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A New Friend

 

I'll try to condense the information as much as possible.

At my earliest age I was raised as a Christian. I was an average good little kid accept I would talk to people who weren't there. Specifically angels. I had one whom I talked to frequently that I said was my guardian angel. I can't remember the name. Later around age 5 my father worked 2-3 jobs and my stepmother was at home to raise 2 children who weren't hers, one of which was me and the other her daughter. My stepmother drank a lot and began to call me names, slap me and eventually began locking me in the closet for hours on end and waking me up in the middle of the night in a drunken rage to beat me. I would pray for my angel to help me every night but it never came. One night after the usual "routine" I went to sleep in tears and had a nightmare where I was running in the dark in a vast dead landscape with large shadowy figures with glowing eyes claws fangs and tails. Eventually I was surrounded and curled up in a ball to cry. All of the sudden an odd sensation swept over me and I stopped crying, or feeling anything and a raspy low, hissing voice spoke to me the first time "Kill them all." I began to grin and my eyes widened, I had another odd sensation flow over me as my fear to turned into, not as much rage so much as insane joy. I jumped onto the demons and clawed and yelled and bit my way through them. I remember what I thought was waking up directly after, hearing someone snickering and then seeing a very tall figure, so tall they had to bend over so as not to hit the ceiling, petting my hair on my head and then walking straight through my window on the second floor and vanishing. After that night my personality began to change and I became more assertive and confrontational. One night not long after this, I stopped the beatings. I was hiding under my bed crying, waiting, when I was dragged out from under my bed, getting rug burns on my arms, I was asked to hold out my already painful arms to have them hit with a belt. I cried, and then stopped crying and just shook and breathed fast, then I started to snicker, giggle and laugh as I was hit repeatedly. I grabbed the belt and choked her with it, she almost passed out, but then left the room in shock. I sat in my room cackling for about ten minutes until I broke into tears and then fell asleep. Ever since I have had a sort of split personality or a voice in my head, it doesn't force me to do anything but can take over as mentioned earlier. Later my mother would tell me I would talk like a demon and cackle in my sleep and one night she asked this version of me what I was laughing about and I said "I'm going to destroy everything."

After my life was less dramatic I stopped having these "phenomenon" occur, but recently I have seen and hear a lot of odd things that make it hard to be an atheist. Namely seeing words of light on a window "go seek the light" and hearing a voice in my head that says "you're not ready." I have only talked to this "friend" of mine a few times, and he doesn't like to talk. But when I asked why he was here with me he told me to look at my wrist and I noticed an odd tiny symbol/scar I hadn't noticed before in the shape of a crescent moon with a sort of oval next to it, kind of like a moon and a star, or a fancy A or G.

Don't really know what I'm asking of here, just if anyone knows any hardcore info on what's going on?

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Comments about this clairvoyant experience

The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, xGLITCHx, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

Chaplinman (1 stories) (3 posts)
 
7 years ago (2012-09-24)
As a christian myself I believe that it is quite obvious to you that you had come into contact with evil spirits for the possibility of holding evil thoughts and in these thoughts as a child these were thoughts that most children do not endure or even dream of. It was this state of mind that left you initial mind open as gates to the realm of the dark energies. Whatever you believe in if you have these sorts of visions perhaps it would be best to see some sort of religious leader. Any would do but find a faith that suits what you choose to believe in as clearly you are doubting your atheistic beliefs and realizing that there are things out there beyond our control that can only be tamed by a god. Different religions have different ways. It would seem that the positive entity that you had ordinal contact with is still trying to reach you if you are receiving the glowing messages of "go seek the light". Generally evil things hate light places in fact their very presents in a place that is bright tends to add a sort of dimming effect to a room. I would take this as a message to seek out what I have said. As well I would be aware that most likely in the incident that you attacked back and began to cackle you had become possessed and being as you claim that this sort of thing still occasionally occurs I would say that you may still hold a link to this entity and may need to find a way to destroy it.
vanillabean (9 stories) (168 posts)
 
7 years ago (2012-09-21)
Anne is so right about everything she said above. My heart goes out to both of you as it sounds as though you've had to endure just the worst treatment imaginable. If you are both in better places now, I am grateful.

XGLITCHx, it sounds as though you might be ready to move past these low vibrational entities. You might be suffering from a lot of negative emotions--anger, depression, anxiety--and these types of energies love to be around that sort of thing. The best way I know of to rid yourself of this kind of company is to "raise the energy" around you. You might want to look into smudging & burning certain herbs and resins like white sage, cedar, palo santo, frankincense, copal... As these can really help with mood issues and with cleansing your space if you do it with intention (i.e. Speak up and tell the entities they are not welcome any longer). It's probably a lot of self-work you need to do too, including meditation, which will help you to connect with yourself and with higher energies. The more you do that, the more lower energy will not want to be around you.

Considering this helper of yours is a low entity... It sure served a purpose. Makes me question a lot of things I thought I knew about lower energy.

Also as for being a cycle, like Anne said, if you don't rid yourself of this type of energy it can continue to spread it's negativity in a vicious cycle.
AnneV (4 stories) (1036 posts) mod
 
7 years ago (2012-09-20)
Violence and alcoholism are a perfect gateway for low level beings. It's no shocker you had issues with such a spiritually undeveloped woman in your house. Whether or not this "demon" was an actual one or a mental self defense mechanism (the subconscious mind is very powerful and can only take so much), no one can say for sure, but it served its purpose by terminating this dreadful abuse.

Sadly, many abused children continue the cycle (she herself may have been abused) but it sounds as if you are past this circumstance and mind set. Hopefully you can use the previous darkness to recognize so much light that is available to you now.

The scar/symbol is interesting but beyond any of our exteriors is vast potential to be incredible human beings within, working for the good of others. Each one of us is a microcosm of All That Is and if we can move from a difficult past (I suffered similar abuse from my step mother when I was young and also had subsequent poltergeist activity because of it) then we are even more equipped to be the compassionate teacher, healer, leader of the future; a person who helps others based on their own hard won life experience, and not lessons regurgitated out of a book. I hope that's you.

Anne

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