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Depression Setting In As My Awakening Comes To A Halt


Was hesitant about even posting anything because I didn't really receive much feedback on previous stories, but this is the only forum that may understand my plight. The last few months I have really been seeing things differently and experienced many unexplainable things happening to and around me. Past few weeks my senses have heightened, I have felt at peace, and overall happier. Well until this past week.

Meditating every day along with prayer has taken me to a level of consciousness I have never known. I was under the impression that persistence would pay off and my full awakening was just around the bend. Unfortunately I never reached that complete openess and it hurts so much inside.

My senses have always been heightened since childhood but even more so now. The slightest noise, whether sudden or expected causes extreme uneasiness and jumpiness, smells have become more prevalent, my vision, as I mentioned in another post is still randomly hazy picking up floating objects, and my body tingles quite frequently. None of this is attributed to medical issues because I have checked.

Only during one session have I caught a glimpse of an image in my minds eye of a person, who I cannot identify. The orbs around me have increased recently as seen in pictures I randomly snap every day, so I know there is a presence with me. Why can't I open up properly to see, hear or communicate at all with them? Is there something so wrong with me that I can't connect?

For the first time in my life I have felt a sincere closeness and connection with my true self, but its turning into an unpleasant experience not being able to connect fully. Visualization is a real problem for me that I have been working on through guided meditation with no success. Is that why I am unable to meet my spirit guides? Somebody please help me understand what is going on with me.

My ears ring randomly or get stuffy for some reason, my left eye lid jumps out of the blue lately, I'm constantly getting cold chills out of nowhere and my 3rd eye throbs without me even meditating now. It actually hurts. After doing some research it seems to me that what I have experienced and feel is a psychic/spiritual awakening, so why am I so slow progressing. As a child I did show signs of the "gift" but lost my abilities long ago. Could whatever reason I lost them be stagnating my progress at this time in my life? All the signs are here, I just feel like a total failure because I'm stuck!

If there is a sensitive person or someone with the ability to see what is happening with me out there could you please shed some light on things?!? Crying for no reason and feeling weird sensations all the time is no fun, especially when I cannot fully understand why it occurs. I thank you in advance anyone with some positive insight on my dilemma.

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, BrightEyes, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will participate in the discussion and I need help with what I have experienced.

BrightEyes (4 stories) (14 posts)
11 years ago (2013-09-09)
Thank you so much N.D.D. Your words of encouragement help a great deal. I have been doing just that, taking it slow & taken a break from meditation for a bit. My body feels as if it is replenishing and it feels good. I appreciate you taking time to chime in.
natural_day_dreamer (3 stories) (49 posts)
11 years ago (2013-09-08)
You may not recieve responses to some things you post here, but you should know that no matter what you are not alone <3

With that said, what many people have posted to this is very true. Stress with bog your body down, and since gifts and abilities are extensions of you, when you are exhausted or stressed or push to hard, they will not be as present. Your body knows this, and because there are more vital parts of your phsyical body (lungs, heart, temp, ect), the first thing to dim will be your third eye abilities. Think of it like being stuck out side in below zero temperatures. Your fingers will go numb, then your toes and arms and legs, ect, to preserve your internal organs. When youre exhausted or drained or stressed your minds eye will dim or even close for a while so your body can resume. If you continue in an unhealthy state, your body takes a hit too, you could make yourself ill.

So calm down! Take a week off! Do not push yourself to the point of exhaustion. If someone or thing is present with you, they are there for a reason. They won't leave you just because you can't see them f ully or hear them or if you don't understand. These things take time. Dont push yourself father than you are ready to go. Good thing comes to those who are patient with the world as and themselves. Do not dimminish yourself for not single handedly building gaining full consiousness over night. It will take time and you need to accept that.

Part of that time is spent learning how to balance youre third eye and abilities into daily life. Obviously you can't do this yet, and that is very much ok! We are not born with full understand and control. It is practiced, learned, excersized. If a runner runs every free hour of every day with no break, how long will they be able to go after so long of this? Not very because they will be so exhausted and weak. Thats what youre doing to yourself.

So be patient, be calm and understanding of yourself, know that you are not superman. Many of us took years to get where we are and still face these problems every so often still. We may have knowledge and abilities and widrr opened eyes than others, but we still have human bodies as they do.

There is NOTHING wrong with you love. And we may not answer you right away, but we are always out there, always together in minds eye, and always here for one another. And very much so here for you.

Get some rest for a while, then when youre ready, start slow. Youllget where youre meant to be when its meant to be <3

BrightEyes (4 stories) (14 posts)
11 years ago (2013-09-06)
Thimiz thanks for your input. I do suffer from a sleep disorder so I do not get enough rest. That is also something I have been working on. I know I have a higher calling to do better things and help people so that gives me comfort. I appreciate your response.
BrightEyes (4 stories) (14 posts)
11 years ago (2013-09-05)
Thank you very much. Since writing this post I have in fact settled down & realized my impatience with the process. As you said AnneV, the progress this far is what's important. I very much appreciate your encouragement. Thanks Thulsa as well.
Thimiz (1 stories) (24 posts)
11 years ago (2013-09-05)
I think your tears has carries a message with them, and that powers cannot vanish merely because they haven't been expressed or tapped into for a while.

I don't know when it began, perhaps its a western thing. But you can deal with what's going on, and go through emotion turmoil without your mind analyzing and understanding what's going on.

The only reason I believe you could be stuck, is because the mind is still standing with his foot in the door, desperate to see what's happening. So your body is not getting its required rest to rewire itself and ease the impressions putting them into context with who you are.

If your daily life is disrupted to a degree its not spiritual, its the mind just barging on the door. Your spiritual senses activates when you can handle them, the mind doesn't really care...
Thulsa (1 stories) (34 posts)
11 years ago (2013-09-04)
AnneV, your trying too hard and need to back off a little for awhile. Think of it as a can of coffee grounds. We all start out with it full and scoop it out spoon by spoon as the day goes on. At night let's say you get one scoop back per hour of sleep. Now if everyday you take out 8 scoops of energy and every night you get 8 hours of sleep your never going to run out. Now let's say You take out 8 scoops of energy, but only sleep 7 hours. Then the next day You take out 10 scoops of energy and sleep 8 hours. Then the next day You take out 9 hours of energy and You only get 6 hours of sleep because your worried about the day before. Do You see where I'm going with this, eventually if You keep at this pace You will totally run out of energy and become exhausted. This is how Your spiritual energy works also. You need to stay healthy to make the most of it both physically and spiritually. Take a break recoup and slow down a bit, don't try so hard and it will work out in the end.
AnneV (4 stories) (1064 posts) mod
11 years ago (2013-09-04)
Your "plight" is called life. We all have ebbs and flows to our unfolding. This is an area that can not be cajoled, pushed, forced, cried about or anything else. You yourself said you had some great progress over the last few weeks and then a lull. And this upsets you? There is no race to our spirituality. It unfolds when we are ready, not because we feel impatience, frustration and other negative emotions surrounding our work. You're focusing more heavily on the lull than the great things you've accomplished. How would a child like to be beat up on because they aren't moving mountains every single week? If we did that, it would make us terrible parents. If you can, try going easier on yourself.

Here is the good in what I read from your post; "For the first time I have felt a closeness to myself" (wow, that's great!). "My senses have heightened, I feel at peace and overall happy." (Embrace that! Now you know something you didn't know before; how good this feels and what it truly feels like-- take the gift and not stomp on it). "Orbs are increasing" (this is good).

In summary, a lot of positive is happening to you. The unhappiness is not the outcome but your thoughts about the outcome. Another person would be jumping for joy at all this progress.

You can keep working on what you think is your 'spirituality' but there is also another aspect and that is your attitude. We all need to look at that from time to time and make sure it's in check. As my wise mother-in-law loves to say, "Keep an attitude of gratitude".

You're doing great. Let's hope you can realize that and develop your patience, self-love and appreciation for your own special pace.

Best to you.

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