This is my story.
Before I begin let me explain something, I am of Hispanic decent or you could just say I'm a Mexican American. On my father's side, my grandparents moved to America from Mexico. From my mothers side, my grandmother is a Mexican American and my grand father is Anglo, also a quarter Indian. Let me begin my story.
It began when I was around 16, I was a junior in high school, I experienced my first panic attack. They were like any other, but I started to have them more frequently. I was on anti-depressants but they only made me worse. I began to hallucinate. But the question is, were they really hallucinations or something else.
At first it was just a feeling, a feeling of being watched, a feeling of unease. Then after awhile, black mist would appear and follow me, it always made me uncomfortable. Then it happened. I went to open the kitchen door to go out side and there was the mist blocking my way. The mist formed itself into a shadow silhouette of a man with a cowboy hat. It looked at me. I didn't see it but I could sense him smile or was it a smirk. And he extended his arm forward. I could see another black mist form in front of me into a black dog, the likes I not bring myself to describe. The man made a gesture and the beast lunged at me. The pain I felt was excruciating. I felt and saw everything but the people around me saw nothing. From then on I started acting funny and I had three things I was adamant to never go near. I only remember 2 of them. One was school, though I was a dedicated student, and the other was religion, though I was an altar server.
Many things occurred. But let me explain this first, with anxiety it is most common for people to hear voices that don't exist. Well I never had that problem. I was an unusual case. I had visions and hallucinations of things that don't exist.
But it is through these experiences that I learned a great deal about my family. For example, my grandmother is a psychic. She can read the cards, not tarot, she has the sight by looking at walls, glass, water, and rocks. She would work with oils. She has a great and powerful gift that comes with price of sickness. I have two aunts that can read cards, but they do not have the gift of sight. It is like knowing but not seeing, such as god. You know and believe in him but do not truly see or experience him. However, there are those fortunate that can. At first I thought I was like my aunts, knowing without seeing. But soon after I realized that I am like my grandmother. I can read the cards but in a different way and I find I can do this with regular poker cards. My family reads with the Spanish deck. I can do with both Spanish and American. My mom has dreams. She doesn't remember them but when she does, it usually means something. I have done readings with only a few friends and they are amazed. For I don't fish for information and most of the time I don't know what I am talking about. It is their reading that only they can understand. It is their choice to share with me what they believe it to mean. They all are amazed that what I say happens within a day or two.
I am 24 now and this started when I was 16. I have grown tired with writing so I will end it at this. I have seen the dead walk the streets. I have seen the demons' corruption. I have experienced the strange white glowing markings in my room before the appearance of a giant glowing crucifix with Christ appear on my closet, before he gets off and touched my forehead with his glowing white hand. I have been visited by some of the deadly sins and offered the chance to acquire a demonic body. I have envisioned hell, a pit it is not, but hell it is. I have seen the gates of heaven and looked upon the golden light. I have been visited by many and yet I have yet to overcome the thing that irritates me the most. I can see yet not hear. It is frustrating to be unable to speak with them. And this is all but a small piece of what I have experienced.
Yet again, their is always that question in the back of my mind, is this all part of anxiety or something else