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I Have That Feeling Again And Again

 

everyone, for now I'm going to keep everything personal and just change the names of people and places. I've always struggled with what's real and what I'm just dreaming about. Here recently this year 2019, I was diagnosed with BPD (I don't know how it would help but I feel it's important). Yet I don't think it answers all my questions. I have been told a many of things when I try to explain and what I get the most is that I am an empath.

From a young age I've always seen glances of "things", I've heard my name being called and I've been completely alone, things will happen that I necessarily can not explain with rational explanations, I feel the moods of properties and people and not all are the best and it made working with delivering to houses hard. What gets me the most is these things escalate when I am in a good place in my life, I seem to notice everything happening. Last night about 11:30 I'm here, at my house, and a toy of my child's on a shelf is going off. It's a barn and you press buttons to make phrases and noises happen so it's a interactive toy. It keeps going through all the phrases and sometimes it doesn't stop and pause it just keeps making noises. I thought it was the air conditioning but it wasn't on during the time. It would make sense if there was someone else there but I was up by myself about 15-20 feet away from it. The more I ignored it the more it seemed almost louder? But you can't change its volume. I feel calm but very curious and I was trying to figure out what to do.

About 3 months maybe longer ago I experienced something I have never before. I started seeing bright white flashes, almost like a camera flash. It almost took my whole line of sight sometimes, didn't matter if the room was dark or broad day. Then that's when black mist-smoke started appearing as well... That is when I started having some fears because of how solid, tangent it felt. I felt fear immediately when I seen this black mist, it's almost like I couldn't control my emotions. The bright wouldn't scare me, more calm and wow that was amazing but why? I told my mother and seen a eye doctor and I was told my vision was perfect.

As I get older I put together these things and I sit and think about it because I want an answer. I live in a small town so there's no one near me that I can talk to about these things. I also live in the south where religion is everything, and I personally am not religious. I feel crazy and I can't put these thoughts together without help and the internet has not helped much.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, PeachyKeen, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

Lyro (439 posts)
 
1 week ago (2019-06-13)
It's alright, first thing is to calm down and know that you're not alone in any of these experiences. Without more detail I can't be certain on a lot of what you put, however I've experienced some of the same. I get small white flashes all the time, these are orbs that are around you. Some people can see them clearly, I see them as flashes. A few times I have had a major flash like you described, I've taken it as a more powerful spirit or maybe an angel. It always seems to come with a calm feeling and an almost heat in my head that kind of radiates through my face.

As far as the black mist, I did have one picture of something similar that may be what you were talking about. I've seen black figures typically small, and I've always associated them with the "sleep paralysis demon". I don't believe they are actually demons, but that's the name that was given to them. People who sleep have their bodies go into a natural paralysis, and some people when they wake up but are still in that state can see these black figures near them, and since they are frightened and can't move it just makes them that much more frightened. A friend of mine had this experience herself, and like I said I've seen quick black shadow movements. I was told by a past teacher that I would see these shadows, often times out of the corner of your eyes, but I was instructed to leave them be and not to even acknowledge their existence. They wouldn't hurt me, but they seem to not like when people can see them. As far as being around people during sleep, I think they cause fear, maybe even nightmares to feed off of fear but not actually harm you. The one I had a picture of wasn't actually black, it was more a dark grey with red eyes, like a dark cloud hiding in the shadows.

The toy going off makes me either feel like you have some kind of spirit around messing with it, or perhaps it can be your own energy. Especially when we get emotional we can start effecting electronics around us. Draining the power out of my phone or watch just by holding it during an emotion spike. A friend of mine had it where when she would start getting anxious the headset she was wearing would start producing static. Or the better side, when she really wanted to listen to a song on the radio hers turned on to spotify and started playing it across the room. I once got annoyed with the ads on Pandora, so somehow I started the app on my phone in premium mode without having a subscription, or a free trial listed on my account at all, it just happened. They later fixed it, but I didn't do anything just wanted it to happen. Often times these events are tied to our emotions, even when we don't realize it, and we can affect more than just electronics in this same manner. Now emotions are not bad, we just need to control emotion spikes, that comes in time though.

As far as hearing your name, that can be more than one thing, so I can't say for certain. Perhaps you are connected to someone through an Empathy link, or maybe it's a spirit around you. I once when I was much younger were getting yelled at by my parents and doing what any kid would do started to zone out and stop listening. As I did this I then started hearing a voice talk to me, it was like the wind was talking to me, and even though it was short it was still interesting. Now with Empathy I can't say that I've ever heard someone else. Being connected with someone I have seen what they've seen, smelled what they do, even taste, but never heard. However hearing would just be more signals coming from your sensory organs to your brain so I don't see why it would be any different from being able to picked up. However if they were saying your name I'd think it's more a telepathic link than Empathy since they would be talking to you not hearing what they are hearing.

I understand not being able to talk to anyone about a lot of the issues you are facing, I live not that far from you and we are in the "Bible Belt" of the states. These kinds of things aren't nearly as open as I'd like them to be, and it gets difficult to talk to someone out of the fear of sounding like a freak. I was stabbed in the back more than once for this reason so I stopped talking about it to people I knew in person. However since then I have met others I've been able to talk to as well. I know it can be difficult but you can also go through the archives of stories here and read other peoples experiences for yourself. Maybe some of these worlds will be able to help you, if you reply I may not see it since I don't visit the site very often, but if you have more questions feel free to shoot me an e-mail it's listed on my profile.
~ Lyro
Sofiia (1 stories) (4 posts)
 
1 week ago (2019-06-12)
Hi PeachyKeen
The white flashes you are describing, I have experienced them too. I still don't know what they meant/mean, but usually they were precursors to something extreme happening to me. Be it paranormal or just something in day to day life. So I'd suggest preparing for big changes!
If you'd like to discuss this further you can contact me at my email: sofiiaimmortal [at] gmail.com 😊

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