a healing resolution. If the situation is too heated and negative, then tell those around you that you love them, but for your own well-being, you must leave the room or house, and then do it. Come back when things cool down. Know that your parent's marriage is not your responsibility, it is theirs. The negativity that you feel when they are fighting also belongs to them. You are at your best when you leave them with their stuff that belongs exclusively to them. You would not pick up a bag of garbage by the side of the road and bring it home, then why would you pick up the baggage of another person's energies.

Having the ability to be sensitive and empathic is something to be proud of. It is as wonderful and as needed as all other gifts that others also possess. Nobody is better than the other, we are just different in our specialities. We are all special. This just happens to be your specialtiy. Embrace it, learn about it, use it for yourself... To grow and to help others on their life's journey as well.

As a sensitive you may find it best to take more down time to be alone so that you can recharge your own energies. Learn to be quiet. Learn to meditate. Find your center, and choose your own spirituality. Do things within reason, balance and common sense. Do the basics like eat well, get plenty of needed sleep, drink water, exercise, and keep your immune system up. Keep your life and surroundings simple. Avoid electrical equipment within your bedroom. Make your environement a temple oasis just meant for you. Take long, cleansing warm/hot showers, baths or soaks. Use candles and fragrances you enjoy. Get out into nature and into the sun. Be with animals and children. Surround yourself and immerse yourself in all those simple things you love. Dance, listen to music, enjoy the arts, read, keep journals of your experiences, enjoy your favorite hobbies, use your curiousity and imagination and color outside of the lines anytime the opportunity presents itself. Be good to yourself and to others. Respect yourself and respect others. Respect all things, living and non-living. Always retain the child within yourself. Most of all, learn to know where to draw your boundaries with other people and how to say "no" and mean it. People pleasing does not do you well and for an empath it is highly energy draining. Let those close to you know about your journey so they can help you, especially reminding you that your energies need recharging. Listen, trust and use all of your senses including your sixth sense and the seventh one, common sense. Tell the truth, especially to yourself. Above all learn to love yourself, warts and all. If you work on exploring, exposing and looking at your own truth about your own fears and your own dark side, you will find the best gift. THat is the gift that lies within yourself. That gift is you. It always comes back to "you". That is where the lock and the key reside.

May I suggest to you that the first thing you do each morning when you awaken is to affirm, pray, think or speak out loud your intention of having a great day, and imagine it to be so. Then... Imagine yourself totally emersed and encased in a cocoon of protective white or purple colored light. Now, surround that with mirrors relecting outward, so that all the energies are reflected back to those who own them, and your energies stay with you and are at the ready when you decide to release them to share with others. The protection that encircles you is as big and as great as your imagination and your spiritual belief system allows it to be. Empower yourself.

Best wishes on your empathic journey. Please continue to question, search and research your gift(s).
Martin (129 posts) mod
16 years ago (2007-04-05)
Sounds like someone should consider a career in psychotherapy :) You really seem to have an empathy gift...

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