My Experiences Through The Years

I have always been sensitive to things I don't want to see, feel nor experience. I think my first experience, at least as I recall, was when I was five years old, I lived with my parents in Virginia, it was a full brick building and our apartment was pretty big. At night, I remember being in my bed, and when I would fall asleep, something would always wake me up, how can I describe this? I would feel little pinches on my feet, first soft then a little harder, non stop, I would always be afraid to open my eyes, but when I did, nothing was there, all I would see is the clown puppet dolls my sister had in a rack of the wall, it's kind of silly for me to mention this now but I swear I could see those clowns smiling at me, with this scary look, and I would move one side and I can swear they would follow me with their eyes, sometimes I would cover myself again with the blanket or hope into my sister's bed, because many times my mom and dad would say I was imagining things, or making it up just to go to bed with them, but I swear I did feel those pinches, when I would try to ignore and go back to sleep with my sister, or hiding under the blanket, the pinches would start all over again, and when I would look again, the puppets would not be in the same order. In the end my mom had to throw away the puppets, I was really traumatize with this, I could never sleep well until she got rid of them.

My sister didn't talk to me for some time, she's 3 years older than me and she would always say I did it on purpose because I didn't like clowns. Which is not true, well after that, I didn't. That was the first time I felt there was more to this world.

The second experience I had was when I was seven years old. I remember staying at my grandmother's house from my mother's side, my parents had divorce and we moved back to Puerto Rico. I remember I used to see this young lady. She would always come at night to play with me, sometimes I would wake up with bruises to my arms, legs, you know the kind of bruises you get when your playing around with friends and have little accidents, sometimes I would even argue with her. If you would ask me to describe her, I would say she had to be like 21 years old, she was very skinny, beautiful face, very sweet, her skin was very pale and her hair was very long, pale blond, almost white like the snow and straight, I remember she was always bare foot. Sometimes I thought it was only a dream, but I swear this was so real to me.

At night, my sister and my cousins would say I was a sleepwalker, they said every night I would scare them, because I would get up from bed, with open eyes and walk all over the house, sometimes I would sing, and play, as I would be playing with someone else, I would even open the gates of the house and get out, at 12am, it was dangerous. My sister and cousins would call my name but they could never wake me up, they said that more than funny it was scary. Anyway, to make the long story short, I played and talk with this woman for a long period of time, let's say more than 6 months, then something strange happen, the last night I stayed at my grandmother's house, I woke up late at night as usual to play with my friend (I don't think she ever gave me her name) and when she finally appeared, she asked me to go play with her at her house, I was only seven years old and I always followed my mom's rules because she was very strict so I told her I couldn't go with her, because my mom wouldn't let me, she was trying to convince me in any way, but I would say no, I can't even if I wanted to.

She started crying, and she looked very sad, so I asked her what was wrong, she said: "I always come to play with you, to your house and I ask you just this time to go play with me at my house and you say no", I said: am sorry but mom would get mad if I did go with you, and so on. She was crying and saying: "I don't have much time, you have to go with me"; but at one point, I guess she knew I wasn't willing to go with her, we were facing one another, face to face, she was right in front of me at my grandmother's kitchen, oh my God, she grabbed me by my right arm, like trying to push me towards her and she said: "I told you to come with me!", when she touched me I felt like, I don't know, I guess it's something like when a lightning hits you!, it was burning just where she was touching me, and when I looked down, there was a line separating us from places, my side was my grandmother's kitchen, her side it was the cemetery. Her side was dark, windy, I could see tombs, you could smell death and when I looked at her face, she had this mean look, her eyes would stare at mine, intense. Then she was gone, just like that. I remember this like it was just now and I am 34 years old, it was a scary experience. After that, years went by without me seeing her, I thought I would never see her again. I was wrong.