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Input From A Different Frequency

 

I've posted here before. I provided an email address, so other like-minded people could contact me. I got a number of responses, and communicated with some really cool people, but I don't think anyone really understood what it is I'm going through. I thought I'd give it another shot today.

I've felt very different throughout my life. As a child I never fit in with my peers. My interests were different than that of most children's. I was always deeply fascinated by the way things work. I was especially enthralled by nature.

I became aware of how different I am the first time during a high school pep rally. The whole school was in the gym, and a bunch of cheerleaders were on the gym floor, leading the school in some rallies before an upcoming football game. Everyone around me jumped up and began chanting along, pumping their fists in the air, and I could see that they were genuinely into it. But I felt not the slightest inclination to join them. I couldn't help but see their behavior as bizarre.

That would end up being the story of my life. I'm 41 now, and I've spent my entire life observing the behavior of others, more like an alien from another planet than as a human. At the same time, I know I'm human; I have two human parents, and a lot of human tendencies. But something about me makes me fundamentally different, to the extent that I'm an alien, for practical purposes.

I started reading the works of Carl Jung a little over a year ago, and was touched by Jung's writing. It had a profound effect on me. It opened my mind to new ways of thinking, and soon after I began experiencing what Jung calls "synchronicity". I also became aware of the synchronicity that had been occurring in my life up to that point.

I've written about my experiences in more detail in other posts, if you're interested in learning about them. I'll briefly mention the fact that I have strange experiences with time. Anytime I'm in a room with two clocks, and I'm alone, the seconds on the clocks synchronize perfectly. If I set the timer on a microwave, for example, and there's a clock in the room, the seconds will tick off the microwave in perfect sync with the clock. The same thing happens with the hard drive light on a computer (it flashes in perfect sync with clocks).

Like I said, I've detailed my experiences regarding time in other posts. I've also had strange experiences with dragonflies, and recurring numbers, like 314, 420, and 11.

Along with that, I'm highly empathic, and I've really experienced a lot of that lately. I'm especially in tune to the emotions of my Dad, so much in fact that I have to avoid being around him a lot of the time.

A few months ago there was a tragedy in my family. My Mom, who I'm positive has narcissistic personality disorder, totally flipped out. I won't get into the details, but I'll tell you that she betrayed my Dad, and me. I honestly never knew what betrayal was, up until a few months ago. Like most people, I know what it's like to have other people do crappy things to you, but what my Mom did was in a completely different category.

I went through a period of the most horribly negative emotions I'd ever imagined. I didn't know it was even possible to feel the way I did. At one point I even felt a very strong, negative "vibration" in my body (I've experienced similar, but very positive/euphoric vibrations during lucid dreams). I couldn't even move; I could only lay there and wait for whatever was happening to pass.

Now I'm feeling much better, in regard to what happened with my Mom. She's become a non-factor to me. I'm not even angry at her anymore. She's irrelevant to me, and now I can see that's a good thing. I'm free from a lot of the negative emotions I used to know, which came as a result of my very poor, shallow relationship with her.

Now, though, I feel more alone than ever. I feel more despair than ever, because I don't know how to even think about life. I don't feel like I have a purpose in this world. It's hard to have a purpose when you live amongst 7 billion humans and you don't feel like one of them.

I write and record songs, and also write fiction. It's something I've always enjoyed, but it's also caused me a lot of pain, because so few people care about what I do. It's left me always wondering, what's the point, if nobody cares? A lot of people will tell you that if you're going to do anything creative, you need to do it for the satisfaction it brings you, and not be concerned with the validation of others. As much as I can see the wisdom in that, I find it very hard to apply.

I've also been heavily involved in political activism. There's always been a handful of people who've supported me in this, but I don't see the point in that anymore, either. All it's really ever done is make a lot of people angry with me.

In short, I don't see the point in anything. I feel so different from ordinary people that I'm essentially alone here. Nothing I do ever seems to matter, making me wonder, what's the point in doing anything?

I've spent a lot of time asking and attempting to answer metaphysical questions, like what's the meaning to all this? Why is there a Universe, and why is there life? I've actually come up with some theories I find very plausible. I won't get into those now, but I'll tell you I believe that whatever's happening, it's happening for a reason, and a good reason at that. I see beauty in the Universe. I see goodness in the Universe. But that doesn't go very far in consoling me, when I feel so dreadfully alone.

I've met others somewhat like myself. They were all women who experienced a lot of trauma in their lives. One I'm even friends with, though she's married, so I'm very limited in the interaction I can have with her. I went and visited with her the other day. She's going through a tragedy of her own, and as we talked about life, she had a look in her eyes I could completely relate to. It's the look of someone weary, and out of place, and in a word, 'alien'. More than anything, she wishes people weren't the way they are. My number one complaint about life on Planet Earth is the way people are. They create a tremendous amount of suffering, and most of it unnecessarily.

I'm not saying I'm an angel, because I'm not, but I've always wished people weren't the way they are. They can be decent at times, but most of the time they're not all that decent, and at times they can be downright horrible.

I love this planet. I feel like it's my home, and where I belong, but I feel a little uneasy around most people. I tend to get along well with people. For example, I usually head out a couple of times each week and jam with some other musicians, and they like having me around. I like being around them, especially where we're playing music, but I can never escape the feeling that deep-down, I'm not one of them. I can recognize that they all have something in common, and that I don't share that with them. Where they all act naturally, it takes effort on my part to be like them.

I feel like I can't be myself around most people. Again, it requires a deliberate effort on my part to be like ordinary people. I have to remember how they think (or maybe more appropriately, how they don't think), and behave as though I think like them, when I really don't. It might sound arrogant, but in a lot of ways I feel like an adult around a bunch of kids who still believe in Santa Clause. I feel like the one person who knows Santa Clause isn't real, and it comes as a real burden to me.

Anyway, this is getting long, so I'm going to wrap it up. As for the title of my post, "Input from a different frequency", I believe there are certain people who receive input from a different frequency, or a different source, than normal people do. The brains of normal people, I believe, receive input only from their environments, and the things around them. But I think there are some people who get some of their input from a non-physical source, or multiple non-physical sources. What that source is (or sources are), I really have no idea, but I believe it pertains to something higher.

I realize that the above paragraph may not seem very profound; maybe even something you've considered or already believe yourself. Where it is actually profound, I think, is in helping people like me understand why we're so different, and why we feel so alien. We feel different because we're literally tuned into a different frequency than ordinary people are. You might even say that ordinary people aren't tuned into anything, but are instead merely reacting to physical stimuli, and in that sense, purely automatic.

Do you ever get the impression that the vast majority of people you know are automatons? Do you ever notice a slightly blank look in the eyes of almost everyone? I do.

I hope I don't offend anyone with what I'm going to say next, but I think it's important I say this. I think there are a lot of people who might actually have paranormal abilities, but who also want to feel special as a result. Most people are looking for things to distinguish themselves from other people, and a psychic ability is great for that.

It may be my age, or other factors, but I'm not writing this because I want to feel special. I'm not looking to have anyone tell me I'm special, or a starseed, or anything like that. What I'm really hoping to find is people who understand what I'm talking about. I'm looking for people who understand the intense feeling of alienation I've described, who feel painfully different from others. Who might, even at the risk of sounding arrogant, describe themselves as being somewhat "awake", surrounded by 7 billion humans who mostly aren't.

If you can relate to my story, feel free to email me at:

Whiskeydango at gmail.

All the best!

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The following comments are submitted by users of this site and are not official positions by psychic-experiences.com. Please read our guidelines and the previous posts before posting. The author, Greggb, has the following expectation about your feedback: I will read the comments and participate in the discussion.

robmkivseries70 (35 posts)
 
1 year ago (2018-06-03)
Hi All,
It occurs to me there is a movie you should try, "What the Bleep do We Know" is the title. If you can, watch the extended cut as it addresses the very same questions that you and others are asking. While it won't have all the answers it will help with the questions. The movie has been out over 10 years now and didn't get much play time so you may have to search for it.
Best,
Rob
roof1111 (guest)
 
2 years ago (2018-04-14)
Thank you Greggb, this is the first time I've felt I wanted to write something, I came on this site to hear other peoples experiences with day to day living while being highly sensitive to their environment and your comment on the football game made me laugh in the living room!. I have tried my best also on many occasions to 'partake' in these type of things, totally opening up to the opportunity of being swept up and away,mind,body and spirit in these events,but,no,the heart and soul ain't buying it! When I was a kid and it was only ever my brother that got to go over to my gran and granddads house when Scotland were playing on TV, all I felt at the time was envy cause I knew he would be getting chips for his tea. I must've moaned enough about it to my mum and dad at the time that I was allowed to take part in the jovialaties on one occasion (happened to be an occasion when Scotland scored!) and like yourself found their celebratory behavior and oneness in the moment totally bizarre but also very intriguing especially as I wasn't feeling a part of it at all and don't get me started on New Year! I usually became friends with the bathroom at five minuets to midnight just to avoid that moment all together. The most common feeling I remember growing up was confusion and disconnection from those around me. I was constantly puzzled by other peoples behavior and action, they never seemed to match what I could see and feel when I looked at them and I was forever getting into trouble for saying the wrong things, most of the time being totally unaware that i'd even said anything. My teens and 20's were a bit of a roller-coaster,forever trying to fit in to situations or always trying to make thing work, usually damaging myself in the process and getting so bent out of shape that I had no idea who I was or how I truly felt about anything. During my 30's things began to iron out. I became aware and intolerant of the things that weren't serving me anymore and had to weed them out. It was a messy process,however, one divorce, two breakdowns and three house moves later, I have never felt so much like me and happy with who I am (most of the time anyway). I too see synchronicity in the world around me, think I always have, lately its all the 2's,seeing the number on the clock, receipts even on stones down the beach. Sometimes it gets a bit much and wears me out but I seem to be getting better at unplugging myself from it. I have no idea what the big big picture is, like everyone else, or why I can see and feel things that some others can't but I do know that I don't want to spend the rest of my life trying to puzzle it out. I can easily lose myself in the metaphysical stuff from seeing energy around me, purple eyes when meditating, even the clouds stop moving for a micro moment, its all very interesting but I'd probably never see or spoken to another human being for weeks during it and how one fulfilling interaction with another person can blow all that other stuff out the water. It took me a while to find this site,must've been asking google the wrong questions, but it is such a relief and comfort to read other peoples stories, even if they don't match mine just knowing there are others who have awareness and experience things on different levels. It makes me more confident in who I am and helps me feel more valid in my place in the world, whatever that turns out to be.😊
Yellow13 (1 posts)
 
2 years ago (2018-04-10)
I feel the same way as you. You truly mentioned my own view of seeing things.

I'm glad that you're also aware of these things, now I don't feel like a real alien.

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